The Paranoid's Pocket Guide: Hundreds of Things You Never Knew You Had to Worry About [Hardcover]

Cameron Tuttle (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: June 1, 1997

Are you worried sick? If not, maybe you should be. Because a pair of drawstring sweatpants could bring about your most embarrassing moment. And a toothpick in your sandwich can be the deadliest of weapons. Including hundreds of bizarre-but-true things that can get you, this compact volume will induce nervous page flipping and make even the most snug and secure folks bonafide paranoiacs. Chilling black and white photographs document the everyday items that menace your safety. But whether it's archibutyrophobia (the fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth) or phobophobia (the fear of fear itself) that eventually gets you, don't be afraid to buy this book. You never know what might happen to you if you don't.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Eccentrically organized, Cameron Tuttle's The Paranoid's Pocket Guide is a cautionary guidebook to take you into the millennium or, at the very least, put your worst fears in perspective. "Fright Bites!" ("In 1996, the Centers for Disease Control reported that it does not have a large enough budget to research all of the emerging pathogens") burst in on thematically arranged sections such as "Militias," "At Home," "Hypochondriac's Alert," and "At The Gym." Do you know that "every year, close to 200 exercisers fall victim to metal seat posts when the seats on their stationary bikes collapse?" More pointedly, do you need to? Lightning, in Tuttle's total scheme, glitters through the book as a significant leitmotif. It's entertaining, but probably not the best book to read on a long airplane ride.

Review

Paranoia is proof that one is aware. New York Times Magazine

Reviews From:

The New York Times Magazine

Plazm

From: The New York Times Magazine

Questions for Cameron Tuttle, the author of The Paranoid's Pocket Guide

You recommend "niche worrying." What is it?
A: Niche worrying is a means of conveniently organizing one's paranoia. It's concentrating at an appropriate time, like focussing on getting Legionnaires' disease from inhaling steam containing Legionella pneumophila bacteria while taking a shower at the gym.

Q: What are your sources?
A: Television, newspaper and the Centers for Disease Control. And ads -- like those for the Club, possibly the world's most paranoid product. Advertising, after all, preys off our collective paranoia to sell "cures" and "protection."

Q: Is paranoia healthy?
A: I believe so. Think about what adds up to paranoia: information plus imagination. In my book, I include a factoid on insurance policies offering coverage for destruction by satellite. Only an active and alert mind will draw the conclusion that their property is in actual danger. Paranoia is proof that one is aware.

By Jack Harris

A gimmick book, "to help you worry more efficiently." If you have a propensity to worry a lot, this collection of factoids might lend some credence to your condition. It is arranged in short paragraphs and lists with comments in the margins. "The IRS has more employees than the FBI or any other law enforcement agency" then "What are they really doing?" as an aside. A good question, one that has occurred to most of us without the benefit of this guide.

Along the bottom of each page is a sort of first person worry-wart stream of consciousness rant running a spectrum of concerns from the mundane (did I leave the iron on?) to the exotic (there's a tapeworm inside of me) the truly paranoid (angry adolescent spitting in my fast-food) to the self-fulfilling prophesy (I'll be left at the altar). With this attitude, you will lose sleep (the paranoids are out to get me).

Some of the blurbs are eye-opening. "According to the Federal Aviation Administration, 13% of the commercial airline pilots tested positive for alcohol or drugs while on duty," Others are obvious, "Thirty-four percent of hunting deaths and injuries are self-inflicted." Nowhere in this book are the sources documented or footnoted which is what dooms it to the novelty category.

It might go well if the person could flip through a few pages for a baffled grin. One with slower bowels could conceivably push through the whole book in a sitting, with the caution: "One in 6,500 Americans will be injured by a toilet seat during their lifetime. Most will be men."

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 144 pages
• Publisher: Chronicle Books (June 1, 1997)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0811816656
• ISBN-13: 978-0811816656
• Product Dimensions: 6.5 x 4.3 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 4.8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #423,079 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Cameron Tuttle is known for her wit, humor, and books with pink covers. The author of the bestselling Bad Girl's Guides, she is now working on the third novel in a Young Adult series that began with "Paisley Hanover Acts Out," published in 2009.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious, but spooky. Genius., July 18, 2003

By 

Sannah Zay "suncat23" (San Jose, CA USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Paranoid's Pocket Guide: Hundreds of Things You Never Knew You Had to Worry About (Hardcover)

This book sits in a conspicuous semi-hidden drawer in my living room coffee table. I'm always hoping someone will open the drawer and start reading it... I think they would become completely engrossed, but would also start looking out the corner of their eyes for what might get them! Some of MY friends might break out in a cold sweat, throw down the book and go running out the door!

The pages of the book are multi-dimensional... it is designed to "trip you out." The little factoids come in fonts of multiple sizes, which is not really similar to ransom notes clipped from newspapers but elicits the same type of feeling. One of the best things about the book are the photos... even everyday objects like sponges and treadmills are made to look like fearsome devices of evil... and the captions to the pictures help. Offset well below the image as if to stand it's distance, the caption speaks out as if to whisper the name of the object in the simplest possible way: [ A SPONGE ]. Heh.

There is also what appears to be the ramblings of a hyper-paranoid person scrawled along the bottom of the pages. You have to read the book twice... once to follow that rambling from cover to cover, and once to read all the factoids. But when you are reading the factoids, you sometimes get a glimpse of the rambling. The oddness of it adds to the whole creepiness of the book.

The atmosphere of the book is similar in some respects to what a crazed private-eye type, or government agent type, would write.

10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars I will never leave my house again..., November 22, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: The Paranoid's Pocket Guide: Hundreds of Things You Never Knew You Had to Worry About (Hardcover)

...without laughing, reminising about the fact that there is someone more paranoid than me out there. The book was humorous, yet frightening all at the same time. It was the definition of sweet and sour sause...and personally it is now on my shelf of favorite works of literature.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars It was one of the funniest yet scariest books I ever read., June 18, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: The Paranoid's Pocket Guide: Hundreds of Things You Never Knew You Had to Worry About (Hardcover)

It was a great book. There were parts of it that made me laugh and others that made me want to hide under the bed and never come out. It had a great way of tying in stuff that probably would never happen to you ( or would it) with factual stuff. I would definatly recomend buying it. Regardly of how many times you read it, it will still amaze you.