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Outing Yourself: How to Come Out as Lesbian or Gay to Your Family, Friends, and Coworkers [Paperback]

Michelangelo Signorile
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (20 customer reviews)

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Book Description

June 6, 1996
No matter how much you prepare, coming out as gay or lesbian is a difficult, emotional process -- a process that will continue long after the words are spoken and the secret is out. There's no magic formula, but Outing Yourself by Michelangelo Signorile offers structure, guidance, and straightforward advice to all those:

WHO ARE STRUGGLING WITH THEIR SEXUALITY AND UNSURE OF WHAT TO DO

WHO HAVE ACCEPTED THAT THEY ARE GAY BUT ARE STILL AFRAID TO COME OUT

WHO CONSIDER THEMSELVES OUT OF THE CLOSET BUT REALIZE THEY HAVE FARTHER TO GO

Signorile's 14-step program -- complete with exercises, meditation notes, and anger checks, as well as the accounts of the coming-out experiences of other lesbians and gay men -- shows how you can successfully handle this life-changing, life-renewing process. A guide for the coming-out journey, Outing Yourself will convince all who read it that, in the words of the author, "The stress of coming out will never be as hard on you as the stress of staying in was."


Frequently Bought Together

Outing Yourself: How to Come Out as Lesbian or Gay to Your Family, Friends, and Coworkers + Is It a Choice? Answers to the Most Frequently Asked Questions About Gay & Lesbian People, Third Edition
Price for both: $24.96

Buy the selected items together


Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Out magazine columnist Signorile presents a 14-step program for gays and lesbians seeking to come to terms with their sexuality.
Copyright 1996 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Library Journal

Controversial journalist Signorile offers a perceptive, practical self-help book on the lifelong process of coming out.
Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 208 pages
  • Publisher: Touchstone; Fireside ed edition (June 6, 1996)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0684826178
  • ISBN-13: 978-0684826172
  • Product Dimensions: 0.5 x 5.4 x 8.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (20 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #347,205 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

It will help you to know when you are ready, and what to make sure you have as a security net. The Doughball  |  3 reviewers made a similar statement
This is the first book that I bought about coming out. DJS  |  1 reviewer made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
38 of 38 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Gay? Read it. Straight? Give it! April 28, 2000
By A Customer
Format:Paperback
When I began coming out, I ended up with two copies of this book--the first two people I came out to gave me copies of this book, and both were straight. If you are straight and someone gay comes out to you early on in their coming-out process and you want to show them that you support them--this is a great book to give. And if you are gay and want helpful, level-headed advice about how and when to come out--this is a great book to get before you begin. Some key things I hadn't realized in coming out that this book touches on, for instance, is that the order you come out to your straight friends matters. Who knew? It's chock full of little tidbits of things you probably never thought about--and viewpoints on things you probably have thought about. All in all, this should be the first title in your gay or lesbian library. I can't tell you how much it helped me.
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31 of 33 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Coming Out Help February 18, 2002
By DJS
Format:Paperback
I recently accepted to myself that yes, I am Gay. My family and most of my friends do not know about me being gay. Many of whom I already think they suspect me of being gay but do not say anything.
I used to be confused about myself and thought that I am bi-sexual. But now I know that it is not the true me. Sure I like to be with girls and hangout but sexually I prefer to be with another man. That being said I will give my thoughts on this wonderful book.

This is the first book that I bought about coming out. This book not only breaks down steps in how to come out but it gives real life examples from other people's coming out stories.
The pace of the book is set at your pace. You continue through the chapters as you progress in your coming out.
Not only does this book answer questions that you might have it also answers questions that your friends and family might have and how to deal with them.
I can say this book is very helpful in understanding not only yourself, but your family, friends, and the gay community.
This book is not only for you, but for everyone in your life.
Though I am not out of the closet to those very close to me, I have made steps in coming out thanks to this book.
I hope you enjoy this book as much as I have.

Was this review helpful to you?
38 of 42 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I found this book to be a veritable Bible of Coming out. When the best time to do it is, how to establish a network of friends as a new "family", etc. But my one caveat for anyone dealing with their own sexuality would be to take all the advice you can stomach, and then formulate your own strategy for coming out. This book, while extremely valuable, is NOT a book of rules - merely suggestions. All of the books on this topic I have read seem to all have the same errored thought process - that just because you are gay, that you have to become an activist. It is important that you come to terms with your sexuality and share or don't share it with your loved ones and coworkers, but I think this book's approach of "coming out every day" may be quite intimidating for any person struggling to come out. You don't have to join GLAAD or march in any parades.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
3.0 out of 5 stars Dated, at least for younger gays
This book was written in 1996, and by 2011, it seems a bit long in the tooth. Thankfully, society has progressed and is much more accepting of gays especially among the younger... Read more
Published on February 14, 2011 by Bitmapped
5.0 out of 5 stars excellent guide - go at your own pace
This book is excellent. I wish I had found it 10 years earlier - it could have saved me a lot of agony. Read more
Published on April 6, 2006 by Linda
1.0 out of 5 stars Don't waste your money
Don't waste your money! To come out, sit your mom, dad, friend, or whomever down somewhere where the two of you can be alone for a few minutes, then just tell them. Read more
Published on January 30, 2005 by M. Flynn
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book
I like the way this book deals with homophobia, with patience and understanding, instead of anger. I wish I'd had this book earlier, before coming out to some of my friends, I... Read more
Published on April 4, 2004
4.0 out of 5 stars Still in!
I found this book extremely helpful...it gave me some good points about who to come out to first and when to come out. Read more
Published on January 8, 2004
3.0 out of 5 stars Helpful, except for the brainwashing
This is a pretty good book for the person starting from ground zero in the coming out process. It's especially good for its advice on the difficult cases, like coming out to... Read more
Published on December 23, 2003 by B. Bartels
2.0 out of 5 stars Shambolic
Hello fellow people. I found this book to be no help whatsoever.
I've read it 4 times and I'm still stuck in this lift. Read more
Published on August 12, 2003 by Jerry Pattison
2.0 out of 5 stars Shambolic
Hello fellow people. I found this book to be no help whatsoever.
I've read it 4 times and I'm still stuck in this lift. Read more
Published on August 12, 2003 by Jerry Pattison
5.0 out of 5 stars Very helpful
This book is terrific, for anyone coming out, already out, or considering coming out in the near future. Read more
Published on July 12, 2002 by The Doughball
5.0 out of 5 stars recommended
it's a hurdle on your path to coming out. you can do it.
Published on January 15, 2001 by scudder26@aol.com
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