Customer Reviews

(Not That You Asked): Rants, Exploits, and Obsessions

5 star:		(36)
4 star:		(4)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Here's how much I enjoyed "(Not That You Asked)":

The publisher sent me a free advance softcover proof last month, and I still bought a new hardcover the day it was officially released. If you knew how frugal (read: cheap) I am, you'd understand how remarkable this is.

Why shell out my hard-earned for a book I've already read and gotten for free? Because I wanted to send Random House the message that Steve Almond is a huge talent, the real deal, and they better keep publishing him.

So "enjoyed" is kind of a weak verb.

I love this book, is what I'm saying.

I love that Almond takes aim at the easy targets -- Oprah, Fox News, Condi, Reality TV -- in fresh, hilarious ways, but places himself in the crosshairs more than anyone. I love that his long fanboy tribute to Kurt Vonnegut, "Everything Was Beautiful and Nothing Hurt," nails exactly why *I've* "crush[ed] on Kurt Vonnegut" for more than half of my life.

I love that no matter what subject he's tackling -- fake breasts, masturbation, unplanned fatherhood, body waxing, blog wars -- Almond surprises and delights and makes me think while I'm laughing and laugh while I'm thinking.

Clearly I've lost all objectivity with this book. Let me at least attempt to inject a little balance by enlisting the help of four friends. The quotations below are from people I either loaned the book to or bought the book for. None of them actually know I'm quoting them on Amazon, but I don't think they'll mind (not that I asked).

Here are their actual reactions:

Martha (via e-mail, two days after I loaned her my advance copy): "Steve Almond is my new favorite author. Loved it. Love LOVE LOVE LOVED it. Can't wait to buy a copy. Wonderful recommendation. He's funny and poignant and kickass. I want to be his best friend."

John (via e-mail): "Thank you for the book. I've already started reading it and it is laugh-out-loud funny. I'm definitely going to his reading when he comes to Fresno."

Chuck! (via e-mail): "Just wanted to let you know I received your kind gift of Steve Almond's book. How exciting! I read the first chapter on Oprah almost immediately and I'm still laughing about it. Can't wait to read more tonight when I get home!"

Karen (sitting next to me on the couch): "This is the best book I've read all year. I can't put it down. I have a stack of papers to grade by tomorrow, but I can't stop reading. I have to assign this book to all of my lit and creative writing students. It will change everything."

See? It's not just me.

Not That You Asked is the third book I've read by Steve Almond, and I would have to say that so far, this is my favorite. As with all of Almond's previous work, Not That You Asked has the all of the sharp wit, cutting insight,irreverance,sex,laugh-out-loud humor and great storytelling that Almond's fans would expect, but this book delivers more... it delivers HIM! The book offers a naked, unflinching, honest, and truely human view into Almond himself. Especially funny and touching are the stories of his childhood and adolecence, which are full of all of all of the secret, awkward insecurities, fears, and humiliations that most of us experienced at that age (as well as a few I'm glad that I didnt), but never discussed with anyone. Instead of hiding them, Almond lays them out for all to see. We watch as Almond progresses from being a teenager full of secret doubts, fears, and neurosies, to becoming an adult full of secret doubts, fears, and neurosies...just like most of us. It is brutally human and real, and at the same time, VERY funny.

In some ways, this book seems a little dated and jaded - Almond takes on some easy targets - the Bush Administration, the shallowness of most bloggers, his own often-ridiculous sex life (join the club!), celebrity culture, reality TV - these are just a few.

But there are four elements that, for me, elevate this work beyond the familiarity of some of the topics it covers:

1) Almond is a terrific writer: His prose is snappy and spot-on. He finds the perfect words to describe things you might too have observed but never could have put so artfully. He's often very funny, but always in a smart and honorable way - he deserves the laughs he gets.

2) Almond has a great eye: He lives in the same world we do, but he's somehow removed himself enough that he sees it much more clearly than most of us ever could. What's wonderful and generous is that he shares that view with you.

3) Almond has had some really interesting things happen to him: Yeah, a lot of people have complained about reality television, but how many were actually the subject of an episode of a reality show? Almond was, and the experiences and insights he shares will make it impossible for you to ever watch an episode of "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" in the same way again (of course, it's devoutly to be wished that you're not watching that show at all, but you get the point). Likewise, many have complained about the Bush Administration, but how many left good jobs to protest its actions, and subsequently were attacked on conservative talk shows for doing so? Almond has, and his story is both hilarious and deeply frightening. In some way, I enjoy his essays in the same way I'd enjoy the story of a mountain climber - I'm not schlepping up that hill, but it's deeply fascinating to read about someone who did.

4) Almond has a big heart and strong moral vision: While Almond can be snarky and sarcastic, he's not doing it for the cheap laugh or because he has nothing better to offer. Almond really cares about this planet and the people who live on it. He wants us to be better: fairer, kinder, more loving and more respectful of the interconnectedness of all living beings. What outrages him most is cruelty, selfishness and the squandering of the great gifts we've been given and should share. That's the deeper message of this book, and Almond communicates it in beautiful language without ever sounding preachy or superior.

So, five stars for Mr. Almond and this enjoyable and enlightening book of essays.

Scott Sherman, author, First You Fall: A Kevin Connor Mystery

Despite the fact that this outstanding collection of essays is being primarily promoted as a racy, sexy read, 'Not that You Asked' is a much more profound work, and I believe that many readers will love it. You will indeed laugh -- out loud, really hard -- but you will also be moved and provoked to think and consider important questions and values. The 'spine' of this book is comprised of Almond's honesty and his cracklingly clever take on life; that is, his life. This is what makes 'Not that You asked' so compelling to me -- Almond holds nothing back and reveals to readers not only his adventures and joys, but also his times of doubt and uncertainty. I feel this book hits on many universal struggles; for writers, families, spouses and families, and what America is and does as a country and a society. All the while, Almond's hilarious style keeps the read fresh and fascinating. The essays are extremely varied in topic but they all fit together marvelously and there's a special flavor to the collection, a
really fine flavor. This is a must-read, folks. Enjoy it!

My stomach hurts from laughing too hard...Steve Almond's book almost got me "thrown out" of Borders for making a spectacle of myself. Okay, seriously, I had never heard of Almond or read any of his other books. I opened this one to the middle of the text, to see if it would "grab me" the same way the cover had...and I found myself laughing out loud in rapid-fire response to everything I read. I was transported into Almond's bizarro world and got lost. When I came up for air, other Border's customers wanted to know why. (Only three.) I closed the book, and marched to the cashier. I now own it. And so does my brother, because I had to send him a copy (since we grew up with the same twisted humor, I knew he'd enjoy it, too.) I have since come to find out my brother LOVED Candyfreak. Who knew?

I hope Mr. Almond won't mind that I consider this publication to be of the potential "bathroom book" variety...you can pick it up, read a chapter, put it down, and be totally uplifted. His humor is zany and the chapters speak of things many people would never dare to voice because they would be afraid to admit they'd even had the thought. Almond is brave enough to be totally vulnerable, and that is magnetic for most people. It is a book you will read and then feel moved to share, to gift to others, to reread, to take on vacation, to the doctor's office, in line at the registry...you get the idea. Fantastic.

Where to start? Steve Almond is a such a gifted writer -- he makes me laugh. hard. Often just thinking about things he has written makes me laugh out loud. Sometimes at inappropriate times. He is a comedic genius. I bought NTYA during one of the worst weeks in my life (I'll spare you the details), and the fact that Steve could make me laugh when all I had been doing is crying says it all. Reading his book is like spending time with a good buddy -- you walk away feeling like you truly know him and love him... love him for being so real and so honest and saying the things that you've thought before -- saying them in such a brilliant way. Buy this book for yourself. And then buy more copies to give as gifts -- because once you've read it, you'll want everyone you know to read it.

I picked up a copy of "Which Brings me to You" years ago at my local library. I found it to be both savory and sweet and absolutely delicious. Since then I've had a huge craving for anything he's written.

"Not That You Asked" satiated my hunger for more. It probably helped that I consider him my male doppelganger. We both share a love of candy, the Oakland A's, have a connection to the Bronx, were arrested as teens and admit to watching (or in his case actually being on) Dance party. Steve embraces his dork side and pervert side with equal reverence which is so refreshing.

There are so many things I admire about Steve Almond. He's a talented and gifted writer and his ego has yet to catch up with his talent. He has never compromised his art in order to move himself up into a higher tax bracket or to please those that could help him move in that direction (Ya hear that NY Times Book review!!!.... you s - - k. )

His vulnerability is most evident and heartbreaking in the chapter about his obsession with Vonnegut. You want to just hug him and tell him that in some way he has affected the lives of others. For me it's his ability to write about the absurdities of life and make it funny.......he just consistently cracks me up.

I will continue to spread the word and recommend Steve to everyone I know. Many have thanked me profusely. Now if I could just get them to show their gratitutde with candy

I barrelled through NTYA, and the closer I got to the end, the sadder I felt, knowing that I was almost finished. When I closed the book and set it down, I was so full of longing, I opened it up and started again, from page 1.
Steve Almond has written, by far, the most hilarious book I have read in years (ever?) I marked lines and passages to come back to when I need a quick pick-me-up. Almond's style is so brutally, lay-it-ALL-out-there honest, you can't help but admire him. And you certainly can't help but be extremely entertained. A fabulous collection. I think I may need to go read it again right now. Just writing this is making me miss it.

If you're familair with Steve Almond's fiction then you already know the humility, hilarity, and truth he brings to his characters. Prepare to meet the man behind the curtain: In (NOT THAT YOU ASKED) Rants, Exploits, and Obsessions, Almond turns that poetic, unsettling eye on the non-fictional world, as well as on himself.
In this collection of confession-style essays, including letters to Oprah, his heart-wrenching writer-crush on Kurt Vonnegut, and his run-in with a hostile blogger, Almond keeps returning to the same theme: our role in the state of the planet, and how we must examine those roles again and again. In trying to make sense of it all, Almond writes, "Despair is a form of hope. It is an acknowledgment of the distance between ourselves and our appointed happiness. At certain moments, it is reason enough to live." Almond's genius lies in the delicate concurrence of harsh truths and deep human empathy. Each time he points a finger it inevitabley boomerangs and Almond, true to form, resists hiding behind the pretty picture of the self-righteous author. This book is unique in it's unwavering pledge to tell the truth (even when ugly) and it's incredibly human voice. You get the sense that Almond sits down to write about a subject but finds his own role as an observer simply unavoidable.
A tip: Don't skip the foot notes -- possibly the most hilarious part of a book that covers both Condoleeza Rice and adolescent debauchery.
Another tip (this one from Almond): "Nipples are tricky. They come in all shapes and sizes and shades. They do not, as a rule, look like much of anything, aside from nipples."
(NOT THAT YOU ASKED) is simply a great read -- both entertaining and important. And, contrary to the title, it will leave you asking for more, more, more Steve Almond.

I enjoyed this book of essays very much. It had parts that were laugh-out-loud funny, but it was not on the same caliber as David Sedaris. Actually, it was closer along the lines to Chuck Klosterman, but with more of a political slant. I would read his other books, but I wouldn't go far out of my way to seek them out.