Customer Reviews

Pirates (R-Rated Version)

5 star:		(7)
4 star:		(4)
3 star:		(5)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(7)

 

 

If you're looking to get turned on, go get the original porn version of this film and watch it the way it was meant to be watched. The R-rated version of Pirates may be a little sexy and have lots of T&A, but, in order to keep their R rating, they have to cut out before any of the good stuff happens.

That being said, I highly recommend this movie to anyone with a slightly twisted sense of humor. The dialogue in the movie is idiotic...brilliantly idiotic. With lines such as:
"I smell something burning."
"Probably your crotch from all the action you've been getting."
You'll definitely be laughing WITH the writers, not AT them.

And yes, the acting is terrible, but that also adds to the fun of this version. There's a reason they are called Porn stars instead of actors: they can't act. But the hilarious dialogue paired with the monotone or somewhat awkward delivery is priceless. And some of the stars do a really great job of camping it up and making fun of their own bad acting. It makes me think of something a group of drunk friends would act out to entertain a crowd. I was laughing all the way through. I think this one will be great to show at my next party. Good times...

I rented this movie without a cover and I thought I was in for a Pirates of the Carribbean type adventure. I put the tape in my VCR when my entire family was wide awake roamimg the house. When I saw the Produced by Adam&Eve and Digital Playground credits, I immediately ejected the tape because I knew what I was in for. So I watched it at night and it was hilarious. The lead actor role cracked me up, I also really dig Jesse Jane and Evanna. Wow, I'm most definitely going for the 3-disc version which unfortunately Amazon doesn't have.

I was glad to see they've released an R-Rated version of Pirates. While the real thing is best, if you're too reserved to watch it, than you simply must check it out in its edited form. I mean, think about it. They edited out the hard-core scenes and there is still a 1 hour and 25 minute long movie left. This is not your typical porno. On top of hot girls like Jesse Jane and Carmen Luvana and Janine, you get a wonderfully cheesy plot, some decent costume and set design, absolutely absurd CGI effects, and some hysterical B-rated dialog (delivered impeccably by Evan Stone, who we've affectionately dubbed "The Bruce Campbell of Porn"). All it needs is some gushing fake blood in the swashbuckling scenes and it would be Troma-worthy.

Pirates is brilliant. I strongly encourage everyone who is OVER 18 to purchase the original, unedited, triple disc set, if only for comparison. The adaptation to include general mature audience is legendary and a major milestone to everyone involved. Kudos to director Joone, super hot Jesse Jane, Janine and my favorite Carmen Luvana! An amazing cast, an amazing production - Evan Stone is fantastic. It's funny and sexy and worth EVERY cent. Buy the collectors / first editions EVERY cut ever released - this movie has made history.

The R-rated version of an adult film is a terrific waste of time. Most adult films have so little plot to hang the story onto, they barely deserve the description of being "movies". In cutting this film to an R-rating, the producers have gutted the film (nay, movie) into a set of disjointed scenes that jump-cut past what was obviously the most important activity in the movie in the first place: the sex. The effect is jarring, like being Billy Pilgrim (from Kurt Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse Five"), constantly jumping ahead in time and always "just when things were getting interesting".

If you want to see this movie, get the unrated or adult version. Leave the R-rated on the shelf, for the seventeen year-olds.

As someone who watches an a porn every once and awhile, when I heard this had made it to Holywood Vid as a R-Rated movie, Idecided to rent it. Nice but not complete. It really is a massive accomplishment for the Porn industry, and needs to be done more often. If I am going to watch a Porn, I wat one with a plot and this for a Porn had it in spades. Relly onely one or two sex scenes really felt stretched to be included. The major problem is that this isn't complete without the full scenes. Get the XXX Version with the Windows media Player HD version on the third disc.

Lots of pretty girls! perfect film for boys. I like it.
Delivery is much faster than I expect. I bought Pirates I and II, one was new and the other was used. Both were good quality. The used one looked like new, and much cheaper.

Daniel Lee Taylor "dan57" you are totally clueless. All this is, is an edited version of the porn. This is a PORN film. Not some cheap lets make fun of POTC, but a PORN. Just thought I would let you all know who are confused as well.

Amazon does not sell X rated movies - there are NC-17 movies and R rated movies. Read the description, read reviews - decide for yourself.
This is the cut version of real porn. If you are squeamish, perhaps this is a good route. We loved the original, it's hot and it's hilarious! Total spoof, silliness and gadzooks the heat will save your furnace a day during the winter. Enjoy it - maybe if you are concerned, try this one and see if you prefer to take it further.

This movie is excellent! Even if you are not into this kind of movie (Rated X) it's still a great movie to watch. It isn't just an X-rated film, it's a movie as well. And it is pretty funny too if you actually listen to the dialogue.