Customer Reviews

Old Wife's Tale, An: My Seven Decades in Love and War

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This is a very well written book offers a chronicle of American life since the 1940s that would be hard to match in wisdom on subjects ranging from the relations between the sexes to the relations between America and the world.

Midge Decter is known for her frequently ocntroversial stands on modern social issues. An Old Wife's Tale is her thoughtful examination of the lives of American women and men over the last 60 years, as viewed through the lens ofher own life. From stories of her youth during World War II-when Dectoer and her friends learned that "only the class beauty and the class tramp had no difficulty with the dating system"-to a surprising and often hilarious picture of what the Fifties were really like, to an account of her later roles as single mother, publishing executive, happily married woman, political iconoclast, and doting grandmother, Decter paints a singular portrait of a life lived on the front lines of American culture

I was initially put off by Decter's claim that she is a sort of Everywoman of the past 30 or so years. But I was surprised at how true it turned out to be. Her comments on most women's inner fears over the sexual revolution and the prospect of life without "a man" jived completely with my memories of the period. Her descriptions of the political climates of recent presidencies were also right on target.

Apologies--this is not a review, simply a note to where to find one. There's an appreciation of Decter's life and works in the 12/3/01 Weekly Standard.

Midge Decter may be the most eloquent female "Don Giovanni" since the Wife of Bath! Incredible stuff -- particularly her long (and sometimes painfully clinical) study of the clitoral orgasm.

Decter may no longer consider herself a feminist, but her book is positively jam-packed with what Simone de Beauvoir called the "joie de Tel Aviv."

I am of the same generation as Decter. She followed the lives of women chronologically during the past about fifty years up to the present. Her observations are exactly correct. It is very obvious how and why the lives of many of the younger women today are confused and in turmoil as a direct result of the feminist movement. We older gals are thankful that we were not and are not a part of the victimization imposed upon women the past thirty or so years. We like and love ourselves, our families and friends, and our men.

Midge Decter was a publishing executive, the executive editor of Harper's, a single mom in New York, studied at the Jewish Theological Center, and held a variety of other postions and roles, and yet fails to paint a portrait of any of the places or people she has encountered. I bought this book because it was described as a "Memoir," but it should be classified as an Essay instead. She spends plenty of time discussing her views on life, but none describing the colorful characters she has met and worked with, or the personal experiences that led to her political views. As a fan of autobiographies, I was dissappointed, and would suggest this book only to those who are interested in reading an essay about extremely conservative values and extremely traditional roles for women.

The perpetuation of women's subjugation by their own members is one of the saddest chapters in the millenia-long history of women's struggle for equality. I see it in my own grandmother's attitude toward my mother: a bitterness bordering on rage. How dare my mother pursue a successful career outside the home? I have not suffered because of it. Children have only to gain from the success of mothers outside the home, for it only increases their respect for their mothers in this increasingly economically-driven society to see the mom contribute tangibly to the economic life of the family. (This, of course, is not to say that the mothers who do stay home do not contribute economically to their families; rather, they support in intangible ways.)

It makes me sad to see the complete internalization of subjugation by Ms. Decter.