Customer Reviews

Pathways to Parenthood: The Ultimate Guide to Surrogacy

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Pathways to Parenthood is a "how-to" guide to surrogacy. It covers gestational surrogacy via IVF as well as traditional surrogacy via artificial insemination.

The mystery that surrounds surrogacy is demystified and everything is broken down into layman's terms. This book will take you from deciding if Surrogacy is the right path for you, to contact with your surrogate after the delivery and everything in between.

You will learn about the legal, medical, as well as the emotional aspects of choosing surrogacy as your pathway to parenthood. You will be given the pros and cons of using an agency as well as going about it on your own.

This book was written by a two-time gestational surrogate with experience in both agency and independent arrangements. In addition, the author has also held a position with a very reputable and established surrogacy and egg donation agency based out of southern California.

If you have ever considered surrogacy as a form of family building or you are just curious about the subject, this book is for you!

The author, herself a gestational surrogate (twice at time of writing), spent a lot of the book describing her feelings of what it was for her to be a surrogate, and why she chose to do so. She also added that most surrogates provide their bodies and lives, not for finances, but in order to give childless couples what not one else could, including the intended "biological" parents. However, as a result of this decision the author decided that she only wanted to surrogate for childless couples. To know you are carrying a child (yours or not) and knowing you have to "give up" that child is something that requires a strength and courage that only can come from God and this should never be discounted or made light of.

However, with my husband and I already having children and always desiring a larger family which we would have gladly created if possible... after the birth of our last child I had severe complications and due to the careless hand of a doctor my uterus was left completely destroyed which resulted not only in emotional pain as we suffered 10 miscarriages in 18 months, but also in physical pain not only due to my uterus, but to the 5 "corrective" surgeries I had which finally ended in a total hysterectomy (removal of my uterus and cervix but leaving my tubes and ovaries). I share this because after reading this book, I realized that if most surrogates thought like she did (surrogating only to childless couples) that we may never be chosen for her or their generosity... even though after my hysterectomy my doctor relayed that I "had the most beautiful tubes and ovaries she had ever seen" telling us "gestational surrogacy would be the most perfect option for us in creating the family we so longed to have."

The author did provide little descriptions about what occurs during the "getting pregnant" time. She also shared some of the differences and feelings that occurred by the surrogate, and barely the intended mother, during a traditional (artificial insemination) and a gestational (IVF) surrogacy.

Sections were also written regarding the pregnancy, the birth, and after the child was born... however all of this was from the perspective of the surrogate. Only, I skipped a lot of this part as I knew what to expect during labor, birth, and delivery. However, it was very cool to read that after one of the babies was born the intended mother dried it off as the father and mother cut the cord together.

There was a GOOD and HELPFUL section of the book that addressed surrogacy in general... items that must be addressed in a contract which need to be agreed upon by both the intended parent and the surrogate such as the number of embryos transferrd, how many transferred attempted, abortion (due to amnio or CVS, selective reduction, how much contact during and after the pregnancy/birth, whether or not to use an agency or find a surrogate independently, laws, etc.

Overall... obviously I was not impressed. I was looking for a book that discussed the in's and out's of surrogacy (especially gestational), not a journal of a surrogate mother.

Stacy Ziegler, to many you are a heroine for your courage in maintaining a position on the front lines of parenthood, and for your upfront talk about being a surrogate in the modern era of pregnancy. Not everyone is so courageous about it. The book you have written is a noble one and will help many, for you do not shy away from the tough questions and as you say, not everyone will be helped by surrogacy.

Some of the jargon is a little tough to get through, but I know how everyone who really wants a baby, and yet perhaps isn't able themselves to carry it off to term, will benefit from a) reading it through and b) digesting the material--the good news as well as the bad. The book is nicely produced and, at 120 pages, is not exactly WAR AND PEACE in length, but I don't think you will get many complaints about people feeling ripped off for paying $17.95 plus shipping for only 120 pages, for the material is interesting and the charts and other visuals well worth the attention of would be moms and dads.

I've read several books on Surrogacy when I was first starting out looking into being a surrogate and none of them were as helpful as this. As a Successful Gestational Surrogate I HIGHLY recommend this book to anyone who is pursuing surrogacy, whether it be someone who is looking to become a Surrogate (Gestational or Traditional) or Intended Parents.

I don't feel as if I was "ripped" off but the price, and there is a guide to the terminology in the back of the book. For 120 pages there sure is a lot of information packed into this "small" book. I was very impressed by this book and how well thought out everything was.

From one surrogate to another, Thank you for finally writing a book that was easy to understand.

I really enjoyed this book & recommended it to several others. It is a real personal description of the experiences she went through.