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Parents in Pain : Overcoming the Hurt and Frustration of Problem Children
 
 
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Parents in Pain : Overcoming the Hurt and Frustration of Problem Children [Paperback]

John White (Author)
4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (8 customer reviews)

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Book Description

June 22, 1979
A police car rolls up in front of your house--with your son in the back seat. A voice on the phone says your daughter is all right but won't tell you where she is--and then hangs up. A wallet disappears from your dresser and you're sure who took it--at least, somewhat sure. Many parents face problems beyond their ability to cope. John White ofers comfort to parents of children with severe problems--alcoholism, homosexuality, even suicide. Though he gives practical suggestions, this is not a how-to manual for making rebellious children behave. Rather the author helps all parents deal with their own guilt, frustration, anger and sense of inadequacy. White first asks, Why has the child rearing become such a complicated task? He looks to common sense, science and the Bible for an answer. Next he focuses on the parent-child relationship itself as trust erodes, arguments arise and the need for professional or legal counsel develops. Finally, he cautions us to avoid parenting techniques which emphasize pragmatism at the expense of what is moral and just. A book of comfort and counsel to parents in pain.

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 245 pages
  • Publisher: Inter Varsity Press (June 22, 1979)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0877845824
  • ISBN-13: 978-0877845829
  • Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.4 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (8 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #455,310 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

John White was born in Liverpool, England, on March 5, 1924, and grew up in Manchester. After serving as a reconnaissance photographer in the Fleet Air Arms during World War II, he completed medical training at Manchester University. He later participated in a variety of short-term missions efforts (including Bible smuggling!) and captitalized on many opportunities to encourage Christians behind the Iron Curtain during the beginning of the Cold War.

On June 25, 1955, White married Laureate May O'Hara. From 1955 to 1964 he served as a medical missionary with New Tribes Mission. Later he was appointed associate general secretary of the International Fellowship of Evangelical Students of Latin America.

White emigrated to Canada with his family in 1965 and later completed his residency in psychiatry in Winnipeg, Manitoba. He next filled the post of associate professor of psychiatry at the University of Manitoba and also served locally as pastor of Church of the Way.

He wrote 25 books as well as numerous articles and study guides. A much sought-after speaker, he lectured around the world at churches, conferences and leadership events. During his later life, White moved to Vancouver, British Columbia, helping to plant a Vineyard church there (Surrey Vineyard) and becoming involved in the larger Vineyard Christian Fellowship.

John White died in 2002, but his written ministry lives on, with over 1.5 million of his books in print.

 

Customer Reviews

8 Reviews
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4 star:
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Average Customer Review
4.9 out of 5 stars (8 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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43 of 44 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Someone Who Understands "Parents in Pain", November 12, 2002
This review is from: Parents in Pain : Overcoming the Hurt and Frustration of Problem Children (Paperback)
As a parent who had experienced many of the pains addressed by Dr. White in this book, I felt grateful -- grateful that he had so simply and so eloquently described many of the emotions that my husband and I encountered several years ago. As a current graduate student in Counseling, I found this resource one which I would happily share with Christian parents who find themselves dealing with these issues. The book presents hope and practical advice that parents so desparately need. It serves to remind them of a principle that at the times is so easy to forget -- you can't live your child's life for them, and you aren't really helping by always rescuing them from the consequences of their actions. Finally, I appreciated Dr. White's gentle and non-critical use of scriptural references and applications. He accomplished his goal, at least with this reader, of reminding me that ours is a God who is able and very willing to help us when we are in pain and that the help He gives may not be that for which we prayed, but it will always be that which is indeed the best.
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36 of 37 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Resource for Parents who need Tough love encouragment, February 1, 2001
By 
rodboomboom (Dearborn, Michigan United States) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)    (HALL OF FAME REVIEWER)   
This review is from: Parents in Pain : Overcoming the Hurt and Frustration of Problem Children (Paperback)
This is a growing group of people, who as parents find some of their children in such positions as they need to take those "Hosea/Gomer" steps in Hosea 2 of abandoning them until they hit bottom and realize "Gee, it was better with my first husband."

This is solid book with good advice to help such parents in such difficult scenarios have the reassurance they're not the only ones; have the encouragment to tough love it out, and also, neve give up on their kids or themselves as loving parents.

Have used this book professionally in counseling, and unfortunately, in my personal parenting as well. Excellent, blessed resource.

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13 of 13 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book, February 25, 2008
This review is from: Parents in Pain : Overcoming the Hurt and Frustration of Problem Children (Paperback)
This is a practical and compassionate book for parents struggling with out of control teenagers. It is written from a Christian viewpoint by a psychiatrist who had problems withe one of his own children. It covers the issues of low self esteem, threats of violence, nights of worry, illegal activity, etc., in a pragmatic way. The guidance is helpful - it won't take away the pain but it gives some idea of how to manage the situation.Parents in Pain: Overcoming the Hurt and Frustration of Problem Children
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