Pleasing People: How not to be an "approval junkie" [Paperback]

Lou Priolo (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: December 1, 2007

Are you a people pleaser? Are you addicted to approval from others, and would do just about anything to get that approval Biblical counselor Lou Priolo exposes all the prideful manifestations of this problem and, as always, offers solid, systematic Biblical solutions! Even readers who feel that they do not have this problem should read this helpful book, because what you don t know can and will hurt you and others.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

<div>Lou Priolo is the director of Biblical Counseling at Eastwood Presbyterian Church in Montgomery, Alabama. A graduate of Calvary Bible College and Liberty University, he is the author of The Heart of Anger, The Complete Husband, and Getting A Grip. Lou is also a Fellow in the National Association of Nouthetic Counselors.</div>

Product Details

• Paperback: 256 pages
• Publisher: P & R Publishing (December 1, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1596380551
• ISBN-13: 978-1596380554
• Product Dimensions: 9.2 x 5.8 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #134,375 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

34 of 34 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Convicting Book, August 23, 2007

By 

Tim Challies (Oakville, Ontario) - See all my reviews
(TOP 1000 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Pleasing People: How not to be an "approval junkie" (Paperback)

Are you an approval junkie? Are you a person who depends too heavily, in spirit, conscience or morale, on the approval of others? How would you even know? These are the questions Lou Priolo tackles in his book Pleasing People. This is a book I read weeks ago and, for some reason, decided not to review. Yet over the weeks I've seen the fruit of reading this book in my life and in my walk with the Lord. I've seen shadows of the desire to please people not only in my life but in the lives of others. I felt it would be best for me to share the book with others.

Priolo is the Director of the Center for Biblical Counseling at Eastwood Presbyterian Church in Montgomery, Alabama and has been a counselor and instructor for almost twenty years. As such he has had ample opportunity to see the ramifications of depending too heavily on the approval of others. He has seen the negative consequences of attempting to find meaning and purpose in the approval of other people. His experience brings value to this book.

The book is divided into two sections: Our Problem and God's Solution. In the first half Priolo takes on the difficult but loving task of attempting to convict the reader of sin by bringing to bear the testimony of Scripture. He is not unaware of the difficulty and responsibility this brings. "The though of my trying to convict you of your sin may seem like a rather severe (if not unsympathetic) approach to encourage you to change, but it is actually a very loving approach. The truth is, what we will be discussing in this book is not a sickness (or a psychological disorder) for which there is no cure; it is not a genetic predisposition that you as a Christian will be forced to live with for the rest of your life. It is simply a sin. And Jesus Christ came to do away with our sin." And this is where the gospel comes in and where we come to the second half of the book. Having shown people pleasing to be what it is, Priolo allows the Word of God to show how we can please God instead of men.

Like all books that seek to bring a person into conformity to God's requirements, there is a danger of legalism intruding, of trying to change apart from the work of Christ and the power of the Spirit. Priolo carefully guards against this and warns of its attraction. "In some places [in this book], the righteous requirement of the law is emphasized; in other places, the grace of God is clearly the predominant theme. In some places, faith apart from works is taught; elsewhere, faith is tied to one's works. When you put it all together, you understand that we are saved by faith alone, but not the kind of faith that is alone."

And so he wades into the discussion. Like I expect most readers to feel, I began reading quite convinced that, though interesting, the book had little to offer me. But I was wrong. As I began to read the descriptions of a person who depends too heavily on the approval of others, and as I began to inventory my heart through the criteria presented, I was soon pierced and began to see how this sin exists in my life. And best of all I was able to see how it can be made right through the power of the Spirit in my life. And, though it is always easier to see sin in the lives of other people, this book equipped me to see how other people I know can depend too much on the approval of others and ways I can gently reach out to them to see this sin.

Written in a very logical fashion (which reminds me a great deal of the Matthias Media books I have read), Priolo's argument and biblical remedy are easy to follow and easy to understand. He is clear in the diagnosis, clear in the scope of the problem, and clear in the remedy. He relies on the Bible to point the way and simply relates the truth of Scripture. As we would expect based on the author's source, the book is convicting to be sure, but it also brings hope. I'm glad to recommend it, especially to those who are sure it has nothing to offer them.

25 of 26 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars FINALLY! Help that sinks in and changes your perspective!!!!!!, March 11, 2007

By 

a reader (U.S.A.) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Pleasing People: How not to be an "approval junkie" (Paperback)

If you are a person who feels constant guilt for 'not returning a phone call', for overcommiting outside of your home *even at church...(when your family clearly needs you), for spending a good part of your day thinking of 'friends who are frustrated with you for dissapointing them' ......THEN THIS BOOK IS FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!
Lou has written what we all need to hear!
This book is extrememly 'user friendly' and after only a chapter, I was walking through my days with a completely different outlook....and continue to.
This book sinks in and changes your perspective of who it is we strive to please everday. There is much freedom in this book and it is one that I have continued to go buy more and more copies to give out!
A message we all need to hear!!!! You will not be sorry for reading this one....a wealth of practical help!

12 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Wonderful Book, April 10, 2007

By 

Jonathan D. Holmes "AKJonathanHolmes" (Jackson Township, Ohio) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Pleasing People: How not to be an "approval junkie" (Paperback)

I read this book in one sitting. For biblical counselors, this is a must-read on the topic of fear of man and people addiction!