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Practically Perfect in Every Way [Hardcover]

Jennifer Niesslein (Author)
4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)


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Book Description

May 17, 2007
A wry, perceptive, and witty examination of our relentless need for self-improvement by the admittedly imperfect founding coeditor of the award-winning quarterly Brain, Child: The Magazine for Thinking Mothers.

Jennifer Niesslein-writer, editor, mother, and flawed human being-spent two years taking self-help advice in an effort to become a better, happier person. Fulfilling her goal of enlightened self-improvement begins with the relatively mundane (her house), moves on toward progressively larger themes (money, marriage, motherhood), and ends up with karmic insights into the burning issues of life (spirituality and meaning). As she allows an array of self-help experts-from Dr. Phil to the Fly Lady, pediatrician William Sears to holistic health guru Dr. Andrew Weil-to copilot her life, Niesslein sometimes finds herself in terra incognita. She runs through her house throwing items away. She communicates with her husband in three-minute speeches. She encourages her first-grader to dream up revenge fantasies. She searches for holy water. At one point, she is even possessed-briefly-by the spirit of a conservative talk-radio host. Although the road to self-help Nirvana is fraught with peril, she discovers that there is such a thing as the good life. It's just a question of how perfect you have to be to get it.

With her irreverent sensibility and uncanny insight into the Zeitgeist, Jennifer Niesslein takes on our uniquely American preoccupation with the perfectibility of man and turns it squarely on its ear.


Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Impelled by Oprah to wonder if people can really control their own destinies, Brain, Child magazine cofounder Niesslein binges on the advice of bestselling self-help books. She delves into feng shui expert Karen Kingston's decluttering tips and techniques to spiritually cleanse the home using bells and holy water. She explores the genius of relationships maven Dr. Laura Schlessinger at pushing the right emotional buttons (is Niesslein guilty of making her husband feel he's not a priority in her life?). The self-improvement experts can't help Niesslein expel her stubborn six-year-old from the bed he's been happily sharing with his parents; Dale Carnegie's and Dear Abby's advice on cultivating friends and becoming popular make her feel both superficial and exhausted; and Jorge Cruise's eight-minute exercise workout is "like throwing a few lima beans in a hot fudge sundae." Although she touches on hot spots that concern most readers—family, home, health and finances—the self-help book angle feels contrived and stale, the jokey self-deprecation forced and some of Niesslein's analyses are tedious, such as a chapter on financial freedom that devolves into a primer on Roth IRAs and mutual funds. (May)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

"Her self-effacing, genuine tone adds to the warmth and fun of Practically Perfect in Every Way." -- Bitch Magazine

"The results are alternatingly hilarious and head-scratching." -- NPR's "Day by Day"

"The book's tone is conversational and funny ... but also, at times, serious and contemplative. ... In the end, Niesslein says, self-help made her life both a little more perfect, and a little less so." -- Salon.com

"What makes this book so revelatory is Jennifer's carefully balanced combo of open-mindedness and critical thinking." -- The Feminist Review

One of "the season's most promising books." -- Washington Post

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 352 pages
  • Publisher: Putnam Adult (May 17, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0399153918
  • ISBN-13: 978-0399153914
  • Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 5.7 x 1.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #869,604 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

16 Reviews
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4 star:
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3 star:
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Average Customer Review
4.1 out of 5 stars (16 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

38 of 38 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Funny and thought-provoking, May 18, 2007
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This review is from: Practically Perfect in Every Way (Hardcover)
I really looked forward to this book since I love the magazine that Jennifer Niesslein helped create, Brain Child. I was not disappointed. This is a funny book, and I laughed many times. For instance, here is the author, describing her imagined discussion with a Catholic priest: "I tried to picture the exchange between us, but the furthest I could get was a cartoon version of me standing before a cartoon version of him. We would have thought bubbles above our heads. Mine: Has he EVER had sex? EVER? His: Does she know she's supposed to be obeying her husband?

This is also a thought-provoking book. Niesslein bravely delves into a topic that many people worry about but don't often discuss: mainly, what is happiness, do I have it, and if I don't have it, how do I get it? She pursues happiness, literally, by reading and gamely putting to the test various self-help books and methods, from Suze Orman on finances to Dr. Laura on marriage (not surprisingly, Niesslein's take on some of Dr. Laura's advice is hilarious). Along the way, the author goes from writing about the mundane (the disappointment of a master bedroom "littered with used dryer sheets") to the more philosophical (trying to arrange to have a "beautiful day" and concluding that such a day is "something I should keep behind glass, to be used in an emergency of bad mood.")

Finally, the book is a good conversation-starter. I think that many of us muddle through life asking ourselves the same questions that the author poses (What is happiness, do I have it, and if not, how do I get it), but that few of us ever really open up about it or are brave enough to take real action to get there. The last part of Niesslein's book suggests, to me, at least, that real happiness can come from focusing outward rather than inward. As the author notes, this doesn't necessarily involve being religious in the traditional sense or even helping others in common ways. In the author's case, it was "something extra I volunteered to do," something that made her, in her son's eyes, "noble."

The writing is impeccable; a perfect blend of readability, intensity and humor. Highly recommended!
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17 of 17 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Read it. Read it now., June 6, 2007
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This review is from: Practically Perfect in Every Way (Hardcover)
I just finished reading this book and I loved it so much it's hard to be coherent, but I'll try:

Jennifer Niesslein spent two years honestly and unironically doing her best to follow self-help advice to improve herself and her life--but without abandoning her intelligence, skepticism, or common sense. She learned a lot and shares a lot of what she learned. The verdict, at least in part: Self-help programs can often help you, but they can't change you, and sometimes they can actually hurt you. Niesslein's writing is variously (and often simultaneously) hilariously funny, thoughtful, and moving. It's just a really, really good book. You should read it.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Come along for the ride!, June 20, 2007
By 
This review is from: Practically Perfect in Every Way (Hardcover)
As a big fan of Brain, Child (Niesslein co-edits the magazine) and a voracious reader of self-help books, I couldn't wait to read this book, and I was not disappointed. I was curious to see what would happen if someone actually followed all the advice, did the goofy exercises, etc. instead of merely reading the self-help and hoping it would rub off by osmosis (which is what I tend to do.) This author actually gets with the program (or programs, as there are many,) and we get to go along for the ride. Of course, things are not so simple-- life, in all its imperfection, intervenes at every turn, yet she perseveres and comes to some interesting conclusions. The writing is funny, honest, and intimate, and makes for a great read.
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Inside This Book (learn more)
First Sentence:
ARE YOU READY FOR the porch swing ride of your life?" I ask Caleb, my five-year-old son. Read the first page
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
housing primer, signature strengths, security basket, authentic happiness
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
David Bach, Martin Seligman, Real Simple, Relationship Rescue, Andrew Weil, Planned Parenthood, Smart Couples Finish Rich, Jon Kabat-Zinn, Karen Kingston, Martha Beck, Pottery Barn, Roz Chast, Joe Dominguez, Jonathan Haidt, Jorge Cruise, Baxter Bell, Lemony Snicket, Nancy Drew, Roller Girl, Virginia Organizing Project, Wherever You Go There You Are, The Babywise, Traveling Mercies
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