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Past Forgetting My Love Affair with Dwight D. Eisenhower

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Kay Summersby produced this book while dying of cancer. It was actually ghostwritten, but based on material she provided the shadowy author, who writes extremely well. In fact, it's very difficult to put this one down and I have read it several times over the years. Kay paints fascinating word portraits of various WWII personalities she met, including the profane and hilarious Patton, the bombastic Monty, the loquacious Churchill and the shy Omar Bradley.

Of course the most interesting character is Ike himself. There is no doubt Kay was utterly besotted with Eisenhower. She was wildly infatuated with him, as well as being physically attracted to him. How Ike felt about Kay is more nebulous and one can't dismiss the hundreds of love letters Ike penned to Mamie during the time he was entwined with Kay. The fact that Ike's staff denied he was sexually involved with Kay doesn't count for much; for a discreet couple, it's easy to fool outsiders.

Kay writes of two thwarted sexual encounters. Both occurred in public houses where people could presumably walk in on the amorous couple. Their first attempt at being intimate was in England, but Ike couldn't perform. He apologized profusely for this failure, but Kay assured him still she still loved him anyway. Their second attempt at consummation was after VE Day, in Germany. Kay claims that clothes were wildly discarded and they tried to get down to business... but again, Ike was unable to complete the act. Poor Kay!

Historians debate whether this is all wishful thinking. One might question why a woman would invent a situation where her would-be lover is impotent. If you're going to lie, why not go the whole nine yards and invent passionate couplings all over WWII Europe? Indeed, the dialogue Kay invents is more upsetting that her sexual depictions. It's hard to imagine Ike grabbing her and saying, "God-----, Kay, I love you!" Or fantasizing about having a baby with her. This sounds like pure fiction.

Despite all these problems, it's still an incredibly interesting book. You either accept Kay's romance with Ike or you believe she invented it all. I tend to think he was extremely attracted to her but was too uptight to commit adultery, especially with his chauffeur. Still, an excellent read.

First, I must admit to not caring much for books by people who "hung around" famous people. In fact I, for the most part, despise them. They, the writers, either have an axe to grind, want money or crave attention. I did not find this to be so with this particular work. Due to the circumstances in which it was written, time lines, the author's impending death, etc. I found it to be none of the things I usually dislike this type of work for. The book of course was written by a ghost writer, Barbara Widen, but it is obvious that Widen has captured perfectly the thoughts and perceptions of Kay. I found the book to be quite fascinating as to the late General and the details of his very private life during the height of the war in Europe. Now those that are expecting a torrid, sex filled autobiography tell all will be quite disappointed. The affair between these two people was not the almost gross stuff we read of today. It actually reads more like a high school romance than a story of an affair. The reader also must make up his or her own mind as to how truthful Kay is. For myself, I tend to believe most of what she has written. She had no real reason of make anything up at this point in her life. It would be very interesting to have available Eisenhower's side of the story, in his own words, but that is not going to happen. Most of what the author has recorded is perfectly logical and quite believable. One of the most interesting aspects of this story for me was, the unreal pressure that Eisenhower was under during this period of his life. This work brings this point out quite graphically. The book is an easy read, but I did find that after reading the first few pages, I could not put it down, ergo, I lost a full nights sleep. All in all, this is a very worth while read. It is handled with dignity and insight. Recommend this one highly.

During World War 2, a constant source of scuttlebutt was the relationship of General Dwight Eisenhower (1890-1969) and his British (Irish, actually) drive, Kay Summersby (1908-75). In 1948, Kay published her first book, Eisenhower Was My Boss, which gave a history of Kay's work with Eisenhower during the war, but glossed over any talk of an intimate relationship between the two. In 1973, after she was diagnosed with terminal liver cancer, Kay decided that it was time to tell the story of her affair with Ike. This book is Kay's story.

Published after her death, this book is the joint work of Kay Summersby Morgan and Barbara Wyden, a veteran ghost writer, and it is an excellent read. I really enjoyed the first half of the book, which covered Kay's early work with Eisenhower and what it was like. But, once we get to the blossoming of their relationship it takes on such a bittersweet edge, that it is almost heartbreaking. Overall, I found this to be a great read, one that really casts Eisenhower in a different light. I highly recommend this excellent book!

I grew up in a time when a honorable man kept his mouth shut and did his duty, not only to his country but to his family. And Dwight Eisenhower did just that. I found this to be a touching story. And I believe her story. She was truly a beautiful woman and I do not question he loved her. But being the honor bound man he was, he realized this could never be. "Loved I not country more...." He may have been a great military man, but on a personal level, he could not destroy the lives of those he had left at home. And he didn't.

One thing that continues to go through my mind is this: Didn't anyone question the fact he took his "driver" everywhere he went?? She HAD to have been more than that to him. Any enlisted man could have driven him where he needed to go. But he took her all over Europe with him, not mention Africa as well. Jobs were created for her. He helped her get US citizenship. Why? Because he loved her........And wanted her near him.

But when he got back home, he came back to reality. This was not going to work for him. And he did what was expected of him. Which makes me feel sorry for Kay Summersby. She may have dreamed of a future with him, but deep down she knew it would never happen. And it didn't.

I have no doubt that Kay Summersby's account of her "affair" with Dwight Eisenhower is true. As to why she waited so long to tell the whole story, well, she was a product of her time, and she no longer had anything to lose. To be accurate, it was not much of an "affair," because Ike was impotent (being married to a dowdy frump like Mamie would have made any man impotent). One can love in other ways than physical--Kay Summersby was quite a dish (a photo in the copy I read has a photograph of her with her legs crossed--great stems!), and I am not surprised that Ike was attracted to her. It is well known that most of the high-ranking American generals in WWII had mistresses, and apparently Ike was no exception. This is a very sad story, especially when Kay speaks of having to have her little Scotty dog put down (named "Telek" by Ike--an acronym of Telegraph Cottege and Kay, two things that Ike said made him happy). This is a must-read for anyone who enjoys, or sheds a tear over, sad wartime romances.

This book by a dying Kay Summersby is a poignant account of what can happen when a man and a woman are thrown into a wartime work relationship that is unrelentingly stressful and from which neither dare retreat.

In her book, written largely from memory, Kay has no regrets and makes no accusations. She treats her infatuation and love for her near-genius and overstressed boss, Dwight Eisenhower, with grace and sensitive restraint, focusing more on the emotional than the physical. Her book reveals how their extreme discression ensured that virtually no one on Eisenhower's staff understood their special relationship. Anyone who has read the book will understand the post-war denials of truth by those on the periphery of Eisenhower's inner circle. Both knew that when the war ended their love affair also had to end. It is a very personal story without a storybook ending.

Her book gives first-hand insight into the personalities and quirks of the major leaders of WW2. Kay treated the emotional aspects of her mutual relationship with Eisenhower with honesty and objectivity. It was a story that needed telling.

The characters Kay met during the war were not described in the depth I had hoped they would be. Her descriptions of the high points of her romance with Ike were pretty subdued. She was very starry-eyed and smitten with Ike, but I got the feeling that her visons of a perfect romance were about like those of a typical teenager.

I think that with all the time Kay and Ike were thrown together for several years, they each naturaly developed a close feeling toward the other. Ike was by nature a warm and caring person. Ike was as responsible as Kay for the closeness that developed. He always found ways to keep Kay with him. If I had personally been in Ike's position, I would have kept Kay as close as Ike kept her. I don't think there is any question about how much Ike needed Kay to get him through the war.

Ike was under enormous pressure to manage the war, and especially the planning for the D-day invasion. Kay became someone he could take refuge in -- a warm human shelter from the storm.

When the war ended, their romance ended as in "The French Lieutenant's Woman," or like a shipboard romance. Life moved on in a monumental way for Ike; Kay was left hanging. She could never manage forgetting.

Many have speculated that the romance could never have happened, that Kay must have made the whole thing up. What was the truth? I could not tell. I tend to think Kay believed the facts to be as presented in her book. I think she believed she was in love. Many of the high ranking officers in the war had live-in housemates. Oftentimes they made scant attempts to hide it. To now say Ike and Kay went through all they did together for as long as they did, and under such trying circumstances, without developing a romantic attraction toward each other, is nothing less than the denial of human nature.

I'm not troubled that Kay kept the story of the romance secret until she was nearly on her death-bed. As a close friend and confidante to Ike, this is what I would have expected and predicted.

Kay Summersby is a classy lady! No doubt Eisenhower was in love with her and "If the situation would have been different" as he always said, he sure would have married her after the war. But the circumstances being as they were, it was impossible for him to do so. All during the war, Kay was his nearest companion, his moral support. She had a unique place in Ike's heart, they shared so many historical and unique situations together, some crucials and some happy ones also. No wonder she was shattered when she realized there was no hope of them being together again after the war. They have been as close as a couple might be, and regardless of what the "entourage" and Einsenhower himself said of the "affair" afterwards, theirs was a beautiful love story and, frankly, I just couldn't put that book down.

Kay Summersby's book is a fascinating look at the inner workings of the Supreme Allied Headquarters during World War II. She writes clearly and consicely about the organization that helped win World War II in Europe, and provides key details about the personalities and relationships between such notable historical figures such as Eisenhower, Churchill, Montgomery, Patton, Bradley, and such.

However, the nature of her relationship with General Dwight D. Eisenhower is the central theme of the book and she repeatedly alludes to their stolen moments together. To a person, all others on Eisenhower's staff deny her accusations, including Eisenhower before his death, and can refute most of her stories of their love. For example, she describes in candid detail interludes and rendevous they supposedly shared, but at the time of many of these, Eisenhower was away from his headquarters or with others, including his wife and/or son.

In her first book, "Eisenhower Was My Boss," written in 1947, she makes no mention of this romantic relationship. Why, then, 30 years later, did she expose the "truth." Perhaps it was because she was on her death bed and looking back on a life unfulfilled. She had two failed marriages, no children, and no job history. A fantasized relationship with Eisenhower, one of the most powerful men in history, could be her legacy.

Aside from the falacious story of the relationship with Eisenhower, "Past Forgetting" is a good read if you are interested in the manner in which World War II in Europe was fought and won on both the political and military fronts.

First, I believed it hook, line and sinker. There was no bragging or self-aggrandizement here. It is her small story in a monumental time: two people quietly falling in love amidst the calamitous backdrop of WW2. In fact, in the couple of love scenes mentioned, DDE is reportedly impotent (although I think one has to read between the lines as to whether that was always the case or whether she's being discreet).

Kay, no feminist pioneer despite her job, was a woman of her time. She wasn't an impressive or unique character throughout the first half or so of the book, other than the fact that she drove the Supreme Commander. She was interesting solely for having a front-row seat to history at the side of Ike, as no other person knew him. Her descriptions of Ike's negative feelings towards Montgomery, Churchill's bad manners, the generals' mistresses and the wives back home in the States are amusing. But her oft-repeated emphasis on nightly bridge games and afternoon horse rides while so many were suffering and in danger was disappointing. The rotten cherry on this cake was that Churchill awarded her a medal for service which, she rightfully admits, was undeserved.

But towards the end, her humanity is full-blown and very moving. She is deserted by Ike, who states he'll send for her to come to the US, then sends an impersonal telex to all of his staff and she is let go from the group. Ike turns out to be a cad - he doesn't have the decency to tell her himself - geez, what happened to courage? (He came down a few pegs on my hero list.) Alone, except for the dog that she and Ike adopted and loved, she mildly stalks him but is rejected. (I've read elsewhere that she turned to alcohol in her disappointment, and that Ike referred to her as "Irish and tragic" in those later years.)

Her parting with her dying, beloved dog - the embodiment of the best years of her life - was so beautiful and poignant that it brought me to tears (I miss you Sporty). In the end, I was sad to see her go as the book ended. Like my parents, she was part of the greatest generation - warts and all - and they won't be back again as time marches on. I found the book had much to recommend it - imperfect but memorable: a story of true love and happiness: found and lost.