Customer Reviews

Peacetalk 101

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Author Suzette Haden Elgin's two-fold theme in this book is that talk PRECEDES violence, and peace is an ACTION  in addition to being a state of mind. Having a Ph.D. in Linguistics, Elgin knows language and peace talk well.

Using a story as a vehicle for her Rules of Peace Talk, Elgin tells us clearly how SPECIFICALLY to transform peace from a foggy state of mind or a passive yearning into an active way of being.

Her other books such as "The Gentle Art of Verbal Self Defense" and "How to Turn the Other Cheek and Still Survive in Today's World," (also available here from Amazon) lay the more scholarly foundation for her ideas.

"Peacetalk 101" is unique in that it gives the rules of Peacetalk clearly and quickly within a story line that shares the inner thoughts of the main character who finds himself in an emotional, downward spiral.

Elgin is skilled at dialogue and narrative. This is a good read. It is short, thought-provoking, and life-changing for anyone who begins to put the Peacetalk Rules into practice.

Sometimes it is easier to support peace movements in general than it is to bring peace to our own homes and neighborhoods. Yet without peace close to us, within us, we make errors in trying to force peace world-wide.

We have not been taught the skills that can make peace a part of our everyday environment. Elgin teaches us these skills in her book "Peacetalk 101," and she teaches very well. It is easier to believe peace on earth is possible after reading this book. This is a book of hope and personal transformation.

I have successfully used Peacetalk 101 with over 400 people who have been sent to my domestic violence classes. It is a modern day parable about a man who has alienated himself by engaging in verbal abuse. As a culture we have a tendency to think if we are not aware of something it cannot hurt us or that we are not responsible for what happens because of our ignorance of how things work. It is a simple read yet "deep" in terms of the principles taught.

As the story begins the main character has lost all sense of connection with himself, his partner and his child. It is unsettling that the main character is just an average guy, stressed but coping, attempting to make sense of his life. The story is about his preoccupations and assumptions leading to his alienation. Consequently we know very little about his wife, his child or the family's dog other than from his own ever narrowing point of view. Elgin skillfully helps the reader make sense of how he came to the horrorific conclusion that the solution to his alienation is to kill his wife and his child and then himself. Even the setting of the date seems "logical" in the context provided by Elgin.

As the story progresses he gains linquistic insights as a result of "chance" meetings with a person who looks like a homeless person but is a sage. The tension mounts as the day for the solution draws closer. Each "coincidental" contact with homeless person results in the main character (and the reader) learning another part of Elgin's system of verbal self-defense and his becoming more conscious of the effect his language choices was having on his perception of life. There is an interesting tension as one wonders if he is going to change enough to change his original plan. The ending? I will not give it away.

Summary of the Parable: We literally hurt ourselves and those around us with our verbal abuse. Conscious action creates greater consciousness. We can consciously engage in the skills outlined in Peacetalk 101. Elgin's parable instructs us step by step how to consciously choose and make healthy language choices that connect, inform, heal and uplift while not feeding into destructive verbal abuse cycles. She has skillfully introduced a complete set of verbal self-defense tools in the parable to be consciously used by the reader to create a verbal violence free environment.

Recommendation: It would be useful for the reader to obtain a copy of Elgin's The Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense to accompany the reading of Peacetalk 101. It would give the reader a deeper appreciation of what Elgin has accomplished in her parable. Elgin is the only author who has provided linguistic principles to stop verbal abuse.I have used her system since 1986 with people suffering from the effects of verbal abuse. It works.

This book was a wonderful read. Elgin manages to capture one of the woes of contemporary life, the fact that so many of us simply are not hearing our loved ones, our friends, and our fellow man. We are beginning to shunt away from others and in doing so make our own lives lessen and become miserable.

Enter PEACETALK 101. This book offers guidance in the form of a story, instruction that is entertaining and enthralling. I liked the element of the fantastical that keeps the reader involved and wondering all throughout the story.

A great work of inspirational speculative fiction.

I've bought two copies so far. My mother, my daughter and a co-worker have grabbed the one, the other I've had to hide so I'd have it for myself.

The "loan" copy just got grabbed by a pastor, so I've got to get another one.

The book is different. The people in it are real, remind me of my brother, not the pretend kind of people in most books. There is a real story being told, but a real message too.

I needed the book and I'm glad I found it.

"Peacetalk 101" is the first book I've read by Elgin, and I found it so compelling that I've gone ahead & ordered her whole "Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense" series, eager to learn even more. (unfortunately this series is now only available "used")

Peacetalk 101 is a wonderfully written parable/story about a man who, being at the end of his emotional rope, has decided that the only way out of the drudgery of this world is to end his own life - and since no one is around to take care of his wife & child, to end their lives as well - in 14 days - just long enough to get his affairs in order.

However something strange happens on this 1st of the 14 days - while on the bus he meets a homeless man who tells him a story, a story with a lesson. From this point on, although he resists the homeless man with all his might, he's always there on the bus, just waiting to tell him another story, followed by another rule to remember. These rules are all about how we create what we experience in life through our language.

Each of these lessons is wonderfully insightful on their own, but when strung together they are truly profound!

So do these lessons impact the angry man's life & his decision to commit a murder-suicide, or do they fall on deaf ears? I won't tell!

This is one of those few books that I wish EVERYONE would read & then teach the ideas to their children - the insights contained in this book are that important!!! And to boot, it's relatively short - just 100 pages with a decent-sized font. Overall, I honestly can't recommend it highly enough!

And if you enjoy this book, I would also highly recommend Og Mandino's books as well.

Peacetalk 101 is a slim book that provides parables that illustrate principles of communication that promote respectful, empathetic exchange and avoids abuse and aggression. My work has included work across deep political divides, and this book has provided the type of guidance that bridges gaps. I have given many copies of this book to colleagues and am ordering more! The book is simple and a quick read and very effective for people who want to communicate effectively. This little book really can change your life.

This was a good read, besides conveying a needed message and valuable information for these troubled times.