Well, I'm a history teacher and I sure understand your frustration. I've been teaching the same history 101 for 25 years and each year, after all that time saying the same things over and over again, these kids STILL arrive not knowing the material.
In short, not everyone is a chef, not everyone claims a degree in culinary arts and they would not have some of the background you appear to. That said, however, I suspect that if you approached the humans at Cuisinart with anywhere near the attitude behind your reviewer-insulting diatribe, they'll likely react in ways that will not get you anywhere. What astounds me is that if you know you can make ice cream with a whupper, why the heck you would spend money on this machine.
I've owned a Cuisinart icecream maker for the past three or so years. It was given to me by a friend who knows my LOVE of all things icecream and I LOVE mine. She gave me one with two bowls, which I keep in the freezer at all times. The recipes are easy to follow; my favorite is the lemon sorbet which I varied a bit by first making the simple syrup then adding chopped fresh ginger and fresh chopped mint leaves. I leave those ingredients in the syrup for several hours while the syrup cools. Then I strain out the ginger and mint and follow the instructions to make the best sorbet (even if I do say so myself) I've ever tasted. Friends rave about it. All you who are griping that yours don't work....well, what can I say. I haven't bought store-bought icecream in the years that I've owned my Cuisinart.
My knowledge of the kitchen comes from years of good old fashioned experience in both commercial kitchens and through my own experimentations at home, and what you described being made with the cold stainless steel bowl, the cold whipping cream, and the whisk, is called whipped cream. It's not ice cream. Also, I'm assuming that the brand of ice cream maker you used previously had a power plug, and therefor, an internal cooling method. The reason for freezing the bowl on this model is to simulate this without actually requiring direct electricity. This is why the product is so much cheaper. Not all of us can afford a pricey Kitchen-Aid mixer and all of its accessories, nor does everyone have space or use for something like that, which is why people are interested in this Cuisinart model. And, while I'm sure you are extremely proud of yourself for finishing culinary "school", the fact is that it does not make you any more intelligent than anyone else, and it certainly does not make you a "chef". Your lack of knowledge about fresh whipped cream suggests that perhaps you are not the culinary expert you claim to be. And if that's what they taught you in school then perhaps you ought to be redirecting your angry letters at them for "lies and false advertising".
Cuisinart can't help it that some people are too ignorant to even make something simple like ice-cream. I have a cuisinart ice-cream maker, and find it so simple and easy to use, that even a child can use it.