Plain and Simple: A Woman's Journey to the Amish [Hardcover]

Sue Bender (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: October 18, 1989

An urban Californian vividly describes her sojourn with the Amish that changed her outlook and values and healed her fragmented life--complemented with her evocative drawings of Amish life, artifacts, and designs.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Modern-day career woman and homemaker Bender tells of the compulsion--for Amish dolls and quilts that seemed to evoke a simpler life--that took her from New York State to Iowa and Ohio, where she lived with sympathetic Amish families and began the journey of self-discovery here described. The unvarying rhythm of "plain" lives, the importance placed on every day's manual labor and the absence of contemporary distractions such as telephones and microwaves proved revelatory; the one-time Californian was awed by "an aesthetic leanness, a paring down that I have come to appreciate." In her graceful tribute to a community of people who value the ordinary as an end in itself, Bender allows us to sojourn vicariously miles away from the frenzy of contemporary urban life.
Copyright 1989 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Review

In 1967, Sue Bender found herself mesmerized by the dark muted colors of Amish quilts and the haunting beauty of their faceless stuffed dolls. The quiet simplicity of these crafts eventually led her on a journey of self-discovery to two Amish communities in 1982. Not surprisingly, Sue Bender, an over-achiever with two Masters degrees and two careers, found herself strongly attracted to the predictable rhythm of Amish life she encountered. Like her extended retreat, this simple book, describing both the ways of the Amish and their effect upon the author, is an escape for the reader as well. There are glimpses into Amish life: the wagon built to transport benches to the weekly home prayer groups, teenage girls who wear electric blue Nikes under their long black dresses, the democratic selection of a minister by drawing lots, and a no-holds waterfight among the nine Beiler children. Set against this background is Sue Bender's quest to discover inner wealth, to quiet the ramblings of ego, and to explore the part of her existence which values simplicity. With the Amish women as her mentors, she questions the obvious limits of their domain as well as her own frenzied pace. Walking to town one hot sunny day, Sue Bender calls out to the horse-drawn buggies, "Am I on the right road?" It's a question we should all ask ourselves. -- For great reviews of books for girls, check out Let's Hear It for the Girls: 375 Great Books for Readers 2-14. -- From 500 Great Books by Women; review by Marilyn Meyer

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 176 pages
• Publisher: HarperOne; 1 edition (October 18, 1989)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0062500589
• ISBN-13: 978-0062500588
• Product Dimensions: 8.1 x 6 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 3.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (49 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #421,614 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Sue Bender is the author of Plain and Simple: A Woman's Journey to the Amish. The book was a New York Times bestseller.
A fascination with Amish quilts led Sue to live with the Amish in their seemingly timeless world, a landscape of immense inner quiet. This privilege, rarely bestowed upon outsiders, taught her about simplicity and commitment and the contentment that comes from accepting who you are. In that inspiring book, Bender shares the lessons she learned while in the presence of the Amish people.
In Everyday Sacred: A Woman's Journey Home, Bender speaks to our longing to make each day truly count. She chronicles her struggle to bring the joyful wisdom and simplicity she experienced in her sojourn with the Amish back to her hectic, too-much-to-do days at home. Bender discovers for herself, and in the process shows us, that small miracles can be found everywhere - in our homes, in our daily activities and, hardest to see, in ourselves.

Profiles and interviews with Ms. Bender, as well as book excerpts have been published in countless national publications including Reader's Digest, The Washington Post, Ladies' Home Journal, The Chicago Tribune, The Utne Reader, and W Magazine. She has also appeared as a guest on dozens of radio and television shows.

Born in New York City, Sue Bender received her BA from Simmons College and her MA from the Harvard University School of Education. She taught high school in New York and English at the Berlitz School in Switzerland. She later earned a Masters in Social Work from the University of California at Berkeley. During her active years as a family therapist, Bender was founder and Director of CHOICE: The Institute of the Middle Years. In addition to being an author and former therapist, Sue Bender is a ceramic artist and much sought after lecturer nationwide.

She lives in Berkeley, California with her husband Richard, and is the mother of two grown sons.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

41 of 49 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars An interesting but disturbing book, January 17, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Plain and Simple: A Woman's Journey to the Amish (Paperback)

I've long been fascinated by accounts of the lifestyles and beliefs of the Amish. As a parent, I am often overwhelmed by unease about our culture. It's obvious that consumerism is the machine that's driving some of us off the cliff, but few of us (especially thirtysomething women like myself) know how to avoid feelings that we must be the best--we must have it all, we have to be it all. Hoping for some insight, I read Bender's book.

I think what bothered me the most was that Bender's situation between the lines was almost comically present in the book, like watching someone lip-synch to a stuttering recording. I was disturbed that her "resume" as ceramics artist, therapist, and numerous college degrees were offered up more often than, say, specifics about her relationships with her children and husband. SHE is the only person that's affected by her experiences with the Amish. Her "be a star" upbringing, her overachieving, her dislike of housework--all of this is undermined by the tremendous economic and cultural freedom she obviously enjoys. She jets around the country without a thought, and leaving her husband for months at a time never seems to be an issue. A little inner voice tells her to go back to the Amish "to complete the circle", and baby, she's on the next flight. I feel this is why another reviewer on Amazon commented that Bender sounds like she needs a therapist herself.

Her intensity becomes narcissistic because her gaze is focused so strongly on herself. She talks lovingly about the limited choices that Amish life offers when her own life is an amazing example of freedom. She assumes the reader will have patience with her descriptions of the way she works out some of her feelings through her art when she's home--these are by far the most difficult portions of the book. It's almost as if Bender had to add details of how un-Amish she is to improve the contrast between the two worlds.

I feel that we need to rescue our children and families as much as we need to rescue ourselves from being so damn driven to have the best, and have as much of it as possible. There are some insights in this book that I thought could touch a "normal" woman's life, but as I said, you have to be willing to ignore the narrowness of Bender's focus. Bottom line: this book is quick read and the form compliments Bender's observations on Amish life, which are engrossing. However, Bender's "Plain and Simple" message would have been more authentic, more believable, and less irritating if she had been able to show how her insights affected someone other than herself.

23 of 28 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Search Leads to Answers, some yes. some no...nevertheless, March 11, 2000

By A Customer

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Plain and Simple: A Woman's Journey to the Amish (Paperback)

there are, indeed, answers...try reading this book. Its present day American anthropology, and at the least, a personal experience that you'll relate to, and...yes, not relate to. But this book will give you inspiration, and make you question the basics of your own life.

This is personal book. A journal. A journey.

It has a distinct artist flavor to it, (I highly recommend it to artists or those of artist nature and intensity). Some people won't like it. They'll not understand the culture which is indeed, highly controversial, even amoung those who are close neighbors to the Amish, and yes, even among the Amish themselves. You might be intrigued, however, if "Amish" is something new to you.

I grew up in the vicinity of an Amish community that the author describes, and I still visit the area regularly. My family has always deeply appreciated their beliefs, even though my family was from an entirely different culture/religion. Sometimes, many times, we didn't understand...but we recognized that they could create what we couldn't do. My family has many Amish quilts, we've eaten many Amish meals, purchased many of their wares...one of our favorites being one family's delicious Angel Food cakes (all made without electricity). I've seen the Amish plowing their fields, not long after the snow has melted (the last time was 11 months ago), with a team of magnificent horses on a hand-hewn plow that looks like something from a museum (in our culture)...and the scene...yes, so lovely... a scene like a painting that's come to life.... It is easy for people to imagine Van Gogh standing alongside the wooden fence which marks the boundry between horse-drawn plow and automobiles, painting quickly, watching the spirit slowly fade...how long can the Amish avoid technology?

I knew of the Amish, before moving to Boston, and now, that, we're here in Silicon Valley. I happened on this book in the bookshop at Pacific Grove, in fact. It seemed to be a peaceful book, suited for my peaceful weekend getaway.

It turned into more than that. I could relate to the author's curiousity; I could relate to the Amish from my own vague experiences; I could relate to the book as a journey of finding out how one really feels about our Self in this world that's scheduled within 15-minute segments on a Daytimer. I could relate to the importance of life's experiences that don't always involve the stock market and money.

Its an easy read. Nicely experienced after a cup of tea just before bed, where you can privately sigh with a sense of true relaxation.... Yes, (sigh) slow down...read a while, turn off the light and imagine the world you just read about.

But...in the morning...well.... How does it all connect? What is this odd formula that causes these small societies to produce many fine pieces of art? (Or is it, in marketing jargon, just a product?) What is it that pulls these people together? What is it that makes them try something seeming too difficult and seemingly too time-consuming? It is worthwhile, as a bottom-line, to... spend time?

Enjoy.

I'd love to meet the author...even though we have a library of thousands of books, I've only said that about Laurel Thatcher Ulrich, who won the McArthur Award. I have met her briefly. She's wonderful. (She was the advisor to a dear friend of mine at university in NH.)

The "air" of the books are somewhat similar.

"Plain and Simple" is a good book, especially if you like "journal, diary-type" manuscripts. Buy it to try it. It might work for you. It might be just too foreign to you. But it is a good gamble.

26 of 32 people found the following review helpful:

1.0 out of 5 stars I was very disappointed in this book, January 7, 2005

By 

E. Broadhurst (Brno, Czech Republic) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Plain and Simple: A Woman's Journey to the Amish (Paperback)

I was expecting to read a book about the Amish. What I read instead was a very self centered book about a woman searching, rather blindly, I felt, for herself.

She had very little in the way of insight into Amish life, even after spending a period of time with them. And her inability to get outside of her own head/her own life was not terribly interesting to read.

For someone who always longed to be a 'star,' I am sure publishing a book was quite a thrill for her. Shame she used the Amish as a platform for her own ego.