Customer Reviews

Once They Hear My Name: Korean Adoptees and Their Journeys Toward Identity

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I have just finished reading Once They Hear My Name. The book portrays, through biographical accounts, the complex issues faced by international adoptees as they weave together the varying strands of their experience into a coherent sense of adult identity. The stories, engrossing and moving, ring very true to this parent of a twenty-something daughter and son, both born in Korea. I could only read one chapter at a time, because I had to take time to digest and ponder it before moving on to the next. Adoptive families have many more resources for knowing about the special issues that adoption confers during a child's infancy and childhood than during adolescence and, especially, adulthood. I believe this book will resonate with the large, long-established community of internationally adopted persons and their (birth and) adoptive families living in the United States and in other countries around the world. Each adult adoptee from Korea interviewed for the book had a unique story to tell; yet, common issues appeared in all. The book provides a valuable service in framing these issues--especially because they are so respectfully presented in the words and from the viewpoints of the adoptees themselves. Don't read the book to find easy answers. Instead, read it to begin to understand the journey that adopted men and women are making. Read it, also, to be heartened by their courage, insight, humor, and strength!

As the grandparent of a young grand-daughter adopted a year ago from China, I found this book to be highly informative, and have passed it on to my daughter and her husband. The book brings home, through the poignant words of the adoptees and the sensitive treatment of the authors how important it is for families adopting from other cultures to expose their adopted child to the culture of origin and to encourage the child to explore his/her origins, even if the biological parents cannot be identified. I highly recommend it to prospective parents who are considering cross-cultural adoptions as well as to the current parents of such children.

I had the opportunity to read this book while I was on a small vacation. When I began I didn't know that what was I was going to read was Korean adoptees' stories in their own words. I could not wait to read each one as to experience the differences within their particular story and the similarity that Korean adoptees experienced. I thoroughly enjoyed it. The stories were heartwarming, even in all the sadness and struggles they expressed. I saw in them courage and growth and understood in ways I couldn't have before reading the book what being adopted within another country, another culture can create for the one adopted. I read this book with the heart of a human being meeting the hearts of other human beings in their journeys. I also read it with the eyes of a psychotherapist who has worked with adoptees in their struggles, but to have the added insight about the cross cultured adoptees was enlightening and informative.

As a psychotherapist I have had the good fortune to learn a great deal about the journey toward identity by adoptees. I have worked with clients who themselves were adopted and with clients who are raising an adopted child. I also have friends and family members in both categories.

Yet in reading this book I found myself learning about a whole new layer of nuance and complexity. I found it a very interesting, and easy, read.

I gave a copy of this book to my 18-year old nephew, an adoptee from South America, who looks like a Hispanic immigrant. Growing up he struggled when well meaning strangers addressed him in Spanish. He seemed pleased to get this book.

I highly recommend Marilyn's book to anyone who cares for or about someone adopted or adopting from a different culture.

This book is a very fast read, maybe because I was so familiar with the stories already- as they echoed my own. This book should be mandatory reading for any adoptive parent that is adopting from a foreign country and for teenage adoptees so they understand they are not alone. While their story is of course, personal, it is also shared with millions of other adoptees struggling to find out where they fit in, in this wonderful country.

The writings are in essay form and they aren't always the most well-written, but the story is easily understood.

Highly recommend.

The item arrived on time and was in good condition. I look forward to reading the stories of the Korean Adoptees soon.