Our Looks/Our Lives: Sex, Beauty, Power, and the Need to Be Seen [Mass Market Paperback]

Nancy Friday (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 5, 1999

Do You Like What You See In The Mirror?

We all want to have it. Beauty. Today more than ever, our physical appearance determines how we judge ourselves and are judged by others. Like it or not, we live in the age of the Empty Package, when how we look takes precedence over such enduring qualities as integrity, kindness, and honesty. Now, in this provacative, entertaining book, the acclaimed author of the international bestseller My Mother/My Self reveals the truth about how looks affect our lives, and how life affects our looks.

In this thoroughly honest and upbeat book, Nancy Friday probes the power, allure, and mystique of beauty including: fashion, fear of competition, shoes and sex, adolescent pain, envy, the double standard of aging, fairy tales, feminism, love, and more. Part memoir, part history, Our Looks, Our Lives will forever change the way we all look in the mirror.

Editorial Reviews

Review

"A pull-yourself-up-by-your-pumps manifesto." -- Boston Globe

"A thorough explanation of the meaning of beauty." -- --Time

"Challenging, thought-provoking...[a] fascinating psychological study of beauty." -- --Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

"Enormously fun to read." -- --New York Times Book Review

"Fascinating...recommended highly." -- --New York Observer

"Likely to linger long in the reader's memory." -- --Seattle Times

"Moving and honest....You've got to love Nancy Friday." -- --People

About the Author

Nancy Friday is the author of seven internationally bestselling books, including My Secret Garden, Forbidden Flowers, Jealousy, Women on Top, and the acclaimed My Mother/My Self. She lives with her husband in Key West and Connecticut.

Product Details

• Mass Market Paperback: 848 pages
• Publisher: HarperTorch (May 5, 1999)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0061097942
• ISBN-13: 978-0061097942
• Product Dimensions: 6.8 x 4.2 x 1.4 inches
• Shipping Weight: 14.6 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 3.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,899,803 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

17 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Heavy going, overly self-indulgent, May 31, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: Our Looks/Our Lives: Sex, Beauty, Power, and the Need to Be Seen (Mass Market Paperback)

I expected to find this interesting, and didn't. Nancy Friday injects far, far too many of her own experiences and attitudes, and expects them to be the norm. She seems to believe that many of the "Good Girl Rules" still apply, citing the fact that most men still hope to marry virgins, etc. Riiiight, and most women would like to marry a millionaire. Ask the British Royal Family about the availability of virgin brides! Any mother of a teenaged boy can tell you, adolescent girls today are often avid, relentless pursuers, and sex with them is pretty much a given, not a mere possibility. Their mothers can be pushy and enthusiastic co-conspirators. There's no social penalty! The world has moved on, however much we may bemoan the fact. This book doesn't ring true for parents who find themselves in the trenches, or for people who know why the latest scandal has become a huge yawn to the general public.

10 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars from a cautious Friday-fan, April 18, 2001

By A Customer

This review is from: Our Looks/Our Lives: Sex, Beauty, Power, and the Need to Be Seen (Mass Market Paperback)

This book explores the psycho-cultural concepts of beauty, jealousy, and sexuality (amongst others). To be quite direct, it's worth the buy, but be skeptical. It is too easy to fall into Nancy Friday's slightly distorted thinking patterns. I think that any good Friday-fan would agree that sometimes, the lady is just not all right in the head. If you have read My Mother/My Self and would like to do some follow-up growth work, this is a good place to start. Friday makes some extremely interesting theories that make a great deal of sense. The only problems with this book are that, like always, Nancy Friday seems to think that her experiences are the norm and every female is the same as her, and that she is way too incoherent with her constant flashbacks to her exhibitionistic youth. All of these flashbacks lead me to believe that, perhaps, she is still expressing her exhibitionistic side through her work to her readers. And we, the "good girls" are going to again accept her and reseal the symbiotic bond (see what an impact My Mother/My Self has made??!!?!?) Well, it's true, anyways. The book is not coherent and can lead you into thinking that everyone is as Nancy Friday describes. BUT, if you are into Friday and liked My Mother/My Self, buy this book. She makes too many good points somewhere in her rambling for you to miss it! It will open your eyes even more--this time more in the way of psychosocial taboos. to sum it all up: if you did not like My Mother/My Self, you certainly won't like this one. If you did like it, you probably will. It is only to those readers that I would recommend this book. With this recommendation I give the suggestion: READ THIS BOOK WITH AN OPEN MIND, BUT NOT SO OPEN THAT YOUR BRAINS FALL OUT!!

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Pass, June 21, 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: Our Looks/Our Lives: Sex, Beauty, Power, and the Need to Be Seen (Mass Market Paperback)

For Nancy Friday fans, this book is perfect, because it is almost all about Nancy Friday. Her theories were interesting, I give anyone credit for having enough to say to write a 777 page book; however, most of her theories are not scientifically supported. Instead her theories are derived and supported from experiences from her unique past. Basically if you were looking for a book that talks about the importance of beauty in our society in terms of anthropology, science or even statistics, do not buy this book, as she concentrates mostly on her own experiences. I would like to sit and have lunch with her, she seems wonderful, but this book just wasn't for me.