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Parenting Without Punishment: Making Problem Behavior Work for You Paperback – July 1, 1996

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Editorial Reviews

From Library Journal

Parenting shelves typically contain dozens of books offering endless techniques for behavior modification. This book may be the one that will help parents sort out the worthwhile from the drivel. Maag (Univ. of Nebraska) offers a strict and compassionate approach to behavior, arguing that punishment per se is almost never effective. The trouble is that we expect the good and punish the bad, which only leads to confrontation. Maag deals with how to use reinforcers, star charts, time outs, and contracts, concluding that self-monitoring by kids leads to self-control. Finally, he looks at ADD and depression as behavior problems that parents can deal with rather than as psychiatric labels attached to kids. Maag brings years of working with exasperated parents to his work. Refreshingly full of common sense and well worth reading.?Linda Beck, Indian Valley P.L., Telford, Pa.
Copyright 1996 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Review

This book will help parents sort out the drivel from the worthwhile. Refreshingly full of common sense and well-worth reading. --Library Journal

This excellent book, a very readable source of important information on behavioral principles and procedures, will have great appeal to parents who need help dealing with their children s problem behaviors. Especially useful for therapists and counselors to give to parents, it explains principles of behavioral analysis in a clear manner, well illustrated with real-life examples, and how they can be applied to a wide range of behavior problems, including ADD, depression and resistant behaviors. For a long time, the use of punishment has been decried by professionals without providing parents with positive alternatives. With the aim of enhancing the lives of both the children and the parents, Parenting Without Punishment is an excellent exception and should be read by every parent. --Journal of Child and Family Studies

No other parenting book has so successfully taken principles of behavior and transformed them into practical, easy-to-follow techniques. --Dr. Jo Webber, former Pres of The Council for Children with Behavioral Disorders

This excellent book, a very readable source of important information on behavioral principles and procedures, will have great appeal to parents who need help dealing with their children s problem behaviors. Especially useful for therapists and counselors to give to parents, it explains principles of behavioral analysis in a clear manner, well illustrated with real-life examples, and how they can be applied to a wide range of behavior problems, including ADD, depression and resistant behaviors. For a long time, the use of punishment has been decried by professionals without providing parents with positive alternatives. With the aim of enhancing the lives of both the children and the parents, Parenting Without Punishment is an excellent exception and should be read by every parent. --Journal of Child and Family Studies

No other parenting book has so successfully taken principles of behavior and transformed them into practical, easy-to-follow techniques. --Dr. Jo Webber, former Pres of The Council for Children with Behavioral Disorders
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 246 pages
  • Publisher: The Charles Press, Publishers (July 1, 1996)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0914783785
  • ISBN-13: 978-0914783787
  • Product Dimensions: 6 x 0.6 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,137,966 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful By Allison on August 6, 2004
Format: Paperback
I learned about this book in a forum on Positive Parenting, and put it on my Amazon wish list. I found it under the Christmas tree when my son was 2 and I've been following the advice in it ever since.

Large stretches of this book apply to older children, so I don't feel qualified to comment on those subjects yet (my son is 3 1/2). But the crux of the book is how to identify and isolate a behavior that you want to change. It is such a basic concept and yet so many parenting books fail to explain this. Rather than label your child as "sloppy," identify what you specifically have a problem with (e.g. leaving clothes on the floor). Then you can work with the child to change the behavior. A variety of methods are suggested. These are contrasted against punitive methods that often fail to do much more than demand immediate attention and often lead to children attempting to subvert the rules without understanding them.

Maag's discussion about "time outs," the most often suggested and most often misused form of discipline these days, is exceptional. When I read this part of the book, I immediately lost patience for all the experts and unsolicited advice-givers who seem to gush about this form of discipline. The purpose of the "time out," according to Maag, is to remove a child from a situation where he/she is getting negative attention. Used as a punishment, time outs do not end the misbehavior or address the underlying causes of the misbehavior. If a child is doing something just for the negative attention, removing the child to a new environment or simply removing your attention will end the cycle. Parents who angrily walk their kids to a chair in the corner whenever the child blows milk bubbles are giving the child the attention he craves.
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful By NICK G on September 25, 2001
Format: Paperback
:
I am surprised that the principles in the book are not more commonly used by educators. Clear and practical information and guidelines cover every page.
:
Many of the behavioral modifications recommended by Dr. Maag don't just work in our interaction with our kids, they also work quite well with adults.
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Probably the most interesting benefit I got from the book has been the opportunity to alter my own behavior, which, in turn, made a world of difference in helping our daughter to alter hers.
:
Highly recommended reading for parents, educators and for anyone looking to find different, more effective ways of dealing with others and with our own imprinted habits. An open mind is required for the readers of this book to gain any noticeable benefit.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on January 18, 2001
Format: Paperback
"Parenting bookshelves typically contain dozens of books offering endless techniques for behavior modification. This book may be the one that will help parents sort out the worthwhile from the drivel. John Maag, PhD (Univ. of Nebraska) offers a strict and compassionate approach to behavior modification, arguing that punishment per se is almost never effective. The trouble is that we expect the good and punish the bad and this only leads to confrontation. Maag shows us how to use reinforcers, star charts, time outs and contracts, concluding that self-monitoring by kids leads to self-control. Finally, he 1ooks at ADD and depression as behavior problems that parents can deal with rather than as psychiatric labels attached to kids. Maag brings years of working with exasperated parents to his work. Refreshingly full of common sense and well worth reading." -- Library Journal
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Mel Woods on February 1, 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book is a good intro to positive parenting and for that, I am grateful it exists.

However, as a teacher and parent, I think it misses the mark.

Perhaps it was because I was expecting the author to move away from behaviourism - and towards other effective methods of discipline - that I was a little disillusioned with the approach in the first place. I wanted a book that would make the non-punitive parenting ideas espoused in books such as Kohn's "Unconditional Parenting" - a reality. However, if you are drawn to this book because you are looking for more strategies that avoid manipulating children with punishment and rewards, this book isn't for you. A much more practical and realistic book if this is your goal is "Classroom Management: A thinking and caring approach" by Bennett and Smilanich.
This book is simply a 'positive' approach to behaviourist discipline, not an alternative approach.

Further, the examples in this book are long winded, and pretty ridiculous. His examples deal with minor indiscretions, such as a child picking their nose, and are quite idealistic for other other misbehaviours such as hitting or biting. This can be very irritating at times. I wanted to see a discussion of the causes behind common misbehaviour - attention seeking, power seeking, revenge etc - which in my experience, is the most effective way to deal non-punitively with poor behaviour. But the author finds it hard to break away from the very behaviourist ideologies he is advising against. It has the tone of 'talk to your children first, and if it still doesn't work, use rewards'.

The author starts the book with a long winded prologue on how this book is more practical where other books are not. But it was too theoretical in tone for me.
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