Customer Reviews

Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman: What Men Know About Success that Women Need to Learn

5 star:		(55)
4 star:		(26)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(4)

 

 

If you are a woman and have ever needed a reason to stop taking everything everybody says or does personally, this book says it. This is the guidebook to business that baby-boomer-females-in-the-businessplace never had. Gail Evans has lived what she preaches and speaks in a language women can understand. I was shaking my head "yes" throughout the book, as I recognized my own situation and frustrations in workplace. I knew it had something to do with my gender, but other than pointing the finger of blame at all men, I could not pinpoint what was happening in this male-created domain. I guess I thought I was the only person (read woman) who couldn't figure out the rules for success in the workplace. I also needed to hear the words from a very successful woman who learned by doing. I learned that I can still be a woman, but succeed in the male-created, male-dominated business world, and not feel like an imposter...which is exactly what one of her chapters deals with. You don't have to be a sell-out, but quit taking everything so damn personal....this is business. This is not a book written by a man who thinks he knows what women are thinking. And, it is not a book written by a woman who is so well-connected, or glamorous and beautiful, that you would wonder how she could not be a success in the businessplace. This is a book written by "one of us", and concentrates on exactly why many women struggle so hard to succeed in her job, no matter what that job is. If you are a manager, or a clerk, or anything in between, this book will help you as a female. I am giving a copy of this book to every working woman that I know...with a few exceptions; those who have already figured out the rules. Now I know why they are so successful, and it has nothing to do with their luck and my unluckiness. I feel so much better and unburdened after reading this book. I am going to keep it at my bedside and use it as my affirmation support..."I will not personalize workplace issues...I will not.....".

This book is pitched as one that is helpful for women. I am sure that is the case. Not being a woman, I have to share its benefits from my perspective.

I have been a mentor for many working women, and this book does a nice job of addressing the kinds of issues that the women have brought up with me as well as the ones that I have brought up with them. In the past, I have provided copies of How to Be a Star at Work as a way to assist these women. In the future, I will provide this book, as well.

Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman does an excellent job of explaining how relationships and results need to be balanced at work. That is a juggling act that seems to confuse many women, and I found this book to be accurate and constructive in this area.

Interestingly, I find that a lot of men miss these points, too. I would also recommend this book to male colleagues and subordinates, both to make them more effective and to improve their understanding of how to communicate with female colleagues.

Basically, the book is all about miscommunication and misconception stalls that occur at work, especially the ones that tend to occur among men and women. The book is very effective in exploring those stalls and inproviding sound advice for overcoming the same stalls.

The only weakness I found in the book is that some subtle points about business interactions were missed. A lot of male aggressiveness and bluffing was described as just being acceptable, while the same thing by women is unacceptable. What Ms. Evans missed is that there is usually a kind of kidding humor involved to let everyone know that the aggressor is simply indicating a strong desire to play, backed up by self-confidence. That takes the sting out of the aggressiveness. When some women are aggressive, they often forget to use the kidding humor that makes the aggressiveness tolerable to all.

Perhaps the greatest strength of the book is that it permits the reader to choose her/his own goals (and those may not be material success or power) while adapting the advice to one's own personality and preferences. Basically, any advice we get that suggest we act like the individuals we are is good advice. Well done, Ms. Evans!

I'm thrilled that women like Gail Evans and Nancy Lloyd (author of "SIMPLE MONEY SOLUTIONS: 10 WAYS YOU CAN STOP FEELING OVERWHELMED BY MONEY AND START MAKING IT WORK FOR YOU) are finally in a position to let other women in on the "secrets" of career and financial success.

So many of us have to reinvent the wheel at work and with our finances. Until we learn to play like men at work and with our finances we will never reach our true potential.

I just wish these two books were around when I was starting out--I could have avoided a lot of costly career and financial missteps. There is sage wisdom in both books!

As women we need to educate ourselves about the business and financial worlds. For finances I strongly recommend "SIMPLE MONEY SOLUTIONS: 10 WAYS YOU CAN STOP FEELING OVERWHELEMED BY MONEY AND START MAKING IT WORK FOR YOU," by Nancy Lloyd. Nancy is the personal finance commentator for NPR's Morning Edition, a former Federal Reserve Board Economist and a former IBM executive and tells you the insider secrets that most financial planners will not reveal. It's a quick read but brimming with important and easy-to-follow financial moves. "PLAY LIKE A MAN, WIN LIKE A WOMAN" shows you the insider secrets about how men play in the corporate world. Both books will prepare you and your daughters (or even sons) to make their way in the real world without shooting themselves in the foot.

I have owned my own business for years, and I disagree with virtually all of this book. While it has some snippets of good advice for women [don't be hesitant, apologetic or act unsure], it also had some ridiculous inconsistencies and stereotypes.

For example, Evans almost worships the way men do things, and portrays all women as incompetent at business, given their alleged stereotypical upbringing of playing with dolls and nurturing. She reinforces every negative stereotype about women. She discusses how men are naturally confident, and suggests that women pretend they are confident, even if they are not; however, in a later chapter, she says, "be yourself; be a woman; use your feminine wiles," because if you pretend, they will see through you. That's just not consistent advice.

She says women must appear serious about their work; but then later says it won't hurt your career to go off on the "Mommy track" for a few years. That is simply unrealistic in most companies.

In early chapters, she says women have to demand what they feel they deserve in the workplace just like men; yet, at the end of the book she contradicts this by grousing about how men can get away with things we women can't [they are allowed to get angry and be rude, fat and ugly; we absolutely cannot]. So which is it? Do we try to act like them; or like women; hard to tell from this rambling and inconsistent book.

Finally, the worst advice of all! She tells women they can contribute more to society and their careers by trying to work their way up in a large corporation, rather than leaving to start their own business, or by getting more fulfilling work at a smaller employer. This is preposterous. Even Ms. Evans is not at the top of the heap at CNN, and probably never will be. Her book is to justify her own choices.

As a woman who left a very successful career in a male-dominated field to start her own very successful business, I would recommend to women looking for career advice that, unless they want to spend their career working in the middle of a giant corporation, and being an employee all their life, don't bother reading this book.

If you are under 35, then this book is probably not for you. The author describes a number of supposed women who I just do not recognize in myself or my friends. These women are the ones who just do not get it, that is the male game of business. The author of course, is one of the few women who does get it. In fact the author treats most women as if they were 1950s steryotypes who somehow found themselves timewarped to today. For the most part the advice was un-believably poor and quite frankly sexist. The author seems to have collected steryotypes of the working women and come up with an ape the man approach to counter the steryotype. There are far too many sporting analogies and one is left with the feeling that the author has never really played competitve female team sports. If she had she would know that girls like to win too. Often she borders on the ridiculous. For example she suggests that women can take 10 years off to raise their children and re-enter the work force without any delay or negative effect to their career. She neglets the fact that today, the pace of management and technical evolution is so great that no one, man or women, can easily re-enter the work force after a ten year absence. In making such a claim she does not turn to statistical evidence, rather, she draws from her own experience. While taking time off to raise the kids she was involved in part-time businesses, charity work, by her own account she "managed the Moscow bureau for three years" and had a fleet of baby sitters and maids who looked after the house and kids. This is not really "takeing time off" to raise the kids, nor does it have any relavance to those women with children who can not afford her extravagant support system.

Finally there is no attempt to adress real issues such as the challenge of raising a family while working and simultaneously having a great professional life. She does not engage in any serious reflections on gender attitudes to work, nor does she adress the real steryotypes that women endure, such as a "women with children should be at home", or "women are not prime income earners so we can pay them less", or "women will leave and have kids anyway so they are more costly to my business then a man." I particularily disliked the section on wife, daughter, mother, misstress where the author states these are the only kinds of women men know how to relate to (don't they have sisters?), so you must choose which role you will play at work. Seriously young professional women today prefer to be considered a worker when at work and a wife, mother, daughter or mistress only in their private life. I really regret having bought this book.

Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman is described as being helpful for women. I am sure that is the case.

Not being a woman, I have to share its benefits from my perspective.

I have enjoyed being a mentor for many working women, and this book does a nice job of addressing the kinds of issues that these women have brought up with me as well as the ones that I have brought up with them. In the past, I have provided copies of How to Be a Star at Work as a way to assist these women. In the future, I will provide this book, as well.

Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman does an excellent job of explaining how the emphasis on relationships and results need to be balanced at work. That is a juggling act that seems to confuse many women, and I found this book to be accurate and constructive in this area.

Interestingly, I find that a lot of men miss these points, too. In these cases, the results are usually overemphasized at the expense of the relationships. I will also recommend this book to male colleagues and subordinates, both to make them more effective and to improve their understanding of how to communicate with female colleagues.

Basically, the book is all about miscommunication and misconception stalls that occur at work, especially the ones that tend to occur among men and women. The book is very effective in exploring those stalls and inproviding sound advice for overcoming the same stalls.

The only weakness I found in the book is that some subtle points about business interactions were missed. A lot of male aggressiveness and bluffing was described as just being acceptable, while the same thing by women is unacceptable. What Ms. Evans missed is that there is usually a kind of kidding humor involved to let everyone know that the aggressor is simply indicating a strong desire to play, backed up by self-confidence. That posture takes the sting out of the aggressiveness. When some women are aggressive, they may forget to use the kidding humor and relaxed tone that makes the aggressiveness tolerable to all.

Perhaps the greatest strength of the book is that it permits the reader to choose her/his own goals (and those may not be material success or power) while adapting the advice to one's own personality and preferences. Basically, any advice we get that suggest we act like the individuals we are is good advice.

After you read and apply this book, I suggest that you think about applying it to nonwork situations, as well. Your focus on relationships versus results may be out of balance in those circumstances, too.

Find the perfect balance!

Could be subtitled; How Not To Shoot Yourself in the Foot. I'd like to join in with the positive reviews of this book. I'm a business school student and I read this book on the recommendation of a visiting female executive. I've since lent it out to my classmates and have watched it be passes around from woman to woman. We love it! Evans offers simple, easy to relate to examples of behavior women adopt in the workplace that can be "career limiting." She openly challenges the reader to see which of her observations fit and which don't to each woman's unique situation. A well balanced, honest set of suggestions and observations that will benefit any woman seeking to advance in her career.

I thoroughly enjoyed the author's book because it enlightened me, as a manager, on areas that need to be discussed with my team members, such as career progression and fair play. I personally will benefit from her ideas--the book is chock full of them. Highly Recommend it.

Also recommend "The Leader's Guide: 15 Essential Skills" --- which is a great book on management.

Gail Evans shares her vast corporate experience with women on the way up, giving them a glimpse at the playbook men in business have instinctively used for years. All working women need to read this to learn how they may be unwittingly holding themselves back from achieving the success they want at work. Men need to read it to learn more about themselves, and more about the women who may some day be their bosses.