Customer Reviews

Notes on Love in a Tamil Family

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I read this book for the first time over 3 years ago, and have come again for a second read. The book had enlightened me for my trip to Tamil Nadu and how to relate to people in Tamil Nadu. What I liked most about the book was Margaret's open and accepting attitude that I felt throughout the book in her experiencing various and very radically different things than we are used to in USA. The moment which stuck out most for me was when she described how an elder was caring for a baby and had in some way touched the baby in a way that in US we would find odd. The way she wrote it I could completely relate to her situation, and having seen such activities in India itself, I remembered Margaret's book. It is written in a very reader-friendly way and as a reader, I was able to visualize her stay and feel her emotions in a way many authors are not able to express, especially in an anthropological account. I highly recommend this book for any anthropology, cultural studies, Indian studies or anyone interested in reading an interesting account of India.

This is a readable, interesting, thought-provoking and emotionally involving book with much valuable and accurate information about Tamil culture. I was particularly intrigued by the author's ideas about the emotional signicance of various family relationships. However, the members of the particular family that the author studied closely seemed very damaged psychologically. It was painful to read about the sadistic and masochistic games they played with each other, and especially with the children. Their life histories suggest that they were affected by poverty, parental loss and abuse, all of which may be common in Tamil Nadu but are not intrinsic to the culture. The author acknowledges the "eccentricity" of the family, but "pathology" might be a more accurate term. My own experience with a Tamil family has been very different.