Praising Boys Well: 100 Tips for Parents and Teachers [Paperback]

Elizabeth Hartley-Brewer (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: February 28, 2006

Boys need encouragement and praise to develop healthy self esteem, but they can also feel swamped and suffocated by what they see as constant commentary on their every move-and as a result they can be inclined to act out. How can parents strike the right balance between giving effective praise and not going overboard? How can we help our boys to feel proud without inspiring a false sense of confidence or making them praise dependent? Praising Boys Well shows parents and teachers alike what boys need to hear along the developmental continuum and offers countless tips on what to encourage; which phrases to use-and to avoid; when incentives are appropriate; and how to incorporate praise into our boys' everyday activities.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Elizabeth Hartley-Brewer writes extensively on parenting topics and conducts workshops about guiding and motivating children.

Product Details

• Paperback: 240 pages
• Publisher: Da Capo Press (February 28, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0738210218
• ISBN-13: 978-0738210216
• Product Dimensions: 7.9 x 5 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,121,717 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars The When and Why of Learning to Praise, February 3, 2007

By 

Anthony R. Dickinson (WashU Med School, USA) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Praising Boys Well: 100 Tips for Parents and Teachers (Paperback)

Aimed at parents and teachers concerned with children of all ages, this book certainly provides the reader with a series of useful, child-centered advice and good-practice, and may be especially welcomed by first-time parents and/or novice teachers in search of initial text/tips on this subject. Firmly grounded in a philosophy which supports the view that it is 'better to praise than to punish' in order to achieve one's desired results without harming self-esteem, Hartley-Brewer presents principles, tactics and practical tips for the effective management of children's behavior, whilst also providing cues as to the more subtle pitfalls of the overuse of praise as a reinforcer. Organized in eleven short chapters, ten sets of 10-point do's and don'ts, each address a different issue (though most are concerned with when and how to use praise effectively) -- with each briefly situated within a short text framing the relevant tips accompanying the different issues raised. Although clear in format and easy to read, it is, however, not always clear to the reviewers exactly which research findings supported the inclusion of any given introductory text, 'tips' or issue (i.e., no evidence is provided for any of the specific claims made, and there are no references/bibliography offered for further reading), but this will likely detract little from the value of this book for the general reader. As for the specific 'tips' section of each chapter, such consist in two adjacent columns marked "Parents" and "Teachers" each containing between one, or as many as six, short sentence cribs on a single page -- and, there is something here for everyone. Parents will find good, solid advice, throughout, though little really specific to the raising of boys in our view (indeed, 83 out of the 100 tips are also included in the companion volume by the same author, Praising Girls Well). In the tips column provided for teachers, one finds the provision of good, student-oriented advice, perhaps biased towards the affordance of better classroom management (which is not necessarily a bad thing!), and this is cloaked in language (and examples) relevant to the development of most sound teacher's pedagogy.

Further to the gender-specificity issue already mentioned (90% of the text also appears identical in both the 'boys' and 'girls' version of this book), I could not help feeling that the 'Praising Boys' volume was perhaps written from the point of view of helping fathers coming to a better understanding, and thus better handling of, their sons, (and likewise for 'Praising Girls' -- to help a mums' understanding/handling of their daughters), with a surprising amount of reference being made to the use (and even assisted development ?) of gender-specific stereotype activities and interests. This issue is raised by the reviewers here in cautioning the reader against expecting two very different books -- but should not be taken to detract from the usefulness of either book taken alone. Sorely missing from the text, however, was any discussion concerning the relevance of significant context variables which may arise from one's 'boy' also being a member of a multi-sibling family, or being a boy with only brothers, or brothers and/or sisters, adoption, multi-racial sibling families, single-parent families, multiple-births (twins), etc., but perhaps further volumes in this series are still being planned (?). Despite these shortcomings, this book is certainly worth reading by those coming to these issues for the first time, or for those in search of a short list of tips for managing their child-adult interactions for better all-round communications, social and cognitive development. Not a scholarly text, but this is clearly a practical volume for the casual, yet serious parent and/or teacher to 'dip-into-and-out-of' from time to time.

Dr. Tony Dickinson & Julia Hui, 2006

5.0 out of 5 stars Very simple, concise, meaningful help, November 11, 2010

By 

donalyn (Maryland) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Praising Boys Well: 100 Tips for Parents and Teachers (Paperback)

The 100 tips are each covered over a 2 page spread. They're titled, explained briefly, and then followed by suggestions for parents and suggestions for teachers. Nothing extra. Very straight-to-the-point. It makes general suggestions with specific word phrases to help you convey it right.
For example, 41 is "Keep approval simple." It then describes the difference between approval (focus on the individual) vs. appreciation (focus on the task) and why simple is best for approval while more details are necessary for appreciation.
I must say I was very pleasantly surprised by the amount of help this book offers. So if you too are struggling to relate to a younger male, (and probably the older ones, too :) ) you can't go wrong with Praising Boys Well.

5.0 out of 5 stars a great help, September 17, 2009

By 

K. Kalicki (las vegas, nv) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Praising Boys Well: 100 Tips for Parents and Teachers (Paperback)

This book is great for parents and educators. It is an easy read with many helpful hints.