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Editorial Reviews
Prepare for double the action, double the terror and double the D’s. The prehistoric school of bloodthirsty piranhas are back and this time, no one is safe from the flesh-eating fish as they sink their razor sharp teeth into the visitors of summer’s best attraction, The Big Wet Water Park. Starring Danielle Panabaker, Matt Bush, David Koechner, Chris Zylka, Katrina Bowden, Gary Busey, Christopher Lloyd and David Hasselhoff.
Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
38 of 44 people found the following review helpful
Format:Blu-ray
The recent remake of Piranha was nearly pitch-perfect. Gleefully hapless characters (portrayed with excellent B-movie abandon by the likes of Elisabeth Shue, Christopher Lloyd, and even Richard Dreyfus) trotted through the cliche-riddled story and provided both laughs and inventive, over-the-top gore. It wasn't out to win any awards, but what it WAS out to do -- amuse and disturb -- it did quite well. So, of course, they had to make a sequel.
Unfortunately, they neglected to include half of the original formula. Truly excessive T&A? Check. Obvious character archetypes doing/saying obvious things? Check. Humor, either hokey, offensive, or smart? Check. Scares and grind-em-up deaths?
Not so much.
The problem here lies right in the set-up: an unapologetically awful man (played by David Koechner) opens a water park (with an adults only section) and contrives to fill it for free from a nearby lake. Three guesses how that plays out.
Yes. The piranhas infest the water park, and therein lies the problem. I don't know if you've ever been to a water park, but every one I've ever visited appeared to have been planned and designed by a blind man with permanent vertigo. This is usually in keeping with the looping, curving, twisting paths of the various water slides and lazy rivers, and it means it's not that hard to get turned around if the park is big. The point being: filming in one must be hell.
There is never any real sense of place to the film, and the park is never given a wide enough shot to really show the scale of the disaster. At the same time, the very fact that people are inches away from simply hopping out of the water reduces both the scale, spectacle, and believability of any of the chaos. There's a ten or fifteen minute scene of people thrashing about in water that is two feet wide and three feet deep. Gone is even any attempt at terror or (failing that) anything close to the stomach-churning destruction found in the first film.
The movie tries to make up for this in other ways. There are a couple of piranha attacks outside of the park, one of which is so over-the-top ludicrous that it is almost annoying. I won't give away any details, but I will say that it's one step away from characters shooting live piranhas out of shotguns like some kind of Itchy and Scratchy cartoon. But that's probably the point. While the first film was an aggressive and ham-fisted satire of Swarm Horror, this movie seeks only to be a cartoon of it. It's not really the same thing, and so this film -- if you'll pardon the pun -- very much lacks the bite that made the first one such a success.
As a live action cartoon, though, it's not bad. David Hasselhoff does a great job of making fun of himself AND the film. ("Stupid ginger boy," he complains when he hears the screams of a kid who's getting eaten. "Why did you get back in the water?") He's one of the better parts of the film, although he is also overused. Ving Rhames, Paul Scheer, and Christopher Lloyd, on the other hand, are woefully underused. They brighten up their brief blips in the film, but all of them feel like they were added to the script at the last minute. There are some puns and gags that work, and some that don't.
It feels half done, is the point, and this is even evident in the run time. IMDB will tell you it's 83 minutes long, but that's counting the very slow credits crawl at the end. Perhaps knowing the deficit in their film, the makers put outtakes, deleted scenes, and a gag reel over half of these end credits. It's kind of like a nice, advanced special features addition, and I enjoyed it for what it was, but I also saw it for what it was meant to be: a quick, easy distraction from the fact that the film was more entertaining behind the scenes than in front of it.
Fun for what it is, but not as fun as it wants to be or should live up to. You might enjoy yourself if you have low expectations, or you might just have more fun watching Skinemax and putting some fish in a blender.
Unfortunately, they neglected to include half of the original formula. Truly excessive T&A? Check. Obvious character archetypes doing/saying obvious things? Check. Humor, either hokey, offensive, or smart? Check. Scares and grind-em-up deaths?
Not so much.
The problem here lies right in the set-up: an unapologetically awful man (played by David Koechner) opens a water park (with an adults only section) and contrives to fill it for free from a nearby lake. Three guesses how that plays out.
Yes. The piranhas infest the water park, and therein lies the problem. I don't know if you've ever been to a water park, but every one I've ever visited appeared to have been planned and designed by a blind man with permanent vertigo. This is usually in keeping with the looping, curving, twisting paths of the various water slides and lazy rivers, and it means it's not that hard to get turned around if the park is big. The point being: filming in one must be hell.
There is never any real sense of place to the film, and the park is never given a wide enough shot to really show the scale of the disaster. At the same time, the very fact that people are inches away from simply hopping out of the water reduces both the scale, spectacle, and believability of any of the chaos. There's a ten or fifteen minute scene of people thrashing about in water that is two feet wide and three feet deep. Gone is even any attempt at terror or (failing that) anything close to the stomach-churning destruction found in the first film.
The movie tries to make up for this in other ways. There are a couple of piranha attacks outside of the park, one of which is so over-the-top ludicrous that it is almost annoying. I won't give away any details, but I will say that it's one step away from characters shooting live piranhas out of shotguns like some kind of Itchy and Scratchy cartoon. But that's probably the point. While the first film was an aggressive and ham-fisted satire of Swarm Horror, this movie seeks only to be a cartoon of it. It's not really the same thing, and so this film -- if you'll pardon the pun -- very much lacks the bite that made the first one such a success.
As a live action cartoon, though, it's not bad. David Hasselhoff does a great job of making fun of himself AND the film. ("Stupid ginger boy," he complains when he hears the screams of a kid who's getting eaten. "Why did you get back in the water?") He's one of the better parts of the film, although he is also overused. Ving Rhames, Paul Scheer, and Christopher Lloyd, on the other hand, are woefully underused. They brighten up their brief blips in the film, but all of them feel like they were added to the script at the last minute. There are some puns and gags that work, and some that don't.
It feels half done, is the point, and this is even evident in the run time. IMDB will tell you it's 83 minutes long, but that's counting the very slow credits crawl at the end. Perhaps knowing the deficit in their film, the makers put outtakes, deleted scenes, and a gag reel over half of these end credits. It's kind of like a nice, advanced special features addition, and I enjoyed it for what it was, but I also saw it for what it was meant to be: a quick, easy distraction from the fact that the film was more entertaining behind the scenes than in front of it.
Fun for what it is, but not as fun as it wants to be or should live up to. You might enjoy yourself if you have low expectations, or you might just have more fun watching Skinemax and putting some fish in a blender.
17 of 21 people found the following review helpful
By Matt Sowders
Format:Blu-ray
This movie cracked me up! If you've seen and enjoyed the first one, then you know exactly what you're getting with 3DD! It's a throw back to all the old exploitation films. Is it going to win an Oscar? Nope! Is there plenty of attractive, naked women, laughs and lots of blood? You bet! And isn't that why you're watching this movie in the first place?
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
By Mule04
Format:Blu-ray|Amazon Verified Purchase
You will have to know before you watch this movie that this movie is far from being serious. I actually watched this movie because the first one made me laugh more then cringe. I was amused but overall not as good as the first. If you are into just naked women with big you know whats you will get entertained. Thats why I was, but to expect an actual cool storyline then you will be let down.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars
She love it
My best friend love love this movies and she told me to buy it because I would like it and she was right I loved it
Published 5 days ago by Chanise
3.0 out of 5 stars
Well, that was a mess
First of all this movie includes everything the first had, crazy humor, over the top acting/gore, hot chicks getting topless, characters that don't have much story that we get to... Read more
Published 8 days ago by R. Jensen
4.0 out of 5 stars
Funny campy movie
This was a funny campy movie with some gore. I liked the light-hearted movie that did not take itself seriously.
Published 25 days ago by LEROY W.
3.0 out of 5 stars
saw it had Danielle Panabaker thought what the heck
saw the first one made sense undergound lake that had alot of pirahna waiting to get out they ate each other to survive great flick saw this one and i have movies with Panaber in... Read more
Published 1 month ago by michael p reitzel
1.0 out of 5 stars
stupid movie with T&A
A lame rip off. Stupid humor. I am sure the high school boys loved the naked girls. I need a bit more than that even in a spoof movie.
Published 1 month ago by Sickone
1.0 out of 5 stars
Horrible movie with bad acting
Horrible acting, could not get through 15 minutes of this movie, then watched something else. Would not recomend this to anyone.
Published 1 month ago by Joe Gruss
1.0 out of 5 stars
YUCK
TERRIBLE FILM ACTING. ALL ABOUT BIG BREAST AND THE GORE WAS WAY TOO MUCH. A KID DYING AND THE SKIN AND BONES EEK!
Published 1 month ago by NIKDOG
1.0 out of 5 stars
The movie is a joke.
And it's a bad joke. The story is not a good one but if the director know how to tell story, he can make it a bit more convincing.
Published 1 month ago by quinn vo
4.0 out of 5 stars
latest in the piranha series
cheap thrills, transferring piranha from girl to boy was kinda a hoot. the Hof was not up for an Oscar. Now the prehistoric piranha can walk on land, cant wait for the next movie
Published 1 month ago by Samuel L. Auyong
1.0 out of 5 stars
Movie for 13 Year Old Boys
I like breasts as much as the next guy, but geez, this is a movie that could have appealed to a larger audience if they were less obvious. Read more
Published 2 months ago by eyelike2watch
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