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Power Money Fame Sex: A User's Guide [Paperback]

Gretchen Rubin
3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (24 customer reviews)


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Book Description

August 28, 2001
Learn from Michael Jordan, Robert Moses, Machiavelli, and Madonna - here at last is the guide for using power, money, fame, and sex that describes what actually works, rather than what ought to work. Instructive, ruthless, subversive, and entertaining, "Power Money Fame Sex" reveals the mysteries of office politics and personal posturing. Whether you're gunning for a promotion, a trophy wife, the cover of "Time", or a very early retirement, you'll find the secrets laid bare in this indispensable guide. Here you'll find clear explanations with illustrations, tips, and quizzes, ready for use Monday morning. Lurking beneath this blunt advice is a piercing social critique - why we would choose to become a self-promoter, a bully, or a tease. Once you understand the tactics found here, will you decide how to use them or abuse them? Whether the intricate code exposed in "Power Money Fame Sex" inspires or infuriates you, remember: if these rules aren't working for you, they're working against you.


Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

If the title of this book sounds about as silly as a headline from Mademoiselle or Cosmopolitan, rest assured: author Gretchen Craft Rubin has highbrow credentials. An adjunct professor at Yale University and former editor in chief of The Yale Law Journal, she was also a clerk for the U.S. Supreme Court under Justice Sandra Day O'Connor and served as counsel to Federal Communications Commission chairman Reed Hundt. The book's references are highbrow, too, with Rubin quoting and alluding to everyone from Machiavelli and Sun Tzu to Plutarch, Shakespeare, and Edith Wharton.

That said, the book is still rather, well, silly, albeit more fun and dishy than the average book on getting ahead. It's sort of what you'd expect if People magazine or US Weekly were to put out career guides. Here we learn all sorts of traits that mark the powerful (Ronald Reagan reinstated much of the pomp of the presidency after it was clear the public hadn't gone for President Carter's "common man" approach); the rich (Christina Onassis had her 10-seater airplane fly between France and New York once a week to ship her 100 bottles of Diet Coke, which wasn't available in France); the very famous (Madonna's bodyguards forbad the staff of a hotel where she was staying to speak her name, talk to, or so much as directly look at her); and the sexy (Marilyn Monroe was reputed to have cut a quarter-inch off the heel of one shoe to achieve her legendary "wiggling" walk).

Unfortunately, the book is more effective in relating these anecdotes--what people have done once they've achieved power, wealth, fame, or sexiness (which, of course, involves varying amounts of the prior three characteristics, depending on whom one is trying to attract), or what we, humble readers, might do ourselves once we arrive--than it is in telling us how to get there ourselves. It's a bit like a title it even mentions once, the early 1980s hit The Official Preppy Handbook. That little item also purported to be a how-to, but its delineation of a clearly inbred, elitist lifestyle was meant to be laughed at as much as it was to be taken seriously. Not that you won't learn anything here--far from it: Power Money Fame Sex is astute on every page. It's simply that the thing appears designed to entertain more than to actually edify poor slobs like the rest of us. --Timothy Murphy --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Publishers Weekly

Wisdom and fun abound on every page of this delicious hybrid of two popular genres: self-help and lifestyles-of-the-rich-and-famous. Gleefully offering strategic advice for the unabashedly ambitious (e.g., "If you're charismatic, make sure you have writers and historians around you"), Craft Rubin distills key research findings into True Rules of alarming simplicity, such as "Those who marry for money earn every penny" and "Succs de scandale is better than no succs at all." Decked out in a kicky graphic design, the primary text is interspersed with useful tips ("Never give anonymously"), photographs of celebrities flaunting their privileges and quotations from writers as diverse as Henry Adams and Judith Krantz. An adjunct professor at the Yale Law School, Craft Rubin offers generous servings of dish on such subjects as the number of times a day the late duchess of Windsor had her hair done, and spins through a discussion of crassly calculating tactics with apparent ease, in a tone adeptly balanced between dead-seriousness and tongue-in-cheek humor. Chapters on the blues associated with scaling the heights of power, money, fame and/or sex will prove reassuring to all who have fallen short of their personal goals in these areas. Craft Rubin's hilarious categories of "trustafarians," "split-erati," "fame parasites," "stalker-azzi," "arm candy" and "jackpots" could easily pass into common parlance as exactly the right terms for the most obnoxiously self-absorbed climbers in any chic coterie. Agents, Christy Fletcher and Michael Carlisle. (Sept.)
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 320 pages
  • Publisher: Atria (August 28, 2001)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0671041290
  • ISBN-13: 978-0671041298
  • Product Dimensions: 9.2 x 6.2 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 14.7 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (24 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #367,657 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

I'm the author of "Happier at Home" and "The Happiness Project," about my experiences as I test-drove the wisdom of the ages, current scientific studies, and lessons from popular culture about how to be happy, to see what really worked. Happily, both books became New York Times bestsellers.

On my blog, www.happiness-project.com, I write about my daily adventures in happiness.

My previous books include a bestselling biography of Winston Churchill, "Forty Ways to Look at Winston Churchill," and one of John Kennedy, "Forty Ways to Look at JFK." My first book, "Power Money Fame S..: A User's Guide," is social criticism in the guise of a user's manual. "Profane Waste" was a collaboration with artist Dana Hoey. I've also written three dreadful novels that are safely locked away in a drawer.

Before turning to writing, I had a career in law. A graduate of Yale and Yale Law School, I clerked for Justice Sandra Day O'Connor and was editor-in-chief of the Yale Law Journal. I live in New York City with my husband and two daughters.

Customer Reviews

3.8 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
59 of 64 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An Amoral Guide to Modern Striving . . . and Nonstriving September 6, 2000
Format:Hardcover
...This is both a guide and an antiguide, according toMs. Rubin. "If you're a striver, you'll find material to spur you on." "If you're a nonstriver, . . . you can use the guide defensively . . . ." Much like Machiavelli before her, then, the information can be used in a variety of ways. The information itself is described in morally neutral ways (hence, amoral). That point will upset many people, much as the moral neutrality (and supreme practicality) of Machiavelli does.

How can one be neutral about the subject of using other people for base pleasures? Perhaps no one can. Upon closer inspection, some elements of the book are not so neutral. For example, there is something morally uplifting about having a negative reaction to the grubby details of striving for more power, money, fame and sex! This is an important point because much of what you read in this book has to cause you to disapprove. I imagine few will be inspired by the image of the business tycoon who yells so loudly at subordinates that they are constantly drenched in saliva in addition to having their ears and egos abused. Few women will be enthralled by the descriptions of athletes who send seating attendants to proposition female fans for a quick interlude before locker room interviews begin after the game.

Ms. Rubin also sneaks in the consequences in another way. Each section ends in a discussion of "the blues" -- the downside of having achieved one's strivings. Many people find themselves profoundly unhappy. Thoughtful people will wonder why bother if the results aren't worth the candle. That undoubtedly had to be the intent of including these smuggled antigratification observations into a book about how to strive to get these gratifications....

For the careful observer, there's a potential voyage of self-discovery here. She bluntly asks you to consider why you want power, money, fame, and sex. On the surface, this seems to be because some people are confused about means and ends...There are many confusions among the strivers outlined in the book.

What is missing, though, is any consideration of satisfaction beyond the moment. For example, the power section helps you figure out whether you get more pleasure for direct power (authority) or indirect power (influence). Neither links however to the idea of using the power for some greater good...

At its best, this book is much like Robert Cialdini's excellent book, Influence, in looking effectively at how we respond to each other. Ms. Rubin is a very astute observer of human nature and social situations. I was very interested in her list of common themes that showed up in all four gratification categories:

-- signaling (act, dress, and speak for the role you want)

-- sprezzatura (show only a graceful, easy carelessness that hide your strivings)

-- dis-expectation (to demonstrate your triumph, reverse expectations . . . such as the CEO who shows up for an important formal meeting in suit and sneakers)

-- platinum rule (to whom much is given, more is given)

-- the blues (satisfying these urges doesn't tell you how to be happy)

Now reverse your role, and imagine that instead of using this information to strive you want to use it to guard against rampages by wanton strivers. Now, the book starts to get more interesting. The phoniness behind many of the otherwise powerful public displays is revealed here, much like showing a magician's secrets...We are encouraged to test these public displays, quietly and gently, and often . . . the balloon will pop. In fact, we should normally expect it to.

Viewed from the "protection against phony strivers" perspective, this book is better than moralizing in some ways. The primary advantage is that it will make more phony posturing observable as such. As a result, it will also help people better understand the posturing that is going on around them, how to deal with it, and how to overcome it when necessary. I see that as a major advance!

Although the book rarely deals with it, there is one area where these are considered purely as techniques . . . and you can begin to see them as such. Techniques, by themselves, can be helpful for good as well as for gratification. This point seems to be made by some of the examples at the ends of the four sections for power, money, fame and sex. Consider Anne. She has a choice of offices, and takes the one nearest the boss. Discovering that he is shy, she makes it her business to communicate with him in ways he finds comfortable. She buys lunch where he does, and carries it back to her desk to eat in as he does every day. They become confidantes. When he is promoted, she gets his old job, and everyone finds that natural. She has made herself his deputy, de facto, even though she never had that job.

Before leaving the book, I must observe that the major danger of a work like this is to make those who want harmful ends more effective in some cases. We will all have to be on our toes more than usual after a book like this. Many will justifiably point at that creating this moral danger makes any amoral book, in fact, immoral. I certainly came out that way. But I left this point to near the end in order to leave the field open to your judgment.

Whether you decide this book is totally serious, immoral, a satire, a useful guide to get things that will make you unhappy, or something else, I suspect it will intrigue you. I have never seen a book quite like it. Having opened Pandora's Box, we all need a dose of this book to help innoculate us from the ills it can generate...Go beyond that to consider the leaders who matter in your life, and examine how they are using these levers. After you have demystified your world in this way, pick a worthy goal and some ethical techniques . . . and see what you can accomplish. I suspect that the combination of a virtuous end and ethical, effective means will make you much more irresistible.

Read more ›

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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A brilliant and comprehensive view into human behavior November 4, 2005
Format:Paperback
From reading the 22 previous reviews of Ms. Rubin's PMFS to date, it appears that people either loved it or hated it. To those who hated it, I would suggest that they are reacting to her words as if they were prescriptions, rather than the unjudgemental description of human behavior that I believe the book to be. Ms. Rubin is not advocating for anything here. She is merely describing how people act with one another in modern society. If someone finds what Ms. Rubin has written to be shocking, I'd suggest that this is only because she portrays human conduct so accurately. I'm don't believe that Ms. Rubin is saying anything new. What is new, is that she has compiled an extensive, well-organized catalog of human behavior as it relates to PMF and S. Further, she provides the answer to the moral qualms on the last two pages.

I thought so much of her cold wisdom that I put the book in the mail to my son at college today, in the hope that Ms. Rubin's insights will help him weather life's storms a little better. First Corinthians this is not, but neither should it be. That kind of wisdom is available elsewhere. Ms. Rubin's kind of wisdom is harder to come by.

Ms. Rubin's facts are astonishly abundant, and clearly illustrate her points ("true facts"...I think is how she puts it.) It would be interesting if the book had been footnoted rather than just a selected bibliography, but perhaps that would be gilding the lily. Maybe, I just want to know where she found all this out.

I am rapidly becoming an enormous fan of Ms. Rubin's works, and regret that she is not making a tour to promote her newest work about JFK. I would pay good money to sit for an evening and listen to what Ms Rubin has to say.
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars PMFS Edifies and Entertains January 9, 2007
Format:Paperback
Each page of this gem is jammed with both trivia and wisdom, and I devoured it like a guilty pleasure. But the book is more than that. Like any good satire, this book operates and succeeds on many levels.

I came to Rubin's writing through her current work on The Happiness Project, of which I am a committed reader. Rubin's blog (........) -- where she reports on her experiments to bring more happiness into her life -- is brimming with earnestness. So when I started Power, Money, I was expecting more of that sweet, earnest voice. Instead, I saw her brilliantness and wit. Rubin obviously has the ability to pitch her voice perfectly to each project.

Now, I'm off to tackle her "Forty Ways," books. If anyone could get me excited to read about political machinations, it's Rubin.
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5 of 7 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Fabulously in Your Face January 30, 2001
Format:Hardcover
Gretchen writes with a wonderful "in your face style" that I found refreshing. The title of the book is not only an author's "Keyword Dream" but the book answers the how to questions implied in each of those words. This is not fluff reading. If you are easily offended by the way the world really is out there, read another book. If you want to see life in the fast lane, here it is. This book is a winner. Kevin Hogan, ...
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7 of 10 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars HUMOROUS BOOK - tons of fun to read February 13, 2002
Format:Hardcover
I bought this book after stumbling across it in the sociology section at Borders. I flipped through it and found some humorous and insightful comments and decided to buy it to lighten up my reading, as I primarily read Peter Drucker, other management books and some philosophy. I thought the book would be some light-hearted humor and I wasn't disappointed!

The author, Gretchen Craft Rubin, is an extremely witty woman. While her background is law the book has tons of comments from famous historical figures such as Machiavelli, Sun Tzu, Plutarch, Shakespeare, and Edith Wharton.

The book is segmented, as expected, into the 4 sections described in the title (POWER MONEY FAME SEX).

Each section provides some unique insight into human behavior, some examples in recent history and tons of witty comments from historical figures

Here are just some of the examples but, just so you know, the book is not in quotation form.

"People believe, and research proves, that high-status men attract more women easily than low-status men."

"The sex that accompanies your success is a nice perk for all your hard work - a pleasant, convenient way to demonstrate the status you've achieved."

"They envy the pleasures they imagine you've won. Perception drives reality, and your status swells accordingly. "

Playboy Donald Trump "When we walk into a restaurant, I watch grown men weep." He was watching other men's reaction to his date, not his date herself.

Jack Kennedy reported "once I get a woman, I'm not interested in carrying on, for the most part." He was pursuing conquests, not relationships.

LBJ "Goddamn it, I had more women by accident than he ever had by design....

"The more money, fame and power you have the more easily you can have casual sex."

Anyways, I can go on and on about the book but I will not. BUY THE BOOK, enjoy it as it is fairly easy reading and, at 270 pages well worth the price of the insights and humor delivered. Read more ›

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Most Recent Customer Reviews
1.0 out of 5 stars Eeeehhh
I personally didn't like this book, and I didn't even read the entire thing. It just didn't "do it" for me. Read more
Published 16 months ago by Jodi E. Eldred
4.0 out of 5 stars commentary more than manual
This book serves as an interesting and sometimes eye-opening look at how power, money, fame, and sex are gained and used. Read more
Published on March 12, 2007 by H. Bowman
4.0 out of 5 stars Weird but true
Parody or self-help book? Well, B&N believes the latter: they really do have it shelved in the "self-improvement" section. Read more
Published on February 23, 2001
5.0 out of 5 stars A life changer
By far the most useful book I've read since Geneology of Morals -- and twice as humorous! Brava Ms. Craft Rubin, Brava.
Published on November 6, 2000
5.0 out of 5 stars Empowering the Nice Guys
After reading POWER MONEY FAME SEX, I realized that most, if not all, of the successful people I know use the principles described in this book. Read more
Published on November 3, 2000
5.0 out of 5 stars People, please!
For all of you pseudo-intellectuals reviewing this book with ramblings about literature and flower-power, get a life! Read more
Published on October 24, 2000
1.0 out of 5 stars expert in academia, novitiate in tales of real people
There are very few Lisa Birnbachs, fewer still good anecdotalists,and virtually no readable satirists. Read more
Published on October 21, 2000
3.0 out of 5 stars a ridiculous, tacky puff pastry : good fun, minimal depth
this is yet another repackaging of the lets pretend we're big deal machiavellians school of recipe books. Read more
Published on October 19, 2000
3.0 out of 5 stars why the games?
Wouldn't it be nice if people could just be themselves?
Published on October 14, 2000 by QuestionsforYourSoul
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