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2.2 out of 5 stars
Porkchop
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6 of 8 people found the following review helpful
on May 12, 2012
Ok. I give it four stars. The first hour of this movie kind of drags though. It would have been nice after the inital killings in the beginning if there was something else within that first hour. With that being said, the last half hour really moves along and is FUN! Loved the original killings. Rob Cobb, who plays Porkchop, did an outstanding job in both Porkchop and Porkchops. I assume he is the killer in the 3D version they are working on now. He really nailed the part and is honestly one of the best parts of the movie. Camera work and angles were used very nicely. Loved the original killings and for an indie film they did a good job with the effects. I am a huge fan of 3D so I am really looking forward to the third one as well.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
on March 31, 2013
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And didn't see any. I bought this on a recommendation and was left disappointed. Avoid this movie unless you just can't control your curiosity.
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
on July 19, 2012
I'm glad I didn't pay much for this, but what I did pay, was not worth it. This is a poorly-made indie film, that is supposed to take place in the 80's, but that aspect is just as unconvincing as the rest of the film. The usual group of brainless teens go to the woods to get slaughtered by the usual stereotyped dude in a pig mask with a chainsaw. You've seen it before, and it's been done better. Don't bother.
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4 of 6 people found the following review helpful
on December 12, 2011
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Porkchop is a new slasher movie that pays homage to slasher classics like Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Friday the 13th. Unfortunately, despite some cool moments here and there and a few laughs, it is lacking. The killer in this one wears a pig mask, and he is an awesome killer. The trouble is that he really doesn't get that much screen time. There is some decent gore, but some of the deaths aren't that great. And I was expecting more humor than I got, being that this is supposed to be a satire. Don't expect the brilliant silliness of Caesar And Otto's Summer Camp Massacre. The movie does have some T & A, and even some brief male nudity for the ladies and gay men. Porkchop is okay, but it could have been so much more.
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2 of 3 people found the following review helpful
on January 31, 2012
Porkchop is more of an 80's set horror comedy than an 80's style one. Some of the jokes are actually pretty funny and the actresses are cute, but this could have used more nudity and gore--there isn't nearly enough of either for this one to merit a strong recommendation.
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I have watched Porkchop twice now. I am still undecided about whether I really like it or not. I watch it and then 2 weeks later I have forgotten the plot, the actors, the scenes, everything. it is like the movie that gives amnesia. I gave it 4 stars as I did watch it twice, it can't be that bad, I just wish I remember what happened...
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on July 22, 2013
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There is a wavy set of lines on the DVD...like it was created in production. It's not scratched. It is a wavy looking thing on there that makes it freeze...didn't even get past the credits
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on October 21, 2014
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This movie was enjoyable as hell. Yes it's shoddy. Yes it's clearly made by some amateurs (and I mean that in a kind way) somewhere outside of Hollywood...but it's also clear that they love what they do and this film is a fun result!
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1 of 2 people found the following review helpful
on January 24, 2014
The lowest form of cinema, right down there with porn if you ask me. No consideration for the viewers enjoyment. The acting, writing and direction are non-existing. I wouldn't recommend this to even the most desperate of horror fans. Better things are produced for free on YouTube. This is a classic example of how you cant create a cool dvd cover with a pig holding a chainsaw and assume people will get in line. The fact that these filmmakers thought that sequels were a good idea is the definition of audacity!
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1 of 2 people found the following review helpful
on June 24, 2013
Well, I'd been kind of looking forward to seeing this movie, as it had a cool hand drawn cover of the title character and the tagline bragged of 80's style horror. I was really hoping that I'd have some fun with this film, so I decided to pop it in tonight and see what it was all about. Well, what it seemed to be all about was breaking the cardinal rule of low budget horror films: Do Not Be Boring!

Porkchop is a no-budget movie shot on video, and it starts off terribly with an awful heavy metal tune titled "Porkchop" running over the opening credits of real footage of pigs being butchered in a slaughterhouse. As far as disturbing, or gross, this would be the highlight of the film.

It's the classic tale of getting a group of buddies together to go on a camping trip out in the woods where a rural legend just happens to still be around. We have six "buddies", and one robot. You heard me right, a robot is among the cast for the entire movie, spouting off terrible one liners and being the most annoying of all of the annoying characters in the movie. That's another big no-no that this movie has in store for us. There is not one character to root for in the film. Not one of them would we miss if they ended up on the end of Porkchop's chainsaw. The only thing that seemed to matter to me was hoping that all of the female characters got topless at least once. That one wish was almost fulfilled, as our lead female character does not lose her clothes during the film.

There were some characters that were so bad at acting that I wondered if there was even a script being used at some points. Some of the lines being read, or made up were so poorly acted that I wanted to hide my face in shame for them. I sure hope they got paid well, but somehow I doubt it. Taking a camera into the woods, and filming your friends trying to do scary things can be fun for the people doing it, but not always fun for the people that get to watch what you've made out of it.

The film had no sense of urgency, no atmosphere, no tension, and worst of all, no action at all until the one hour mark. Any attempts among the characters to make any type of jokes or humor fall completely flat. The only interesting time I had was during the campfire scene when the legend of Porkchop was told. It seemed to be the only part of the movie that drew me in for a few minutes, and was quickly discarded as the characters reverted back to their boring nature after that one scene was completed. No matter how many times the actors referenced different 80's icons, it did not look or feel anything like an 80's film like it had been advertised as. And seeing female teenage (supposedly) characters with tattoos and tramp stamps didn't help create any 80's vibe either.

Yes, this film was a disappointment for a lot of reasons. As little as I could let myself get into the film, I still saw mistakes that the filmmakers must have seen themselves and didn't want to, or couldn't afford to fix. A girl has no flashlight in one scene, then suddenly she has one in the next. Even so bad as to start a kill with a long handled buzz saw, and finish the scene with the killer holding a chainsaw. Inexcusable. There is no reason at all that you should need to see this film, unless you choose morbid curiosity, and then you'll just be torturing yourself. 2/10.
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