Partnering: A New Kind of Relationship [Paperback]

Hal Stone (Author), Sidra Stone (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 20, 2000

Famed therapists Hal and Sidra Stone show readers how to turn their relationships into true "joint ventures" - ones in which partners balance their need for relationship with their need for individuality, relinquish judgment and criticism, improve their decision-making and communication abilities, celebrate their sensuality and sexuality, and include children in their lives without sacrificing their own relationship. The Stones' greatest contribution has been revealing the many selves that make up our personalities. In this book, they show how those selves impact our relationships, and they offer both general concepts and specific tips that will help couples of all kinds succeed.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Drawing on pop psych paradigms from the '70s and more than two decades of experience counseling couples, both privately and in groups and seminars, the Stones (Embracing Each Other; Embracing Our Selves, etc.) advise readers on how to transform their intimate relationships into a "joint venture" based on "cooperation and equality, mutual respect and mutual empowerment." While they frequently refer to "the many selves" within each person (the "voice dialogue" therapy for which they are known involves these various "voices" in conversation with one another), the Stones' examples primarily feature an "inner parent" or "inner child," along the lines of the '70s classic I'm OK, You're OK. Their "no-fault" approach to conflict resolution in marriage is underscored by relatively benign case studies in which the partners tend to fall into traditional, stereotyped roles. Additionally, the Stones provide a list of "top ten challenges" to committed relationships that is incomplete, if not seriously unbalanced, in its neglect of such topics as conflict with in-laws, lack of money, problems on the job and addictions. While they offer good basic advice, and their view of the relationship as a "third entity" needing attention and nurture is sound, the Stones' overall approach is dated and simplistic, aimed mainly at couples who are already pretty well off.
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Library Journal

The main theme in the authors' newest book is that for relationships to work, participants have to take time to focus on each other, making all other distractions (including kids and work) secondary. Granted, this isn't anything that hasn't been said before. However, the Stones (Embracing Ourselves; Embracing Your Inner Critic) couch a lot of their explanations and exercises in Jungian and New Age-y terms. For example, they talk about the multiple personas each of us have and the importance of understanding which persona is "in charge" when dealing with one's partner and adjusting that persona if necessary. Likewise, they devote a chapter to what they term "energetic connection" and explain how to practice sharing energy back and forth with your partner. For public libraries where interest warrants.
-Pamela A. Matthews, Gettysburg Coll. Lib., PA
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 256 pages
• Publisher: New World Library, Nataraj (January 20, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1577311078
• ISBN-13: 978-1577311072
• Product Dimensions: 8.6 x 5.6 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (15 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #261,182 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

27 of 27 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Information You Always Wanted to Know About Relationships, September 4, 2000

By 

Elaine Rosenson, M.A., M.F.T. (Encino, CA USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Partnering: A New Kind of Relationship (Paperback)

As a Licensed Marriage and Familiy Therapist, I have found Hal and Sidra Stone's work to be the best model of understanding and working with couples that I have encountered. I am delighted to give this testimonial because their work has enriched my personal relationships as well as my work with couples. The Stones understand and convey to the reader the dynamics that create misunderstanding and pain in relationship, and give clear direction on how to create truly successful, soulful relationships. Couples love this non-pathological approach to understanding relationships. Hal and Sidra Stone go way beyond communication skills, helping couples to express their vulnerability in ways that lead to genuine empathy and intimacy. In addition, the descriptions of the energetic and non-verbal aspects of relationships help make sense of relationships in ways no other modality touches. This book is great for individuals, couples or therapists who want a fresh, brilliant new approach to making relationships work!

16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Review-Partering, June 14, 2000

By 

John (Knoxvlle,TN) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Partnering: A New Kind of Relationship (Paperback)

Partnering by Hal and Sidra Stone

Hal and Sidra Stone's new book Partnering suggests that vulnerability is the key to an intimate relationship. Being open and in touch with one's vulnerability is no easy task. This book, however, helps tremendously. It not only offers conceptual and spiritual guidance, but also has many practical suggestions, which are helpful on this journey. We have found this book to be helpful in guiding and solidifying our own relationship, and have also used it extensively with other couples. This new book is an important addition to the Stones' already substantial contribution to the journey of consciousness.

LeAnne Dougherty, LCSW, DSW Adjunct Pro. UT College of Social Work Private Practice

John H. Dougherty, Jr. M.D. Director, Cole Neuroscience Center Clinical Assistant Professor Medicine (Neurology) University of Tennessee Medical -Knoxville

14 of 14 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars PARTNERING - THIS ONE WORKS!, March 14, 2000

By 

JOHN BLIGH NUTTING (Australia) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Partnering: A New Kind of Relationship (Paperback)

Partnering requires relationship techniques that can be learned, it is not a theory or model it is a set of skills. Like any other skill, partnering also requires commitment if you are to learn it. And as with any skill it is best taught by those who have already learned that skill and have practiced it themselves. Hal and Sidra have certainly done that. `Partnering' A new kind of Relationship, does more than explain partnering. One of the many things I like about the book is the number of practical exercises that couples can use by themselves to develop their partnering skills, in particular the experience of linkage, openness, and intimacy plus of course the wonderful possibilities that open up to a couple when they use voice dialogue.  It is the only book I have read that can actually help a couple improve their relationship, working by themselves (and so many couples need that).