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Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships Audio CD – Audiobook, CD, Unabridged

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Editorial Reviews


"This is the book you want to read if you're looking for a voice that is balanced, sensitive and sensible when tackling the thorny question of sexual boundaries in love relationships. Opening Up is sure to open up your mind." ---Esther Perel, author of Mating in Captivity

About the Author

Tristan Taormino is an award-winning author, columnist, editor, and educator who has been featured in publications including the New York Times and Entertainment Weekly.

Jo Anna Perrin (JP Perrin) is a New York�based actor, photographer, and writer. She has appeared in film and television, as well as on stage in New York, Los Angeles, and regionally. Jo Anna has narrated numerous audiobooks for major publishers, small independent press, and American and foreign university publishers.

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Product Details

  • Audio CD
  • Publisher: Tantor Audio; Unabridged CD edition (September 30, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1452604630
  • ISBN-13: 978-1452604633
  • Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 1.1 x 5.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (124 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #7,110,855 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Tristan Taormino is an award-winning author, sex educator, speaker, filmmaker, and radio host. She is the author of seven books, including The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women, Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships, The Secrets of Great G-Spot Orgasms and Female Ejaculation, The Big Book of Sex Toys, and True List: Adventures in Sex, Porn and Perversion. She is the editor of more than 25 anthologies including The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge and Take Me There: Trans and Genderqueer Erotica, winner of a 2012 Lambda Literary Award. She was creator and series editor of the Best Lesbian Erotica anthology series. Her books have sold over 500,000 copies and been translated into many languages. She's written for a multitude of publications from Yale Journal of Law and Feminism to Penthouse, and served as editor of the magazine On Our Backs. She was a syndicated columnist for The Village Voice for nine and a half years and writes an advice column for Taboo Magazine.

She is the producer and host of Sex Out Loud, a weekly radio show on the VoiceAmerica Network. As the head of Smart Ass Productions, she has directed and produced twenty-four sex education and erotic films; she is currently an exclusive director for Vivid Entertainment. Her films have won more than a dozen awards. Tristan and her work have been featured in over 400 publications including O: The Oprah Magazine, The New York Times, Redbook, Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Entertainment Weekly, Details, New York Magazine, Men's Health, and Playboy. She has appeared on HBO's Real Sex, The Howard Stern Show, Melissa Harris-Perry, Loveline, MTV, CNN, NBC, MTV, Oxygen, Fox News, The Discovery Channel, and on over a hundred radio shows; she was the resident sex expert and a recurring guest on two seasons of Ricki Lake.

Tristan's work, writing and films are routinely used in college courses to explore the complex issues of relationship and sexual diversity, politics and media. As a speaker, she is widely regarded as an expert on a diverse range of topics from sexual empowerment and LGBTQ sexuality to non-monogamy and feminist pornography. She lectures at top colleges and universities including Yale, Cornell, Princeton, Brown, Harvard, Columbia, Smith, Johns Hopkins, and UCLA, where she speaks on gay and lesbian issues, sexuality and gender, and feminism. She teaches sex and relationship workshops around the world.

Customer Reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

266 of 271 people found the following review helpful By Dan E. Nicholas on January 15, 2010
Format: Paperback
I bought this book after running into several folks over a ten year period that were into polyamory--having more than one lover at a time.

To be honest, I was half way between fear and weariness in my emotional take on this book. Fear? I was and am monogamous so fear for sure; but weary of judging my two or three friends who were oriented this way with multiple lovers. I felt their honesty and candor and approach to sexual integrity was scoring far better than mine. Not to mention more often! Yes, finding more integrity in their relationships than many of my church friends, some of whom were defending to the death their long dead marriages; lifeless, dry, sexless "relationships".

With Taormino's interviews of 100 plus folks in alternative relationships, a few things stood out for me as a traditional type married and sometimes churchy guy. All of us could learn a good deal from Tristan's book here on the matter of communication and honesty. I've learned from this title what a joy it is, for example, to have permission from a spouse to notice hot ladies in the street or market. And to have talked out before such events just where the jealousy thing begins and ends and to simply be able to feel free as a man to appreciate the life force around me. Yes, feel good.

Relationship with self? Yes, important. I decided to come out erotically with my thoughts yet with the blessing of my monogamous spouse. Communication and honesty! Saying out loud who you are and what you want, what you desire. That's what this book was about for me.

Opening Up will open up a few closed minds. This doesn't have to mean that if you are into traditional marriage that you have to dial down your commitment to monogamy or start groping ladies in elevators.
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138 of 139 people found the following review helpful By Harper J. Tobin on July 2, 2008
Format: Paperback
A number of good and okay books on nonmonogamy and polyamory have been published in the last several years. I read most of them: some were focused on particular forms of nonmonogamy; others dominated by a spiritual bent, others were just poorly written or edited. Some were downright Pollyanna-ish in their superficial treatment of the challenges of open relationships, occasionally reeking of smug superiority over less-evolved monogamous couplings. None of them was the perfect book I wanted to recommend to the curious, the novice, the baffled and disapproving. This is that book.

Among the book's chief strengths is its breadth. Taormino conducted over 120 interviews with a diverse sample of the nonmonogamous - people of varying ages, sexualities, and (most of all) approaches to relationships. This variety is highlighted by six chapters on different types of open relationships, discussing each types particular advantages and challenges and sharing the experiences of individuals, couples, and group relationships.

The later chapters tackle particular issues and problems common to open relationships, from the emotional (managing jealousy, coming out) to the practical (safer sex, legal and financial protections). Taormino moves beyond the platitudes common to discussions of nomonogamy - "Communicate! Be Honest! Own your feelings!" - and provides concrete advice on how to approach difficult conversations, disentangle emotional reactions, develop and follow agreements, and respond to change.

The book's heavy use of quotations and anecdotes from interview subjects, and its effort to be accessible and inclusive, result in an approach that mutes the distinctive voice and focus on sexual exploration that mark Taormino's other work as an author, editor, educator and pornographer.
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53 of 54 people found the following review helpful By Mistress D on June 28, 2008
Format: Paperback
Tristan Taormino has done it again. Her flair for intelligent, engaging journalism takes a hotly debated subject and demystifies it in a pragmatic, yet charming manner. As a relationship counselor, specializing in alternative affairs, I have, by this time, given all of my initial order copies of Opening Up to clients and friends. This easy to read primer holds priceless value to anyone involved in an intimate liaison and is not only for those in or contemplating open relationships. Taormino's talent for translating thorough research into entertaining reading is made even more beneficial through her use of checklists, guides, definitions and practical advice on etiquette, negotiation and more. What could have easily been just another boring, clinical look at alternative relationship models is presented in a vividly human way and accentuated via the many personal experiences which can be found throughout the book. By shattering countless misconceptions, fabrications, myths and rumors about open relationships, Taormino also brings to light the fact that monogamy is a choice and not an expectation. As well, this delightfully honest author clearly communicates her deep understanding that there is no "right" model. Opening Up vividly illustrates, through tireless research, skillful writing and real life accounts, that all manner of relationships require periodic reevaluation highlighted by meaningful, sincere communication and negotiation in a fearless, loving environment. In her inimitable style, Taormino gently urges the reader to awareness that these are key elements for success in relationships of any kind.Read more ›
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