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4.3 out of 5 stars
Online Dating For Dummies
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37 of 39 people found the following review helpful
on November 23, 2005
Format: Paperback
Most of what this book says is either common sense or easy to find out by using an online dating service. They sound uncomfortable enough with computers that they seem to expect readers to prefer reading a generic description on paper to reading the online descriptions that the dating services provide.

Their idea of backing up email is to print it out.

They say on page 183 that meeting in person gives away your anonymity completely, then on page 237 they describe how to meet in person anonymously. That is fairly typical about how carefully they write.

Instead of this, I recommend buying Katz's I Can't Believe I'm Buying This Book.
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36 of 40 people found the following review helpful
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
As a fellow relationship/dating author and advisor, I'm always looking for new information on this dynamic field. I was eagerly awaiting the arrival of this book because of the thorough nature and quality of the "Dummies" series. After a complete reading of this book where I took a lot of notes, I must say that it does an outstanding job of covering online dating and other related topics.
You get a certain type of quality when you buy a "Dummies" book. I didn't expect this one to be a great literary read or even one that I'd call "entertaining" (except for the hilarious cartoons in the beginning of each chapter). This book is simply stuffed with practical information and helpful tips. I do a lot of research on "Online Dating" issues and this is the best single source that I've found. If you ever come across any of my advice anywhere, you can bet that it won't be out of alignment with what is in this great resource.
This is a book that every man or woman who chooses to play the "online dating game" to win (find a good love partner) should have in their personal library. It's really that good.
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13 of 13 people found the following review helpful
on August 9, 2007
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
I liked this book, but it isn't a book of answers. However, if you are a newbie to online dating, it helps a lot to read this book.
Most online daters have no clue what they are doing. The successful ones that you see on TV (doing eharmony commercials) are the lucky ones. That's why this book helps. It first gives you the low down on online dating and why it is completely different from real world dating. Since it is so different, everyone needs to take a different approach to it. Surprisingly, not everyone does.
How many times have you winked at someone and not recieved a response? How many profiles have you read that say, "I don't know what to write?" How many emails have you sent out that just didn't work?
Well, this book explains why these things happen in online dating.

However, it isn't a book of answers. It won't tell you what the perfect profile is, but will give you hints on how to write one. It won't tell you what the best picture is, but it will tell you not to post the same one twice. Treat it as a guide and you will be fine. Treat it as "the way" and you're in trouble.

For me, I was very excited to try online dating and would go online everyday to find new connections. After reading this book, I realized online dating is not a quick and easy way to find the love of my life (like eharmony advertises), but it is more of a long haul and it requires more work than I thought. This book really helped me realize that I needed to work at online dating much like real world dating.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
As a Dating and Relationship expert and coach, I make a point of reading a lot, and I mean a lot of dating and relationship books. "Online Dating for Dummies," is really good. It's another great rock solid book from the fantastic "For Dummies" series of books from Wiley.

Singles who are super sophisticated from certain metro areas like Seattle, LA, New York, and San Francisco might turn up their noses at the section which talks about what kind of computer needs you will have. However, when leading a Seminar in Las Vegas with daters who are less technologically savvy than the tech elite, indeed, some don't even have a computer at home. What I so appreciate in the "For Dummies" series is how thorough they are about covering at topic and indeed addressing it as "A Reference for the Rest of Us!"

What is so unique and marvelous about OLD4D is that the co-authors are a now-married couple who, yes, met each other via internet dating. Now, yes, the book came out in 2003. And certain tips and tactics of online dating seem to change every 6-18 months. So will every single word of this book still pertain to internet dating now? No. Is this still an excellent book with page upon page of useful and relevant information pertinent for current online dating? YES!

Throughout the book, Silverstein and Lasky provide their female perspective and male perspective on, everything, and I mean everything including a full (tastefully addressed, still retaining a PG13 rating)chapter devoted to Sex. Their providing their Female/Male personal perspectives is part of what makes OLD4D unique and engaging.

OLD4D is chock full of step-by-step instructions about going online, remaining safe, and pursuing internet love that it is completely worth your time and money and get a copy, read it, and implement it.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
on August 5, 2012
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
With a copywrite date of 2004, this book is outdated for someone looking to start internet dating in the year 2012. Eight years of advancements in electronics and internet connectivity leave this "how to" guide in need of a serious update. Some of the most popular internet dating sites in 2012 are not even mentioned in this book simply because they didn't exist when this book was published.

On the plus side, the book is full of good advice and real world experiences from the two authers who both did the internet dating thing when it was still relatively new and untried. If you know absolutely nothing about a computer, email, chat rooms and other types of social sites on the world wide web, then this book will be a good investment for you. If you consider yourself technically savy and comfortable with all things related to the internet, you may find yourself skipping entire chapters but the book is still worth the read for all the practical advice it offers from both a male and female perspective.

Overall the book was a quick read as are all the books in the "for dummies" series. It's a bit basic for someone who is already comfortable with the internet but it does cover all the basics. It needs updated to reflect internet dating in the year 2012 but I am glad I read it.
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful
on July 3, 2009
Format: Paperback
The book is well put together as all the "Dummies" guides are, but assumes the reader has barely laid hands on a computer before. As a consequence of that, several chapters are taken up explaining things like "you need a PC, a mac will do". I guess that is partly because it was written in 2003/4 though, so we will forgive it that.

An entry on page 68 entitled: "Steering clear of those e-mail order brides" bugged me a bit. Having thoroughly researched the "e-mail order bride" arena, I thought their comments that "these sites border on scams" and more, to be wholly inaccurate and very misleading. Rather than dismiss all Eastern European and Russian women in a few paragraphs as they did, far better to explain that the book is unable to cover such a large side topic in much detail, and steer those interested toward specialist books catering to that genre, such as Russian Bride Guide.

Chapter 6 covers the big known dating sites like Yahoo, Match, Lavalife, etc. We all know about those, but there are some handy tips in there.

Assuming you know your away around a computer already, know how to set a email address up, and all the mundane stuff like "how to find an internet provider", you can safely start reading at Part III (page 91) as all what goes before will be of no use to you.

On the whole, there is nothing earth-shattering you will read here, but it is worthy of a read nonetheless if you can get it inexpensively. I will be investigating other similar books written more recently though. The five years since this was written is a long time in the internet dating world.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
The authors, who met each other through online dating, encourage a positive sense of adventure while guiding newbies through the basics of online dating. There is guidance for every detail of getting setup in an online service. There are especially good chapters on how to handle sex online, e-mail etiquette, and safety tips to consider when meeting people. The authors point out that unhealthy experience can happen, but they emphasize that most experiences are positive when common-sense precautions are taken. They recommend taking a long time with e-mail as the best way to get to know people before moving on to telephone or in-person contact because, they say, it is easier to get more personal and even intimate in thoughtful e-mails than it is in more direct personal contact.

As a veteran of online dating, I thought this book would bore me, but I was wrong. It is very entertaining, especially when the authors speak in their own separate voices and disagree with each other. They say their guidance is based on hundreds of interviews with online daters as well as their own personal experience which culminated in a long-distance romance. If you want advice that is practical and very readable, this book is for you.

Gordon Scott Edwards, author of Internet Safari, Finding Love Online At 65
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
on July 16, 2010
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
My dermatologist wrote this book!! Imagine my surprise when I was book shopping and saw this! She actually wrote it with her husband whom she met on an online dating site, so THAT'S pretty cool. Unfortunately for me she cut back her hours at her practice and I hardly got to see her anymore1 :(

This book is great for people who are new to on-line dating. It covers everything from how to write an effective ad to how to arrange your first meetings. And it's nice that is was written by people that have been there!

Now, Dr.Silverstein....about that Botox!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
on November 27, 2012
Format: Paperback
Several months ago I decided to try online dating so, naturally, I picked up this book. It was interesting reading but even I, dummy that I am about these things, realized that the world has come a long way since this was written. Still, it gives some good tips on basic stuff.
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2 of 3 people found the following review helpful
on June 30, 2008
Format: Paperback
My reviews always air on the side of benefit of the doubt to the author. I thought this book was an easy read and had some basic common sense tips about dating online. One thing she emphasized was having a pic and safety, two important concepts.

Many other common sense tips as well. One thing I noticed in the book that I wasn't thrilled about, she says if you are not happy in a date, then go to the bathroom and call a friend to show up and pretend you didn't realize they were coming. ( well you still would not break a date if you were happy). Another tip, tell them you have to go home to take care of your kids... " just make sure you have kids" etc.

I believe that 99.9% of people do not want to be lied to. If you are not happy and not miserable, why not cut the date short, but be polite. Such as I need to get going in the next 10 minutes. I have some work/laundry ( or whatever honestly) there is.

She says never go for dinner on the first date. Well some enjoy dinner even with someone new. She says it can be like a 90 minute prison. I don't agree. I feel unless a person is acting out of line that you can learn new things about someone and you can even help put a smile on someones face even if you aren't interested in dating them. Bottom line: Treat the other the way you would want to be treated, no need to stay hours longer if you are not happy, and no need to make b.s exuses, polite honesty is what everyone likes.

You wouldn't leave a sales call after 2 minutes if you didn't like the person's hair or voice, so treat a date as you would a sales call, be polite be honest and be nice, try to make the experience a good one for both even if you are not compatable, you may have made someone's day and you are a better person for that. Good luck with dating, and remember, be polite, be fair and be kind, you will be much happier and more respected and loved for it.
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