Customer Reviews

The Only Bush I Trust Is My Own

5 star:		(9)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(4)

 

 

I read this in its entirety one night in an airport while my flight was delayed. I'll assume some literary agent was impressed with what a free-spirited opinionated character Aschenbrand was, and offered her a book deal. The result is mildly entertaining - but an awful lot like reading a blog. It doesn't say much, uses amateurish style, and only occasionally makes you laugh. (I dig the cover, however)

Periel Aschenbrand, The Only Bush I Trust Is My Own (Tarcher, 2005)

With all the good advance press this book got and the initial rave reviews, I'm not sure what I was expecting. Actually, I am; I was expecting this book to be funny.

Tarcher's back-cover copy describes Aschenbrand's debut (which sits somewhere between memoir and attempted standup) as "raunchy and hilarious," when in fact it's neither. There's a very, very big difference between "raunchy" and "obscenity for obscenity's sake." I've never been one to use the old saw about using profanity when you have nothing better to say, but it really does seem to apply here. It's not in the least offensive or shocking (or even amusing, as "raunchy" would tend to imply)m it's just there, taking up space, as if Aschenbrand had a word quota and couldn't find another way to fill it up. As for the humor part, I'm going to guess that some of this is wildly funny if you've been up all night drinking cheap tequila and telling dead baby jokes, but in the cold light of sobriety, I kept waiting for a single chuckle. (I admit, I did find one roundabout page forty-eight.)

I really can't come up with a better word than "awful." (zero)

My husband bought this book for me, presumably because he thought it was a humorous political commentary. In fact, this waste of paper and ink now sits in the trash bin. I couldn't make it to the third chapter before feeling like taking a shower. In very short order, I realized this author is not someone I could spend five minutes without feeling like slapping her. She's self-absorbed and writes in immature mall-rat language. This book is a collosal waste of time and seriously misses the humor mark.

She is no J.D. Salinger, that's for sure.

I saw this book at a bookstore and was immediately intrigued by the provocative cover. In particular, I thought the woman on the cover had the most incredible hair I've ever seen. If I'm not mistaken, the woman on the cover is, in fact, the author Ms. Aschenbrand. I read a few paragraphs of one of the chapters and decided to take a break from my reading of "classics" and read something fun and new instead.

This book is new, and it was somewhat fun. Aschenbrand clearly takes delight in playing the naughty little Jewish stereotype from Queens; and it is for this reason that the book disappointed me. After page three you get into the rhythm of her style of humor, and every word she utters from then on is totally predictable. The word "f..k'n" must appear over a thousand times in this book; it is her primary, if not only, adjective.

I kept waiting for a story to emerge here; folks, there is absolutely no story in this two-hundred-page book. It is merely random musings and anecdotes about the life and adventures of Ms. Aschenbrand. There are the predictable sexual adventures, the assorted men (and women) in her life, the classic conversations with her traditional Jewish mom. There is no cohesive method to the madness, just zig-zagging madness.

Is she funny? Yes, I did laugh quite a bit, but not side-splitting laughter. Maybe I should say I smiled a lot. She is definitely a precocious little wild cat. Unfortunately, she did an extended riff about defecation which conceptually marred the book. (Her other assorted riffs were much more meritorious and appealing.) Aschenbrand thinks we're too uptight about that subject (sh..ting) as a society, and so she decided to set us straight with some anecdotes about her gay friend, a feces-filled bathtub, and a little episode she had involving her proctologist. My opinion is that people divert from these "potty" discussions because they are essentially vulgar. And, in my opinion, feces is not even remotely "interesting," a criterion of much import to the author. (She broadly proclaims various subjects "interesting" or not--and mostly she is right.) However, it is not from lack of moral or intellectual courage that people generally avoid gravitating toward disgusting subject matter. Aschenbrand seems to see herself as a pioneer of sorts in breaking down feces-related barriers in Western society. She expends her efforts pointlessly, in my view; there is little to be gained in terms of adding to the "marketplace of ideas" by talking about...human excrement. Exploring vulgar subject matter does not make a person a leader in breaking down unjust societal taboos; often you merely just get dismissed as being...vulgar, and nothing more.

Perhaps the best thing I can say about my reaction to the book: By the end of it I really did end up liking Periel Aschenbrand. Not as a writer, but as a personality. She is like a playful and naughty little kitten that loves getting a reaction out of you by attacking your foot. Pesky, predictable, cliche....but kind of cute and endearing anyway.

Aschenbrand has a clothing line ("body as billboard") which she generously mentions in this book; she definitely gets off on the idea of sending a message, and apparently her clothing line conveys important messages in bold, artful lettering, rather than corporate logos and brand-names. O-kay...my life is now really altered for the better. That her messages are a little on the vapid side is beside the point; it is kind of fun watching her have so much fun digressing and ranting on nonsense. I actually can see her as more of a stand-up comic than a writer of any lasting significance.

Aschenbrand's stand-up comedy reaction to my review: "What f..k'in idiot would buy a book based on the fact that he liked the author's hair??" Fair question. But, her hair really is f...k'in amazing. And her book was some fun also, so I have no complaints.

I would love to know who recommended this to me so I never listen to her again! It was awful! Too bad there isn't a 0-star rating available!

The interesting title made me want to read it. I got exactly what I expected. I laughed alot because Periel is a liberal, angry, and self-righteous feminist who decided the world should hear what she thinks. Well good for her. I could have stopped reading but I didn't because the book is interesting. It's interesting to have a one-sided conversation with a person who is a liberal, angry, and self-righteous feminist about how she created an anti-Bush t-shirt and sold a few of them to fellow feminists. She writes like she talks, simple and conversational. It's just a little book from a girl who wants to express her views and make some people mad in the process. Almost like an extended blog or short story by a person that isn't a typical stereotypical American woman.

Very curious to the tittle of the book, and little excerpt I read online. To my surprise, I actualy read the entire book, hoping to find the GOOD part. Didnt find it. Mostly rambles about misc. crap from jews to lesbians to family. Did not feel satisfied, waste of time.

The book reads as if a 13 year old is doing everything they can to get a rise out of their parents in order to be able to write about their reactions. And lets face it, anyone can tell sensationlist stories and write a book abou it. But she's not a adolescent she's 29! Miss thang just needs to grow up and respect herself and her family. John Kerry and Bill Clinton would be ashamed to have her as a daughter.

This is truly less of a political work than it is a glittering expression of a smart, savvy, sartorial professional New York gal who obviously speaks her mind first, last and always. And her editors have had the good sense to ensure that her "voice" is translated into some of the wittiest writing I've ever read.

Regardless of your political POV, you don't need a bush to enjoy this wonderful can't-put-down book. I literally devoured it in a single sitting, only putting it down long enough to laugh out loud. It is THAT funny. And it would be even funnier if it weren't so tragically accurate about the state of our society.

Please God, don't let author Aschenbrand become a victim of her own intuition and certain success...we need her voice to remain unadulterated!

If you're an uptight neurotic, you will hate it but be compelled to continue turning every page. If you read it with even only a somewhat open mind, you will treasure it and want to pass it on.

Run to the bookstore or click on something fast and buy this little gem!

This is one of my all-time favorite books! Periel is witty, clever, and thoroughly engaging. Obscenity is part of her character and I think the book would be the lesser without it. However, if you are squemish about sex and four-letter words, you'll have a hard time getting through this book. I would still implore you, though, to give it a chance. She has some wonderful commentary on life, love and politics -- and mothers. Even if you disagree with her, maybe you'll learn something new from her perspective. As you read through the book, you'll learn as well, despite her self-admitted Princess attitude, she has a great deal of concern for certain causes (e.g., women's issues, education/development of youth). Give her and the book a shot -- it isn't all bitchy egomania. It is a quick read; definitely worth the investment of your time.