Customer Reviews

Parenting Is a Contact Sport: 8 Ways to Stay Connected to Your Kids for Life

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As a middle school teacher, I have observed just what Dr. Stern suggests: successful parent-child relationships result from a thoughtful openness on the parents' part. I recommend this book not only to parents, but also to educators or anyone who plays a principal role in the life of a child.

After reading Parenting is a Contact Sport, I have the "how tos" that will help me secure and protect a healthy lifelong relationship with my own kids. Dr. Stern offers her sensible and honest parenting philosophy just in time to this brand new mom. Even though conversations with my newborn are fairly one-sided so far, I have shifted my thinking about communicating with our daughter as she grows. Reading this book helped me gain confidence that--with careful, measured attention--good parenting is a process that conscientious moms and dads can make a habit.

Dr. Stern's "Parenting Is A Contact Sport" is a wonderful resource and guide for parents facing any age or stage. When I first picked it up, I thought that maybe it might be more appropriate for parents of older children (I have an almost 2-year-old and another on the way) or teenagers. But, I am so glad that I read this book when I did and would recommend it to other parents of young children - as well as parents of older children and teenagers! Dr. Stern provides a unique perspective on parenting that I found enlightening, and I expect that I will often turn to this book for guidance.

Almost all of the literature that new parents read is so focused on the practical necessities of raising young children - what they should be eating, how to get them to eat vegetables, how much they should be sleeping, when to start potty-training, etc., etc. - because this helps us handle the short-term challenges. But, thinking only in terms of conquering each stage, reaching each milestone, makes this wonderful journey so fleeting. I found Dr. Stern's parenting theory so refreshing in that it both focuses parents on what the end-game really is - close, loving bonds with your children for life - and demonstrates how having that long-term perspective can help guide you through the many challenges you will face as a parent.

Dr. Stern accomplishes this by speaking through her personal experiences as a mother of two daughters - revealing both her successes and the times she felt she came up short - and as a psychotherapist counseling both children, parents, and adults struggling to come to terms with experiences from their own childhoods. The book is rich with wonderful stories that Dr. Stern weaves together to illustrate her theory and show how implementing it in practice can lead to warm, loving lifelong relationships with your children. It is incredibly enjoyable to read.

I am so very glad that I read this book when I did and recommend it very highly to other parents.

I wish I'd had this book to read when my two children were growing up. Reading it now, though, I know there is still time to use it in their adult years. When I'm a grandmother, Joanne's guidance will help me be the one I've dreamed of being. After four reads, I still find so much to consider. Make this book a gift to anyone in your life who has children or is going to be a parent.

As an expectant mother I have been searching for a book that gives practical, easy to read advice on how to connect with your child in early stages as well as throughout the many stages of life. This book gave me solid examples of how to start this process and build a fulfilling relationship with my children. The language the author uses is easy to understand and she punctuates each chapter with personal experiences (both good and bad) that made it very easy to relate to her as mother and individual. I highly recommend this book for anyone looking to start the bonding process (with any aged child) or anyone looking for alternatives or reinforcement for the practices they've already been following.

Though I am not a parent, I read this book because my intuition told me it would help me understand my parents more. And I was right...my father is 89 and my mother is 75, and the overwhelming message I received is that it is never too late to improve a "relationship" between a parent and a child, or actually any relationship for that matter. When I finished the last chapter, I picked up the phone and called my parents to say "I love you." Dr. Stern's engaging and insightful book helped remind me that my parents were learning and growing during my childhood and adolesence, just as much as I was, something the child in all of us should always try to remember.

"Parenting is a Contact Sport" helped me start building a close and respectful relationship with my toddler. The personal stories brought the different parenting successes and pitfalls to life, providing a basic road-map of what is to come as my daughter grows and how to nurture the relationship along the way. I have always feared talking about the scary subjects like drugs, alcohol, and sex, but Dr. Stern's book helped show that general conversations open the door at an early age to more in depth conversations as your child ages.

I look forward to having a wonderful, close relationship with my daughter after using the techniques taught in this book for building a lasting relationship.

Like many first-time parents, I must have read 10 books on what to expect during my pregnancy, but I only realized on the drive home from the hospital that I didn't own one book on parenting. I immediately bought a few "What to Expect" monoliths, but these tend to focus mainly on what my child will experience as she develops; very little is said about how I and my husband can instill in our child a sense of security, confidence, and enjoyment of life. As I expect many parents will be, I was thrilled to come across Joanne Stern's "Parenting is a Contact Sport."

"Parenting is a Contact Sport" fills a very important void in the parenting literature, as it provides the reader with a model or guiding principle for raising confident, honest, and disciplined kids. In essence, Stern's book puts forth the relatively easy-to-understand but much harder-to-implement idea that parenting is essentially an exercise in creating and maintaining open, communicative, and loving relationships with your children. Through anecdotes about raising her own daughters and experiences from her therapy practice, Dr. Stern guides the reader through some of the most difficult aspects of parenting: disciplining your child, setting boundaries, talking about sex and drugs, boosting your child's self-confidence, and letting go when it is time.

Although many of the parenting "issues" the book focuses on relate to the teenage years, Stern makes an excellent case that an open and loving relationship with your child from the earliest age is the single most important input in the complicated formula that is raising a confident, honest, and disciplined child, teenager, or young adult. I got much out of reading "Parenting is a Contact Sport" now (my daughter is only 15 months old), and expect that I will consult Stern's book numerous times over the next 17+ years.

"Parenting is a Contact Sport" should be required reading for all parents (and even soon-to-be parents!) interested in how they can move beyond taking care of their children and focus on raising them to be young adults we can respect and admire.

How long it has been since we, as parents and therapists, landed on a book in the overwhelming "self-help" section that satisfies all of our learning needs. Dr. Stern is eloquent, sensitive and downright practical in how to, at any age, create ways to nurture the connection with our kids. Timing could not be better, for we have been struggling with our 14 yr. old son. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Dr. Dan & Meg Haycraft (LCSW) Chicago, IL.

A most wonderful and personal book that takes you by the hand and guides you through all the difficult moments one might encounter while your children are growing up becoming teenagers and then young adults.

Every chapter of this book is like chatting with your best friend, who just happens to be a PhD filled with education, wisdom, love, and life experience. Dr. Stern's specific examples- both good and bad- give you concrete ideas about parenting choices in many different settings. While this book is appropriate for any stage of parenting, it feels like a life-line when you are crashing into the teenage years, full speed ahead! This book shares stories and ideas, and reads quickly. It does not expound upon lofty theories about parenting, but jumps right into day to day issues. Do yourself (and your kids) a favor and enjoy this delightfully positive book!