Parenting Through Crisis: Helping Kids in Times of Loss, Grief, and Change [Hardcover]

Barbara Coloroso (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 21, 2000

"Suffering is a natural part of life and we cannot eliminate it. What we can eliminate are the things we do to unnecessarily compound our own suffering, and the things we do to unnecessarily cause others to suffer. . . . When we offer our children our time, our affection, and our sense of optimism, we help them find a way through their own adversity, grief, and sorrow. They learn that they too can take an active part in determining what they will do with what life has handed them."-- From Parenting Through Crisis

In this companion to her bestselling kids are worth it! parenting educator Barbara Coloroso shows how parents can help children find a way through grief and sorrow during the difficult times of death, illness, divorce, and other upheavals that strike families or others we care about. She offers concrete, compassionate Ideas for supporting children as they navigate the emotional ups and downs that accompany loss, assisting them in developing their own constructive ways of responding to life's challenges.

At the heart of' her approach is what she calls the T.A.0. of Family--time, Affection, and Optimism--coupled with her deep understanding of how people move through grief. Barbara Coloroso's clear answers to difficult questions are illustrated through Uplifting humor and insightful anecdotes from her own experiences as a franciscan nun, mother of' three,, and her thirty years as a parenting educator and leader of workshops and seminars worldwide. With this guide in hand, parents can feel assured that they are parenting with both head and heart, responding with wisdom and love when children need them most.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Sooner or later, all families are faced with an emergency or two; some families, in fact, are created through crisis. Death, illness, divorce, adoption: these are biggies, and Barbara Coloroso's (Kids Are Worth It!) book Parenting Through Crisis manages to turn these mountains into smaller slopes, if not the proverbial molehills we hope for.

The chapters of this book are arranged by type of crisis--quite helpful if you're looking for information on dealing with adoption and don't feel up to reading how to handle the death of a sibling. Inside each chapter, you'll find specific stages that children of different ages may go through in processing their difficulties, along with helpful parenting techniques, ways of creating a positive dialogue with all family members, and the occasional suggestion for particular legal issues. Pages are sprinkled heavily with appropriate quotes from many sources, and many parents may find a bit of memorization helpful in keeping their tempers. One chapter contains advice from Henry Ford that seems equally appropriate for assembly line or family drama: "Do not find fault, find a remedy." Coloroso encourages open communication at every opportunity, and her expertise in nonviolent conflict resolution shows itself with her suggestions of effective discipline and problem solving that leave blame and punishment in the dust. New language choices are a part of her techniques, and words like "co-parenting" and "primary responsibility" are emphasized instead of old school phrases like "joint" or "sole" custody. Parents in difficult situations should find a few quiet hours to spend with this book--it's not one to be quickly absorbed, but one to be used with planning and patience. --Jill Lightner

About the Author

Barbara Coloroso is the author of the international bestseller Kids Are Worth It! She is an internationally recognized speaker on parenting, teaching, positive school climate, nonviolent conflict resolution and grieving. For the past thirty years, she has enriched the lives of hundreds of thousands through her speeches, seminars, and award-winning audio and video programs. Her uniquely effective parenting strategies were developed over the course of her years of training in sociology, special education, philosophy, and theology, and they have been field-tested through her experience, as a mother of three grown children, classroom teacher, and University instructor. She lives with her husband in Littleton, Colorado.

Product Details

• Hardcover: 272 pages
• Publisher: William Morrow (September 21, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0060198567
• ISBN-13: 978-0060198565
• Product Dimensions: 9.3 x 6 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds
• Average Customer Review: 3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,545,084 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Barbara Coloroso is an international bestselling author and for the past 38 years an internationally recognized speaker and consultant on parenting, teaching, school discipline, positive school climate, bullying, grieving, nonviolent conflict resolution and restorative justice. She has appeared on Oprah, CBS, NBC, ABC, CNN and NPR and has been featured in the New York Times, Time, U.S. News & World Report, Newsweek, and other national and international publications. Her uniquely effective parenting and teaching strategies were developed through her years of training in sociology, special education, and philosophy, as well as field-tested through her experiences as a classroom teacher, laboratory school instructor, university instructor, seminar leader, volunteer in Rwanda, and mother of three grown children. She is the author of four international bestsellers: kids are worth it! Giving Your Child the Gift of Inner Discipline; Parenting Through Crisis--Helping Kids in Times of Loss, Grief and Change; The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander--From Pre-School to High School, How Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle of Violence; and Just Because It's Not Wrong Doesn't Make It Right--From Toddlers to Teens, Teaching Kids to Think and Act Ethically. Barbara's latest book is Extraordinary Evil: A Brief History of Genocide...and Why it Matters. She also has two critically acclaimed video programs Winning at Parenting...without beating your kids and Winning at Teaching...without beating your kids.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

11 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Colorosso Does It Again!, January 24, 2001

By 

Ms Diva "cycworker" (Nanaimo, B.C. Canada) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Parenting Through Crisis: Helping Kids in Times of Loss, Grief, and Change (Hardcover)

In this fantastic follow up to Kids Are Worth It! author Barbara Colorosso discusses how parents can help their children cope with changes like deaths within the family, divorce, remarriage, illness, and disability. The book is peppered with inspiring quotes, humor, and personal stories.

The book gives great suggestions for parents to support their children through difficult times. The author uses what she calls the TAO of Family (Time, Affection and Optimism) as a guide for each of the subjects she discusses. She also reviews information on the three styles of families and the difference between discipline and punishment. She does expand on this by talking about restorative justice, which is very interesting. She does a good job of giving readers a sense of empowerment.

My one minor complaint about the book (in fact, this is the only thing that has kept me from giving it five stars) is that some of the material was repetitive. She looks at each issue from a developmental perspective. She even considers the impact on the unborn in some chapters, which is impressive (I wish she had done so in all chapters). But she could have done one chapter on developmental stages instead, because the impact is quite similar regardless of whether the specific issue is divorce or death. I can't fault her for restating the information about types of families from Kids are Worth It! because that information is so useful it bears restating, and not everyone who reads this book will have read the first one.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars A Good Parenting Book, June 23, 2001

By 

Frances Murphy (Alexandria, Ontario Canada) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Parenting Through Crisis: Helping Kids in Times of Loss, Grief, and Change (Hardcover)

This book is most useful to parents dealing with specific crises. A good reference.

3.0 out of 5 stars Its Okay, May 26, 2009

By 

mommyof2 (MN) - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Parenting Through Crisis: Helping Kids in Times of Loss, Grief, and Change (Paperback)

This is a good book. However, it did not meet my need. I had a specific case of looking for parenting tips on helping a young child who has lost his mother from cancer rather quickly.