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Parenting Without Power Struggles: Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids While Staying Cool, Calm and Connected [Paperback]

Susan Stiffelman
4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (83 customer reviews)


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Book Description

October 1, 2009

Imagine life without drama, meltdowns, and power struggles
From celebrity parents to everyday moms and pops, single parents to grandparents, most of us know what to do when our kids behave. But let's face it: family life can get downright crazy, and it's at those moments that we most need to keep our cool.
Family therapist Susan Stiffelman has shown thousands of parents how to be the cool, confident "Captain of the ship" in their children's lives. Based on her successful practice and packed with real-life stories, Susan shares proven strategies and crystal clear insights to motivate kids to cooperate and connect. Parenting without Power Struggles is an extraordinary guidebook for transforming your day-to-day parenting life.
You'll discover how to:
• Transform frustration and aggression into adaptation and cooperation
• Keep your cool when your kids push your buttons, talk back or refuse to "play nice"
• Nourish deep attachment with young and older kids
• Help your ADD'ish child survive and thrive, even if you’re ADD'ish yourself
• Inoculate your kids from negative thinking and peer pressure that lead to anger, anxiety, depression, or behavior issues
• Help children manage the emotional challenges of divorce



Editorial Reviews

Review

"Susan's work is brilliant. If you buy just one parenting book this year, make it this one!"
Thom Hartmann, author of Healing ADD



"One of the most user-friendly, practical and engaging guides to parenting I've ever come across."
Janet Bray Attwood, co-author of the NY Times bestseller The Passion Test



"A must-read for every parent and grandparent. An exceptional book I will refer to often for assistance in helping all the families we serve."
Maria D'Angelo, founder, Children's Lifesaving Foundation

Book Description

Imagine life without drama, meltdowns, and power struggles
From celebrity parents to everyday moms and pops, single parents to grandparents, most of us know what to do when our kids behave. But let's face it: family life can get downright crazy, and it's at those moments that we most need to keep our cool.
Family therapist Susan Stiffelman has shown thousands of parents how to be the cool, confident "Captain of the ship" in their children's lives. Based on her successful practice and packed with real-life stories, Susan shares proven strategies and crystal clear insights to motivate kids to cooperate and connect. Parenting without Power Struggles is an extraordinary guidebook for transforming your day-to-day parenting life.
You'll discover how to:
• Transform frustration and aggression into adaptation and cooperation
• Keep your cool when your kids push your buttons, talk back or refuse to "play nice"
• Nourish deep attachment with young and older kids
• Help your ADD'ish child survive and thrive, even if you’re ADD'ish yourself
• Inoculate your kids from negative thinking and peer pressure that lead to anger, anxiety, depression, or behavior issues
• Help children manage the emotional challenges of divorce


Product Details

  • Paperback: 260 pages
  • Publisher: Morgan James Publishing; 1 edition (October 1, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1600374840
  • ISBN-13: 978-1600374845
  • Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 15.2 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (83 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #552,547 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Susan Stiffelman is a unique blend of licensed therapist, credentialed teacher, beloved auntie and down to earth mom. Her book, Parenting Without Power Struggles is based on her work with thousands of parents and children, from celebrities to everyday moms and pops.

In her book, Susan offers mainstream, rubber meets the road advice that has been thoroughly tested on kids of all ages and demographics. At the same time, her approach to raising kids falls into step with the understanding of people like Eckhart Tolle and Marianne Williamson who recognize that parenting is in its own way a spiritual journey.

She's an adventurer (she took her 15 year old son on a two and a half month trip to Uganda, Tanzania, Australia and New Zealand), a visionary (homeschooled him in his early years when it was considered rather "iffy") and is an outside-the-box thinker (taught herself Hindi as a teenager by calling people named "Singh" out of the phone book!) Diagnosed with the ADHD label, she manages to accomplish more in a week than many do in a month, while maintaining a regular meditation practice and spending serious amounts of time playing.

Susan divides her time between Malibu, California with her son (when he's home from college), her dog Rosie, and a full and grateful heart.

Customer Reviews

When one of us is struggling, we talk about the book to each other, and that helps us regain perspective. michelle carlson  |  29 reviewers made a similar statement
Susan Stiffelman writes a book that is easy to read and follow. dva  |  28 reviewers made a similar statement
Susan is definitely a source worth listening to, and reading. Terry Tillman  |  13 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
24 of 25 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Finally, a parenting book that rises above the others! October 8, 2009
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
I've just read Susan Stiffelman's book, Parenting Without Power Struggles, and the title alone is enough to make a weary parent sigh. Finally, a book that resonates with my parenting instincts and offers concrete, do-able suggestions for accomplishing what sometimes seems to be the impossible: maintaining authority or as the author so lovingly calls it, being the 'captain of the ship,' while encouraging and deepening a loving bond between parent and child. How often have you walked away after yelling at your child out of sheer frustration and felt crummy, thinking 'this isn't right.' She addresses so many of our common areas of power struggle, like HOMEWORK. She also encourages us to 'celebrate our children' but not in a false manner that leaves them dependent and ill-equipped for the world. For busy parents, aren't we all, the book is laid out in short, easily readable chapters. A great place to start that will surely pique your interest are the Check Lists in the very back of the book, Checklist #1 and Checklist #2. Check it out!!!
Anna Anawalt, Los Angeles, Caliornia
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29 of 33 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
In the 6 years we have been parents, my husband has read 2 books, The Expectant Father and Parenting without Power Struggles. I have read more, which I'm sure is not uncommon. This book has made us better parents and has also made us better partners in parenting. Susan's methods are a mix of practical, developmentally appropriate approaches that are easy to implement in day to day situations. When one of us is struggling, we talk about the book to each other, and that helps us regain perspective. In some ways, Susan has become an absentee referee in our own parenting disagreements. He's more old-school, I'm more touchy-feely. This book met us in the middle. In some chapters she affirmed some things we were already doing and in others she gave us new perspective into what was really going on between us and the kids. I want to say that this book has some good old fashioned advice, but it's not old fashioned in it's presentation or reasoning. In our case, this book helped us as much with the power struggles between us as parents, as between us and the kids.
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing Book October 28, 2009
Format:Paperback
I have probably read 50 parenting books in my life and this is the best one ever. It is so well written, so right on topic. It is so easy to immediately transfer the info from this book into your day to day life with your kid. Loved it, loved it. Don't hesitate for a second to buy this one.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Still reading this book, but happy with what Ive read so far.
*** Im still in the toddler years with my child but I love having something in my brain for when the time comes, and things certainly apply to right now. Read more
Published 3 hours ago by Stephani Giovanni
5.0 out of 5 stars Simple yet effective steps for parenting
I really like the analogies, the question and answer sections, especially. I recently went through a divorce and my young children need me at my best due to an unpresent father. Read more
Published 2 days ago by Stacey
5.0 out of 5 stars One of THE best if not THE best.
I am a social worker and parent educator. I've read many parenting books, and this one is by far one of the best. It's different in a very good way. Read more
Published 11 days ago by Janice Bybee
5.0 out of 5 stars Helped my Family Incredibly
First, I want to tell you what an unbelievable impact you have made on me and my family. I have three little ones - 15 months, 3, and 5. Read more
Published 1 month ago by michele zipper
5.0 out of 5 stars great book
I bought this for my son and DIL. They say it's terrific! They are successfully using the techniques. I'm waiting to see how it works.
Published 1 month ago by Violinist
5.0 out of 5 stars loved this
best parenting book I've read. Highly recommend. (I have a strongwilled 4 year old and a 2 yr old) This book really changed my relationship with my children- what a gift.
Published 1 month ago by LINA
4.0 out of 5 stars Good book for parents of strong-willed children
I have been using some of the tools in this book and think the advice is sound. It has been working well with my 9 year old daughter and our head-butting has lessened whenever I... Read more
Published 1 month ago by Melissa Young
5.0 out of 5 stars So glad I found this book
I have 5 year old twins and a two year old, all boys... and this book is helping us get things back in control at home. Read more
Published 1 month ago by JH
5.0 out of 5 stars One of the most helpful, practical parenting books I've read
I collected many useful nuggets while reading this book. It's practical and logical. I've employed many of the techniques already, to much success. Highly recommend.
Published 2 months ago by A Reader in San Francisco
3.0 out of 5 stars Pass on this one.
Learned some, but kind of got bored with it.
I wouldn't recommend this book, but if you
want to read it then get it from the library.
Published 2 months ago by Julie Gilman
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