Sex Panther 1.7-oz Cologne Spray Non Growl Box
- Sex Panther Cologne 1.7 oz
- Officially Licensed from Anchorman
- 60% of the time, it works every time.
- (actually smells great)
- currently unable to ship outside of US
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Top Customer Reviews
He had saved his money from mowing lawns the entire summer and told me that I was his big bubba and he loved me. I opened the cologne and it's smell lit up my senses in a way that I can not begin to describe.
I wore it to school the next day and noticed that teachers seemed to bend over a lot more in front of me, the girls all seemed to stay near my locker, and the principal called me into his office for a "long talk."
It seems that I have an animal magnetism that can only be explained by the power of this mighty cologne. I have since run out of the cologne and since my mom took away my allowance for molesting a family of badgers(illegal in my county) I have resorted to trying and making my own cologne to wear.
I have tried many things, but most of the time people look at me in disgust and wrinkle their noses as if I am something on the bottom of their shoe that they wish someone had cleaned up before they had stepped in me.
I miss the power that I had over the fairer sex when I wore this cologne. I was the only guy to meet a girl at the movies on Friday, and meeting a girl in this town when they only show a movie twice week? That is a big deal. Usually, we have to make out in the rusted out school park after 11, but the movies you have the cover of darkness to hunt. And that is what I did when I was Sex Panther Johnston. Hunted out the ladies.
Now I cry.
1. Spray Cologne
2. Attract ridiculous amount of women.
3. Make love to them.
For your own safety, do not stand too close to the ladies while enjoying the fine aroma of Sex Panther Cologne.
I was very nervous when I first received this product. Not because of its packaging - because a man in a wolf shirt should never be afraid. But because I didn't know what would happen when I added something as pungent as Sex Panther to my already testosterone maxed wolf wearing self.
Upon first spray, I immediately sprouted a mustache. And then a moustache. I walked out my front door, and before I got to the end of my driveway I had already given one lucky lady a mustache ride. I'm not sure if it was the cologne, my shirt, or the combination of the two, but all other verile males in the area immediately went blind and developed ED.
Aft r tha;t d;
A note from the Reviewer's brother - The Reviewer is no longer capable of continuing his response. Due to the constant bombardment of women, he no longer is able to use his hands for anything other than sex. I would rate this product a five out of five, but since I'm blind and impotent now, I kind of wish I had purchased this product first.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
This was purchased as a gag gift for a friend, but the cologne actually smells quite good. The package does not growl when opened.Published 7 days ago by Patrick D
I bought this as a joke gift for my husband. He loves the movie and thought he'd get a kick out of it. It worked, He did. Read morePublished 13 days ago by K. Kavanaugh
Cologne smells great, very fresh. The boyfriend loved it. Wasn't impressed with the box being very worn , like someone had it in their vehicle everyday being kicked around :/Published 1 month ago by Amazon Customer
great gag-gift for my brother. He and his friends found it extremely funny.Published 2 months ago by Ryan Sharrow