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Not Under My Roof: Parents, Teens, and the Culture of Sex Paperback – November 1, 2011
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“I just finished reading Amy Schalet’s wonderful book, “Not Under My Roof”, and can’t say enough good things about it. It’s easy to read and understand. As the CEO of an almost 100-year-old nonprofit, the American Social Health Association, whose purpose is to educate American’s about how to be sexually healthy, this book is spot on. We tell people every day that parents are critical in starting a child on a sexually healthy life. It is my sincere hope that every parent will read this book.
About the Author
Amy T. Schalet is assistant professor of sociology at the University of Massachusetts, Amherst.
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Top Customer Reviews
As Schalet explains, Dutch society has developed a template for "normal" and healthy adolescent sexual development that fosters emotionally committed relationships under parents' and adults' watchful gaze. Although she is scrupulously fair in admitting its imperfections, Schalet shows that this template leads to clearly superior health outcomes, since Dutch teens have much lower rates of unintended pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, and abortions than do American teens. By contrast, American teenage sexuality is a battleground pitting girls against boys, parents against children, and ungovernable adolescent peer groups against ineffectually authoritarian adult laws and norms. Few of the participants on the American scene seem particularly happy with the way things are. This is where Amy Schalet's book is so valuable: she shows that things could be otherwise.
As a piece of scholarship, this book is of sterling quality: it recognizes and respects the cultural and institutional forces at work in each country's approach to adolescent sexuality. Schalet demonstrates that culture shapes behavior and experience powerfully, but that cultural change is also possible: the Dutch approach to sexuality is a recent, post-1960s innovation.Read more ›
As the parent of a 23 and 17-year-old, I am humbled by how very much I had to learn. From the first time I heard Amy speak, I was forever changed as a parent. Thank you Amy!
Believe it or not, sex is a healthy part of relationships. Will I let my daughter have her boyfriend over for the night when she is 16? Absolutely, as long as they have shown they are going about the relationship in a mature manner. Would I rather her get caught having sex in the back of a car in a parking lot? Would I rather her tearfully tell me she is pregnant because she was too scared to ask about birth control?
Read it and think. Of course not everyone will agree, but it will give you a different perspective.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Spare yourself the money and don't read this pathetic pamphlet. The book's assertion boils down to "learn to accept that your child is engaged in promiscuous immature behavior... Read morePublished on April 6, 2013 by Joseph
Book was like it was described and the book came right on time which made it even better. I would recommend this product to other peoplePublished on March 4, 2013 by Melissa
A clear and compelling account of the difficulties facing parents and teens as they grapple with the growing independence of looming adulthood. Read morePublished on May 7, 2012 by Greggor Mattson