Perfectionism: What's Bad About Being Too Good (Paperback)

by Miriam Adderholdt Ph.D. (Author), Jan Goldberg (Author) "Perfectionism isn't a disease; you didn't catch it..." (more)
Key Phrases: healthy pursuit, gifted kids, New York, Free Spirit Publishing, Ice Age

Editorial Reviews

Product Description
With help for Superkids, workaholics, type A's, straight A's, procrastinators, overachievers, and caring adults, this book explains the differences between healthy ambition and unhealthy perfectionism and gives straight strategies for getting out of the perfectionist trap--from recognizing the symptoms to rewarding yourself for who you are, not what you do. It explains why some people become perfectionists, what perfectionism does to the mind and body, why girls are especially prone to it, and more.

About the Author

Miriam Adderholdt, Ph.D., is an adjunct professor at Lenoir-Rhyne College in Hickory, North Carolina. She has taught gifted students in grades K–9.

Jan Goldberg is a professional writer and credentialed teacher from Glenview, Illinois. She has authored 55 books and more than 800 articles on education and career development. The mother of three daughters with varying degrees of perfectionism, Jan also conducts writing workshops for aspiring teen authors.

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Product Details Reading level: Young Adult Paperback: 136 pages Publisher: Free Spirit Publishing; Rev Upd edition (January 15, 1992) Language: English ISBN-10: 1575420627 ISBN-13: 978-1575420622 Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 5.9 x 0.5 inches Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies) Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars See all reviews (6 customer reviews) Amazon.com Sales Rank: #272,112 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books) Popular in these categories: (What's this?) #66 in  Books > Children's Books > People & Places > Social Situations > Manners > Nonfiction #78 in  Books > Teens > Health, Mind & Body > Mental Health

Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Index | Back Cover | Surprise Me!

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Inside This Book (learn more)

First Sentence:
Perfectionism isn't a disease; you didn't catch it. Read the first page

Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
healthy pursuit, gifted kids

Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
New York, Free Spirit Publishing, Ice Age

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Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Index | Back Cover | Surprise Me!

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Citations (learn more)

This book cites 37 books:

• Dancing on My Grave by Gelsey Kirkland on page 40, and page 42
• A Bright Red Scream: Self-Mutilation and the Language of Pain by Marilee Strong on page 41, and page 42
• The New Birth Order Book: Why You Are the Way You Are by Kevin Leman on page 8, and page 15
• The Birth Order Book by Dr. Kevin Leman on page 8, and page 15
• Birth Order Book, The: Why You Are the Way You Are by Dr. Kevin Leman on page 8, and page 15

See all 37 books this book cites

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Books on Related Topics (learn more)

Special Kids Problem Solver by Kenneth Shore Psy.D.

Discusses:

• gifted kids
• perfectionist student
• Free Spirit Publishing

Special Kids Problem Solver by Kenneth Shore Psy.D. Discusses: gifted kids perfectionist student Free Spirit Publishing Loading...

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What Do Customers Ultimately Buy After Viewing This Item?

	55% buy the item featured on this page: Perfectionism: What's Bad About Being Too Good 4.2 out of 5 stars (6) $11.19
	12% buy Too Perfect: When Being in Control Gets Out of Control 4.6 out of 5 stars (19) $11.16
	12% buy What to Do When Good Enough Isn't Good Enough: The Real Deal on Perfectionism: A Guide for Kids 5.0 out of 5 stars (2) $9.99
	11% buy Nobody's Perfect: A Story for Children About Perfectionism 4.5 out of 5 stars (2) $9.95

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6 Reviews 5 star:  (2) 4 star:  (3) 3 star:  (1) 2 star:    (0) 1 star:    (0)           Average Customer Review 4.2 out of 5 stars (6 customer reviews)		Share your thoughts with other customers:
Most Helpful Customer Reviews 21 of 22 people found the following review helpful: 4.0 out of 5 stars Aimed at teenagers, but still has good ideas, January 7, 2005 By  Laura Brennan (Australia) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)    I didn't realise this book was aimed at teenagers when I borrowed it from the library... Nevertheless, it was still pretty informative for me. Some parts of it were a bit depressing -- references to suicide, eating disorders and such (which, in some cases, are problems perfectionism might lead to). However, there were some enlightening moments for me to... It had never dawned on me that perfectionism & procrastinaton go hand-in-hand. (That's definitely me!!) One light-bulb moment was when I read the chapter about perfectionism and relationships. It was time for me to accept there is no such thing as the "perfect partner", and that it's OK to be 90% happy most of the time, rather than expecting 100% all the time! I would recommend this book to any perfectionists out there, whether you are a teenager or not. The 10 Tips for Procrastinators were handy too. 7 of 7 people found the following review helpful: 5.0 out of 5 stars Required reading for today's highly pressured teens, May 30, 2007 By  Lorel Shea "gifted ed editor at bellaonline.com" (New England) - See all my reviews    Perfectionism: What's Bad About Being Too Good? Is a well written and accessible self-help book for teens. It speaks directly to the reader in a conversational tone. Chapters are organized into ten sections, with headings such as, "Why People Become Perfectionists", "What Perfectionism Does to Your Mind", and "When and How to Get Help Coping". The book contains a quick and easy self-assessment quiz to see how serious a problem perfectionism might be for the individual. A table illustrates the differences between the pursuit of excellence (a healthy desire to achieve) and perfectionism (unhealthy striving for perfection). Quotes from real teens are interspersed throughout the text, along with comments from well known historical and contemporary figures. Teens can learn to recognize their perfectionist tendencies, understand why these thoughts and actions are ultimately detrimental, and discover how to change their attitude and behavior. There's quite a lot of information packed into this 123 page guide! I would not recommend it for kids younger than about 12, as there are entries dealing with violence, the dangers of eating disorders, and self-mutilation. Examples of celebrities who died as a result of their eating disorders, and plain talk about the practice of "cutting" are probably best discussed with a parent after reading. I like the practical advice about balancing work and play. The advice here is meaningful and easy to follow. It's also interesting to note that some very famous thinkers were unhappy people who did not consider themselves to be successful. A quote form Leonardo DaVinci sums up his feelings, "I have offended God and mankind because my work didn't reach the quality it should have." Marie Curie, who discovered radium, once said, "I never see what has been done; I only see what remains to be done." Other topics addressed include overcommitment, setting reasonable standards, how parents may contribute to perfectionism, and how procrastination relates to perfectionism. The tips for procrastinators are real life solutions that can make a difference. The final section includes statistics on teen suicide and signs of a teen in crisis. It should be read by parents as well as teens. There are lists of relevant organizations and publications at the end of each chapter. Web sites may not be accurate, as the book was published in 1999. All of the writing and recommended readings are still completely valid and valuable. 2 of 2 people found the following review helpful: 3.0 out of 5 stars good book, but designed for teenagers, November 7, 2007 By  wifeandmomfromak (Eielson Air Force Base, Alaska, USA) - See all my reviews I purchased this book for myself...I am 37 years old. What I didn't realize until I bought the book is that it is a book written for teenagers. It is a good book, but not for a grown adult. I wished they would have specified that more in the description.		Ad feedback   Most Recent Customer Reviews 4.0 out of 5 stars Perfectionism This book is a good starting point for understanding the general forces behind a perfectionist's makeup. Read more Published on February 12, 2007 by E. SMOLINSKI 4.0 out of 5 stars Easy reading Sometimes it is nice to discover a self-help book that is easy to read and written in a light-hearted tone even when discussing a difficult or serious subject. Read more Published on October 3, 2005 by R. Hanloh 5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome book for teenage perfectionists! This was a great book for dealing with perfectionism. It has so many good ideas for helping yourself! I loved it! It truly covers all areas of the perfectionism problem. Published on December 20, 1999 Search Customer Reviews Only search this product's reviews

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Product Details

• Reading level: Young Adult
  
• Paperback: 136 pages
• Publisher: Free Spirit Publishing; Rev Upd edition (January 15, 1992)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1575420627
• ISBN-13: 978-1575420622
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 5.9 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #272,112 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

  Popular in these categories: (What's this?)

  #66 in	Books > Children's Books > People & Places > Social Situations > Manners > Nonfiction
  #78 in	Books > Teens > Health, Mind & Body > Mental Health

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

21 of 22 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Aimed at teenagers, but still has good ideas, January 7, 2005

By	Laura Brennan (Australia) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

I didn't realise this book was aimed at teenagers when I borrowed it from the library... Nevertheless, it was still pretty informative for me.

Some parts of it were a bit depressing -- references to suicide, eating disorders and such (which, in some cases, are problems perfectionism might lead to). However, there were some enlightening moments for me to... It had never dawned on me that perfectionism & procrastinaton go hand-in-hand. (That's definitely me!!)

One light-bulb moment was when I read the chapter about perfectionism and relationships. It was time for me to accept there is no such thing as the "perfect partner", and that it's OK to be 90% happy most of the time, rather than expecting 100% all the time!

I would recommend this book to any perfectionists out there, whether you are a teenager or not. The 10 Tips for Procrastinators were handy too.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Required reading for today's highly pressured teens, May 30, 2007

By	Lorel Shea "gifted ed editor at bellaonline.com" (New England) - See all my reviews

Perfectionism: What's Bad About Being Too Good? Is a well written and accessible self-help book for teens. It speaks directly to the reader in a conversational tone. Chapters are organized into ten sections, with headings such as, "Why People Become Perfectionists", "What Perfectionism Does to Your Mind", and "When and How to Get Help Coping".

The book contains a quick and easy self-assessment quiz to see how serious a problem perfectionism might be for the individual. A table illustrates the differences between the pursuit of excellence (a healthy desire to achieve) and perfectionism (unhealthy striving for perfection). Quotes from real teens are interspersed throughout the text, along with comments from well known historical and contemporary figures.

Teens can learn to recognize their perfectionist tendencies, understand why these thoughts and actions are ultimately detrimental, and discover how to change their attitude and behavior. There's quite a lot of information packed into this 123 page guide! I would not recommend it for kids younger than about 12, as there are entries dealing with violence, the dangers of eating disorders, and self-mutilation. Examples of celebrities who died as a result of their eating disorders, and plain talk about the practice of "cutting" are probably best discussed with a parent after reading.

I like the practical advice about balancing work and play. The advice here is meaningful and easy to follow. It's also interesting to note that some very famous thinkers were unhappy people who did not consider themselves to be successful. A quote form Leonardo DaVinci sums up his feelings, "I have offended God and mankind because my work didn't reach the quality it should have." Marie Curie, who discovered radium, once said, "I never see what has been done; I only see what remains to be done."

Other topics addressed include overcommitment, setting reasonable standards, how parents may contribute to perfectionism, and how procrastination relates to perfectionism. The tips for procrastinators are real life solutions that can make a difference.

The final section includes statistics on teen suicide and signs of a teen in crisis. It should be read by parents as well as teens. There are lists of relevant organizations and publications at the end of each chapter. Web sites may not be accurate, as the book was published in 1999. All of the writing and recommended readings are still completely valid and valuable.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars good book, but designed for teenagers, November 7, 2007

By	wifeandmomfromak (Eielson Air Force Base, Alaska, USA) - See all my reviews

I purchased this book for myself...I am 37 years old. What I didn't realize until I bought the book is that it is a book written for teenagers. It is a good book, but not for a grown adult. I wished they would have specified that more in the description.