Customer Reviews

Perfectionism: What's Bad About Being Too Good

5 star:		(4)
4 star:		(5)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

I didn't realise this book was aimed at teenagers when I borrowed it from the library... Nevertheless, it was still pretty informative for me.

Some parts of it were a bit depressing -- references to suicide, eating disorders and such (which, in some cases, are problems perfectionism might lead to). However, there were some enlightening moments for me to... It had never dawned on me that perfectionism & procrastinaton go hand-in-hand. (That's definitely me!!)

One light-bulb moment was when I read the chapter about perfectionism and relationships. It was time for me to accept there is no such thing as the "perfect partner", and that it's OK to be 90% happy most of the time, rather than expecting 100% all the time!

I would recommend this book to any perfectionists out there, whether you are a teenager or not. The 10 Tips for Procrastinators were handy too.

Perfectionism: What's Bad About Being Too Good? Is a well written and accessible self-help book for teens. It speaks directly to the reader in a conversational tone. Chapters are organized into ten sections, with headings such as, "Why People Become Perfectionists", "What Perfectionism Does to Your Mind", and "When and How to Get Help Coping".

The book contains a quick and easy self-assessment quiz to see how serious a problem perfectionism might be for the individual. A table illustrates the differences between the pursuit of excellence (a healthy desire to achieve) and perfectionism (unhealthy striving for perfection). Quotes from real teens are interspersed throughout the text, along with comments from well known historical and contemporary figures.

Teens can learn to recognize their perfectionist tendencies, understand why these thoughts and actions are ultimately detrimental, and discover how to change their attitude and behavior. There's quite a lot of information packed into this 123 page guide! I would not recommend it for kids younger than about 12, as there are entries dealing with violence, the dangers of eating disorders, and self-mutilation. Examples of celebrities who died as a result of their eating disorders, and plain talk about the practice of "cutting" are probably best discussed with a parent after reading.

I like the practical advice about balancing work and play. The advice here is meaningful and easy to follow. It's also interesting to note that some very famous thinkers were unhappy people who did not consider themselves to be successful. A quote form Leonardo DaVinci sums up his feelings, "I have offended God and mankind because my work didn't reach the quality it should have." Marie Curie, who discovered radium, once said, "I never see what has been done; I only see what remains to be done."

Other topics addressed include overcommitment, setting reasonable standards, how parents may contribute to perfectionism, and how procrastination relates to perfectionism. The tips for procrastinators are real life solutions that can make a difference.

The final section includes statistics on teen suicide and signs of a teen in crisis. It should be read by parents as well as teens. There are lists of relevant organizations and publications at the end of each chapter. Web sites may not be accurate, as the book was published in 1999. All of the writing and recommended readings are still completely valid and valuable.

I purchased this book for myself...I am 37 years old. What I didn't realize until I bought the book is that it is a book written for teenagers. It is a good book, but not for a grown adult. I wished they would have specified that more in the description.

This book is a good starting point for understanding the general forces behind a perfectionist's makeup. You can use this book to identify characteristics, then narrow your research more specifically to suit your interests or queries; yet it is also detailed enough to be the only book one reads if you only want general knowledge of this personality type.

Being mormon is enough to put Ew-tah close to the top in prescription drug use (Prozac Nation, indeed); leaders' insistance that the rank-and-file obsess over such trivia as earrings-tattoos and (men) wearing white shirts...goes hand-in-hand with the 'Selling' of fear & guilt in Morland.
ANY book that teaches people that perfection is for the god(s) should be Healthy.
As long as the only thing recognized-acknowledged as worthwhile is PERFECTION, that amounts to a Formula for FAILURE.

I actually liked this book, though I am 32 and it was apparently written for teens as other reviewers already said.

This is a short book (I was able to finish it in one sitting) and even though I doubt it will really make you stop being a perfectionist, I still think it will provide you with good general information about causes and symptoms of being a perfectionist. If you read it, you'll become aware of the many ways perfectionism might express itself in your own life, and, as they saw, awareness is the first step towards cure and liberation.

I also liked the numerous examples of real life situations provided in the book, even though they were of teens--it was still relevant for an adult as well. Some parts of the book will relate mostly if not completely to teens, though. The other good thing about the book is the numerous references for further reading and exploration that the author provides.

One of the cons of the book is that it lacks really serious tools to deal with perfectionism. I've been a perfectionist all my life and I doubt that using only the tools provided in the book I'd be able to break free. Our mind is just a very tricky machine and it won't let go just that easy. After all, at the root of perfectionism lies our identification with things, achievements, and so on, and to stop this harmful habit will mean to really change the way we see ourselves and the way around us. And that is not easy. There's also the danger of approaching the very problem of being a perfectionist with perfectionism and demanding perfect results in stopping being a perfectionist. Still, the ways to deal with it, the author provides, might be helpful as general guidelines and directions of behavior.

I've given this book 4 stars because I think that overall it provides what it promises and it's an enjoyable reading overall. A good way to get to know the subject and its place in our everyday lives. A good way to see real life examples and situations and learn about what can be done about them.

I'd recommend this book to anyone who wants to learn to recognize and deal with perfectionism in their life.

I am perfectionist, never had strait A like they talk all over the book. It dose not mean the book is bad, it make me reflect on many things: procrastination, I never tough I was doing that. Just reading that part make me go forward.

Ms. Adderholdt has keen insight into people and behaviour. This is a very concise book that is helpful in so many respects.

Sometimes it is nice to discover a self-help book that is easy to read and written in a light-hearted tone even when discussing a difficult or serious subject. This is one such book.

This was a great book for dealing with perfectionism. It has so many good ideas for helping yourself! I loved it! It truly covers all areas of the perfectionism problem.