Conner McDermottEver hear the expression "damned if you do, damned if you don't"? It's the dilemma of being repulsed by something and attracted to it at the same time.
Like with coffee. People drink it for the taste, the buzz, the sensation of holding a warm mug in their chubby little hands, or even because sipping the stuff makes them feel intellectual. Some people can't even begin their days without it.
But then there's the downside. Caffeine headaches when they don't get enough; yellowed teeth if they drink too much. It's a turn-on and an aggravation all at once.
Sort of like Elizabeth Wakefield.
Elizabeth WakefieldIf a guy kisses you and then runs away, is that good or bad? It could mean he thinks it was a mistake and wants to forget it ever happened. Then again, maybe he was so blown away by the kiss that he didn't know what else to do. I'm hoping for number two, but Conner is so hard to read that I have no way of knowing. So the next question is, do I ask him about it?
Jeremy AamesI've only known Jessica Wakefield for two days, but I can't stop thinking about her. She's intelligent, totally beautiful, and so fun to be with that she actually makes me forget the rest of my life is falling apart--it's like she's so full of energy that it's contagious. But she has a quiet side too. There's something; vulnerable about her that makes me want to get to know her even more. I guess the only thing to do is ask her out. Of course, first I have to find her and figure out why she ran off so suddenly this afternoon.
Let's just hope it wasn't because I repulse her.
Jessica Wakefield
Sucky Things That Have Happened to Me Lately Lila and Melissa told Jeremy that I'm the slut of SVH. I took off before I actually heard them, but they must have. Restraint isn't exactly one of their strong points.
Elizabeth got me fired from Healthy because she decided to be irresponsible for the first time in her perfect existence. She was supposed to work my shift, but she never showed, so now I'm jobless.
I talked to Coach Laufeld after the game--she called to let me know she's benching me for the next game. Then she informed me that (surprise!) I'm not captain of the squad anymore. Not that I expected to be anything after missing the pep rally, but I was still hoping. On the bright side--if you can call it that--Tia was named captain instead of Melissa, which should make things a little more bearable. I hope.
It's Saturday night, but instead of having a date (social lepers don't get many offers, you know) I'm stuck at the Fowlers' with nothing to do but watch crappy TV with my parents. I'll probably just end up doing homework, which reminds me:
I have a huge project for drama class due next week, and I don't have the slightest clue where to start.
Did I mention that my life sucks?
Will held Melissa close and swayed back and forth. He nuzzled his face into her soft, chestnut brown hair, inhaling the familiar scent of her apple-blossom shampoo with each breath.
"It's going to be okay, you know," Will murmured as he moved his hand in large, slow circles on her back. But even as he said the words, he couldn't help wondering if he was telling the truth. He knew Melissa was going to need some time to recover from this blow. Her heart had been set on being captain of the cheerleading squad. It was all she'd talked about for weeks. And now it was like the earth had fallen out from beneath her feet.
Melissa pulled away and walked over to the car. She boosted herself onto the hood, her arms at her sides and her entire body slumping heavily. She was still wearing her cheerleading uniform, and it somehow made her look even more frail. Slowly she lifted her head to look at him.
"But it's not okay, Will. Don't you see?" Melissa said, her voice little more than a whisper. "This is our senior year. You're first-string quarterback, and I was supposed to be the cheerleading captain, but now I have to sit back while Tia Ramirez runs the squad. Tia," she repeated, her voice trembling. "Tie would never even have been
considered for captain if we were still at El Carro." She stared at him, the tears welling up again.
Will walked closer, his feet stirring up tiny grains of sand that had found their way onto the paved parking lot. In the moonlight he could see the moistness reflected around Melissa's swollen eyes the result of nearly two hours of crying. He touched her face gently with his thumb, wiping away a few stray tears. Her skin was as cold as it was pale.
Will took off his new Sweet Valley High football jacket and draped it around her shoulders. Melissa's features softened slightly. She tugged at the jacket's collar, pulling it tightly around herself. Will had seen Melissa this way many times, and he'd always stood by her. That was just part of being her boyfriend. He tried to tell himself that it would be that way in any relationship, but somehow he knew that life with Melissa was more dramatic than it would be with other girls. Over the years he had learned to accept that.
"Are you all right?" he asked.
"I guess," Melissa responded.
She dabbed at her eyes and nose with a tissue she'd pulled from her bag earlier. Then she crumpled it up and put her hands back under her legs. She stared up at Will, her pale blue eyes so large and vulnerable that he wished he could scoop her up and hold her in his arms forever. He wanted to protect her from all of the pain in the world--the pain that always seemed to surround her.
"Thanks for hanging out with me," she said quietly.
Her grateful tone caused a pang in Will's heart, and he was suddenly overcome with guilt. What if he had followed through with his original plan to break up with her tonight? To leave her so that he would be free to date Jessica Wakefield.
Jessica. Beautiful, lighthearted Jessica. He had to push his thoughts of her aside. There was no way he could leave Melissa now. She would never get through this alone. She needed him, and Will liked to be needed.
"I know it's not fair, Liss," he said, putting his arms around her again. "I really do. I know how much you wanted to be captain, and you deserved it. Way more than Tia." He held her close and kissed her head lightly. "Or anyone else," he added as an afterthought, knowing that his dismissal of Jessica would make her feel more secure.
But Melissa wasn't done crying yet. She brought her hands to her face, and her whole body began to shake. Will pulled her even closer, enveloping her in his strong arms and resting his chin on her head.
"Go ahead and cry, Liss," he said quietly, staring at the rough surf in the distance. "I'm here for you, and I'm not going anywhere."
"Hello, Aames? Anyone in there?"
Jeremy Aames started at the sound of a familiar voice. It was Corey Scott, one of his coworkers at House of Java.
"Snap out of it, daydream boy, Corey ordered, with attitude to spare.
"Sorry," Jeremy apologized, turning to face her black-rimmed eyes and dyed black hair. "Did you say something?"
Corey narrowed her eyes. "Only about ten times, but don't worry about it. I'm sure you were thinking about something
really important--like football."
Jeremy wasn't in the mood for Corey's sarcasm. Unfortunately she had nailed him--he had been thinking about that day's game. He was the captain of Big Mesa High's football team, and he'd just led his squad in a gloryless loss against Sweet Valley High.
Then, instead of joining his friends over a few pizzas to commiserate, he'd had to come to work as usual. It had been a long time since Jeremy had been able to participate in the bonding ritual that took place off the football field. That was just the way it had to be. For now.
Jeremy looked at Corey, who was staring at him with her arms folded across her chest.
"So what exactly did you say?" he asked in as level a tone as he could manage. Corey rolled her eyes and sighed.
"I said I think I can handle this massive crowd for a while if you want to take your break," she offered, gesturing at the nearly empty café.
"Oh, thanks." Jeremy untied the strings on his green apron. He saw Corey start to open her mouth, so he quickly ducked into the back room before she could let another derisive comment fly.
Jeremy threw his apron over a chair and plopped down on the beat-up maroon couch. His manager, Ally Scott, Corey's more normal sister, had finally given in and set up an area in the back room where the staff could hang out or eat during breaks. Of course, she hadn't wanted to spend much money, so the "area" consisted of an old couch, an even older chair, and a table holding a bunch of out-of-date magazines and a Princess phone. The rest of the room was lined with stock shelves and contained another small area with a desk that served as Ally's office.
Jeremy leaned forward and pulled the phone over from the opposite side of the table. He dialed Jessica Wakefield's number and almost crossed his fingers for luck.
"Don't be mad at me," Jeremy whispered. "Just don't be mad at
me." Jessica had run off so suddenly when he had seen her earlier that afternoon, he'd spent most of the rest of the day wondering if he'd somehow offended her.
"Hello?"
Jeremy's heart skipped a beat at the sound of a young female voice, but then he realized it was too high-pitched to be Jessica's.
"Hi, this is Jeremy Aames. May I speak with Jessica, please?" he said automatically. Then he grimaced. His friends always teased him for being so polit...
