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Partnership Parenting: How Men and Women Parent Differently--Why It Helps Your Kids and Can Strengthen Your Marriage Paperback – September 1, 2009


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Partnership Parenting: How Men and Women Parent Differently--Why It Helps Your Kids and Can Strengthen Your Marriage + Fatherneed: Why Father Care is as Essential as Mother Care for Your Child + How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 240 pages
  • Publisher: Da Capo Lifelong Books (September 1, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0738213268
  • ISBN-13: 978-0738213262
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 5.9 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #546,806 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

Blogcritics.org, 10/9
“The authors are experienced in parenting both from personal and professional perspectives. This book is a good read…For the curious reader, the research and examples will be welcome background to support the recommendations the authors propose… Overall, the authors do an excellent job of holding mothers and fathers equally accountable for parenting, identifying gendered differences, and presenting tools for creating a parenting partnership, which works in excellent fashion to serves the needs of the child(ren)…Expectant parents, new parents, and parents in second families will find this book particularly useful as a tool to understand their similarities and differences in parenting and work together to build a parenting partnership.”

Tuscon Citizen, “Shelf Life” blog, 10/12
“Provides parents with the information they need to strengthen family life at all levels.”

InfoDad.com, 10/29/09
“The book’s suggestions for managing conflict, handling discipline effectively, and finding ways to strengthen the parental bond even when two people approach child-rearing differently, are certainly worth considering—and may make it easier to develop a family structure that works better for children and adults alike.”

Midwest Book Review
“From rules for negotiation to appreciating a partner's contributions, this is packed with case histories, quizzes, questions and solutions to common co-parenting issues. Any parent's library needs this.”

Work & Family Life, February 2010
“Describe[s] how men and women naturally parent differently and what can be gained from each approach…With wisdom and humor, Partnership Parenting will help both of you take advantage of your individual strengths to stay connected and confidently raise children together.”

Family Therapy, Winter 2010
“The authors reveal how men and women naturally parent differently—and what can be gained by both approaches…Partnership Parenting offers couples distinctly balanced ways to deal with everyday situations, from bedtime and feeding to discipline and schooling.”

New York Family, April 2010
“Explore[s] the different qualities that men and women bring to child-rearing, and how couples can combine their individual strengths in order to co-parent successfully.”

MensNewsDaily.com, 5/20/10
“An engaging and excellent book on gender differences in parenting…Shows that realization of the sexes’ complementary strengths can help foster a deep appreciation of the other parent, which can only serve to fortify the fabric of a partnership…The authors clearly care deeply about supporting parents’ and children’s well-being. Don’t miss this fabulous work!”

Review

Blogcritics.org, 10/9
“The authors are experienced in parenting both from personal and professional perspectives. This book is a good read…For the curious reader, the research and examples will be welcome background to support the recommendations the authors propose… Overall, the authors do an excellent job of holding mothers and fathers equally accountable for parenting, identifying gendered differences, and presenting tools for creating a parenting partnership, which works in excellent fashion to serves the needs of the child(ren)…Expectant parents, new parents, and parents in second families will find this book particularly useful as a tool to understand their similarities and differences in parenting and work together to build a parenting partnership.”

Tuscon Citizen, “Shelf Life” blog, 10/12
“Provides parents with the information they need to strengthen family life at all levels.”

InfoDad.com, 10/29/09
“The book’s suggestions for managing conflict, handling discipline effectively, and finding ways to strengthen the parental bond even when two people approach child-rearing differently, are certainly worth considering—and may make it easier to develop a family structure that works better for children and adults alike.”

Midwest Book Review
“From rules for negotiation to appreciating a partner's contributions, this is packed with case histories, quizzes, questions and solutions to common co-parenting issues. Any parent's library needs this.”
--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

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Customer Reviews

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It does a good job of illustrating the different parenting gifts that fathers and mothers are each given to be an effective team.
Andy
We hope to help you recognize that the problem is really the solution; that the difference is the pathway to happily-ever-after and to co-parenting as true partners.
J. Steven Svoboda
After reading this book I was able to appreciate how our parenting differences are not only okay, they're actually good for our children.
Lisa Faris-McNamara

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

7 of 8 people found the following review helpful By Midwest Book Review on November 16, 2009
Format: Paperback
PARTNERSHIP PARENTING: HOW MEN AND WOMEN PARENT DIFFERENTLY - WHY IT HELPS YOUR KIDS AND CAN STRENGTHEN YOUR MARRIAGE tells how to take advantage of different parenting styles, explains why kids need the influence of both Dad and Mom, and shows how couples can parent more effectively by noting and taking advantage of different styles. From rules for negotiation to appreciating a partner's contributions, this is packed with case histories, quizzes, questions and solutions to common co-parenting issues. Any parent's library needs this.
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Learning New Ways on March 19, 2010
Format: Paperback
I was struck in reading this book by how clear, direct, and sober it is about the importance of getting fathers engaged in co-parenting, and I could not agree more. From my own experience, and watching that of my niece and nephew, it seems very clear to me that children are very aware of whether their fathers seem to have wanted them or not, and wanted children end up leading dramatically more successful lives than those who feel unwanted. (I do not have children and am thinking about it if I can find a good father.) I am appalled when women friends of mine reveal that they had children without the father really wanting children (which seems to happen much more often than I would have expected) - of course, the man's choice to have a child when he did not want one is very much part of this problem, and it is not just the mother's choice and fault.

As the Pruetts point out, it is much easier to tackle these issues before the baby is born than after you are divorced. The soberness of their advice I found helpful, taking the gloss off the sometimes romanticized views that many people express about having children.

The book offers good, down-to-Earth advice that I imagine is helpful to men who are unaccustomed to childcare. And I liked how they reiterate that women need to learn these skills as well. Just having a womb and breasts is not enough.

Of the advice, I was glad to see the repeated references throughout the book to the importance of both the mother and father being sensitive to the child's needs and the reference in the divorce section to how one parent should handle it if the other is insensitive (empowering the child to assert him/herself with the insensitive parent, including ways he/she can communicate that).
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Lisa Faris-McNamara on January 1, 2013
Format: Paperback
This is the single most important parenting resource on the planet! Whether you're only considering parenthood or have recently become a parent or have been at it for years, this book should be required reading. Regardless of age, race, religion or socio-economic standing, parenting creates a mountain of potential and often times hidden sources of conflict between parents. Generally speaking, we're not taught about these issues/conflicts and we become parents without ever even knowing they exist so when they suddenly materialize we're unprepared to resolve them. When expecting, we discuss and decide hundreds of questions about whether to breast-feed to what the color of the nursery will be but we don't ever discuss or even think about the other hundreds of questions that we will face about how to parent. How many parents-to-be discuss issues like what time will the baby be put to bed for the night, how long will you allow the baby to cry before picking him/her up, will you use a pacifier and for how long? We don't discuss and resolve the questions of parenting that will become the sources of conflict between couples.

Through the intimate, sometimes funny and hauntingly familiar stories of other couples, the Pruetts present the gender-based parenting conflicts that inevitably plague most couples. They explain why the sexes parent differently and why these differences are GOOD for children. As a mother of two young children, I believed I was better than my husband at meeting the needs of my children. I knew what they needed or wanted even before they could speak and I controlled the how, when and why of parenting because I felt I did it better than my husband. WRONG! Nearly every mother I know reports similar feelings and we have the same complaints about how our husbands father.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By J. Steven Svoboda on November 28, 2012
Format: Paperback
Kyle Pruett, M.D., a Yale Child Study Center psychiatrist and author of such outstanding books as Fatherneed: Why Father Care is as Essential as Mother Care for Your Child and The Nurturing Father: Journey toward the Complete Man, and his wife Marsha Kline Pruett, Ph.D., a Smith College Social Work professor, have co-authored an engaging and excellent book on gender differences in parenting. The Pruetts devote the first half of their book to promoting the marital partnership, devoting separate chapters to the pithy topics of becoming parents together, "cuddling vs. the football hold" or why parenting differences are not deficiencies, building a partnership that works, managing conflict and fighting fair, valuing your spouse's contribution, and assumptions and actions. In the second half of the book, such critical aspects of parenting are addressed as discipline, "care and feeding," co-parenting and sleeping children, safety, and education. A brief, pithy epilogue provides pointers on divorce prevention.

The sub-title partially captures the book's thesis, in that the Pruetts analyze the typically quite distinct parenting styles of mothers and fathers, finding each extremely helpful to children's development but more importantly, discovering the wonderful synergy that can often evolve from two different individuals' approaches to supporting the education, growth and happiness of the children they love. However, in the authors' view, it is critical that parents maintain an external alliance with each other in their interactions with their children, reserving debates over parenting approaches for private discussions.
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