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A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World

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This book is different. This book just might change things. Within the first few chapters, actually within the first few pages, I could tell that Paul Miller was describing something that I had never experienced before.

First, he honestly and precisely identifies the barriers to prayer - a short attention span, guilt, inconsistency, and weak attempts to follow a formula that would somehow make my prayers acceptable to God. Yet his winsome way of presenting these problems are not a condemnation of our failures, but are actually an encouragement not to give up.

Somewhere in the middle of the book, it begins to dawn on you that a relationship with God that is guided by prayer just might be attainable. Then Paul introduces a simple way to keep track of the many prayer stories that develop as we carry on an intimate conversation with a God who wants us to know and love him.

If you are searching for meaning, read this book. If you are jaded in your Christianity or prayers, read this book. If you want to free yourself from praying "correctly" and learn to pray honestly, read this book. If you are too busy to read anything else this Summer - read this book.

What a neat book. Who's it for? Well, anyone who wants to make prayer a bigger part of their life. Those who have trouble praying on a consistent basis, or those who want to feel more connected with God through prayer will also enjoy this book.

And how does the book accomplish these lofty goals? Well, I could break down each chapter, but in a nutshell, it suggests re-framing how you think about your relationship with God, goes on to discuss the barriers to praying, and then gives you simple tools and ways of praying that he has found help people learn to pray.

So that's the basic "framework" of the book. Woven into these subjects are various stories, many of them from the author's family, which to me, gave the book a "real-world" feel to it. When you have trouble praying consistently like I do, the last thing you want is a book giving you a long list of ideas that have no practicality in your day-to-day life. Not here, in fact I feel like the subtitle of the book summarizes this book the best - connecting with God in a distracting world.

Don't have time to pray or want a fresh look at things? Check it out, you'll probably be surprised how much more you can learn about something that you've been doing for a long time. I also liked The Prayer Project: How Each One of Us Can Make The World a Better Place to Live - In a Few Minutes a Day.

So many times I have gone to a book on prayer looking for encouragement in praying only to come away overwhelmed with all I am not doing in prayer. Miller's A Praying Life is different. This book increased my desire to pray and helped explain to me why prayer is often something I am tempted to abandon. The first part of the book gently calls the reader back to childlike trust in God, pointing to this sort of faith as the prerequisite for real relationship with God. Parts two and three explore the issues which hinder the praying life. These chapters were particularly helpful in that they showed that the reason we don't pray is not usually busyness or laziness. Instead, we do not pray because of wrong thinking about God, about our expectations of God, and about ourselves. These chapters are designed to undo some of the bad thinking in our lives which leads to a weak prayer life. Parts four and five are much more personal and practical, as Miller attempts to lead the reader to rediscover the joy of a praying life. Miller shares in these chapters particularly his own personal prayer journey and how his life and the lives of those he loves have been shaped by prayer. There are numerous practical tips in the latter chapters that are very helpful to anyone seeking to grow in prayer.

This is a rare book, for it addresses both the internal motivations of prayer and the outward practice of prayer. I don't need a pep rally, I need practicality. Yet at the same time, while I need practicality, I also need to understand the foundational reasons why prayer sometimes malfunctions in my life. Miller's book does an excellent job of addressing both of these needs.

Any time I write a review of a book dealing with prayer I feel the need to point out that bookstore shelves are already groaning under the weight of such books. There are hundreds, thousands probably, of books on prayer. A new one is going to need to be good--very good--to supplant the excellent resources already available. Paul Miller, perhaps a bit reluctantly, takes on this challenge in his new book A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World. I was drawn to this book by David Powlison's Foreword in which he gives it his highest recommendation and says, "A Praying Life will bring a living, vibrant reality to your prayers. Take it to heart." And what Christian does not want to learn to pray better? What Christian would claim that his prayers are as powerful as ever he would want them to be? The vast number of books on this subject testifies to the Christians' desire to pray more and to pray better.

A Praying Life is the fruit of the prayer seminars that Miller has led scores of times over the years. And in the structure, in what it teaches, it has the practical, real-life feel of a seminar. The meat of the book is family stories--not dramatic tales, but just small vignettes of daily life and survival. These stories do not only offer that personal touch that takes the book out of the abstract, but they also provide a measure of cohesion, tying chapter-to-chapter and part-to-part.

The book begins with a brief reflection on why Christians struggle so much with prayer. Miller says rightly, I'm sure, that many people fail to pray properly because they are pursuing prayer rather than God. Ironically, they make prayer their focus instead of focusing on the one to whom they are praying. Prayer becomes an end in itself rather than the means to relationship with God. No wonder, then, that we struggle! "Consequently, prayer is not the center of this book. Getting to know a person, God, is the center." Another source of the frustration that many people feel when they reflect on their prayer lives comes from working on this discipline in the abstract, separated from the rest of life. This is why Miller advocates a praying life, a life of prayer and not just small moments of prayer. This is something that needs to be learned over time and that needs to be nurtured. "A praying life isn't something you accomplish in a year. It is a journey of a lifetime."

Miller teaches prayer in thirty-two (!) chapters divided into five parts. In the first part, he writes about praying like a child, writing about the childlike trust and wonder that so moved Jesus and caused him to use children as an example to his disciples. Miller wants readers to learn to talk with their Father, to learn to love spending time with their Father, to learn to be helpless as children are before their father and to learn to cry "Abba" continually just as Jesus did. In Part 2 he encourages readers to "trust again," to put aside the cynicism that is endemic to our culture. This cynicism is a large part of what keeps us from enjoying God and trusting him in prayer. Part 3 is dedicated to learning how to petition God, to ask for things in prayer and to do so with confidence. He shows why we find it so hard to ask and teaches the grounds by which we can ask. He then looks at God's promises regarding daily bread and "your kingdom come" along with Jesus' extravagant promises that "whatever you ask in my name, I will do." The fourth part is about living in the Father's story, about seeing prayer as part of the grand story God is weaving into the lives of his people. The fifth and final part, "Praying in Real Life," is the most practical part of the book, teaching real-life praying through journaling, using prayer cards, and so on. This is the small bit of practical application that follows a lot of good teaching.

A Praying Life is a very quotable book that offers many excellent lines, sentences, reflections. Here is just a single example of one that caught my attention. Miller asks, "How would you love someone without prayer? I mean, what would it look like if you loved someone but couldn't pray for that person? It was a puzzle to me. I couldn't figure out what it would look like. Love without being able to pray feels depressing and frustrating, like trying to tie a knot with gloves on. I would be powerless to do the other person any real good. People are far too complicated; the world is far too evil; and my own heart is too off center to be able to love adequately without praying. I need Jesus."

From the earliest chapters to the last, the book is full of good teaching. Miller says very little that is not immediately supported by Scripture and, even in a book that is full of stories of his family, is able to keep himself out of the limelight. This is a book foremost about God--the God who asks his people to come to him and to come with him in confidence that he hears and answers prayer. He offers constant challenges to first understand prayer properly and then to pray, knowing that God desires that his people pray.

I do want to point out what I consider a weakness in the book, and it has to do with some of the people Miller quotes. Those who have read other books on prayer may well see that Miller is indebted to the mystics; he has clearly derived at least a portion of his theology and practice of prayer from them. At times there is a certainly mystical quality in what he teaches. We can begin to see the source of this in the several times he quotes Thomas Merton. Now I do know that many people quote Merton as an authority on prayer; I have not read his books on prayer so cannot comment. However, necessarily, as a Roman Catholic Trappist monk, Merton's theology will get worse the closer he gets to the cross. Hence I think an author would wish to quote him only with the utmost care. My concern with Miller's book is that he may lead people to investigate Merton and read there not only what Merton wrote on prayer but also what he wrote on other subjects. Thus there is good reason to be just a little bit cautious here. This mystical emphasis on prayer runs as an undercurrent through the book, not destroying it but at times, I feel, detracting from it.

Leave aside that concern, I still do not hesitate to recommend A Praying Life. Perhaps the greatest strength of this book is Miller's unrelenting emphasis that prayer cannot be an add-on to the Christian life; it cannot be supplemental but must always be instrumental. This book will equip you to understand prayer properly and, on that firm foundation, to commit yourself to it, with confidence that God is willing and able to hear and answer your prayers.

Praying has always been a little hard with my active mind, going in so many directions. I was pleased to learn that I wasn't the only one with this problem of being distracted. Mr. Miller has written a well thought out book that answers so many questions that I had about praying. His idea of using prayers cards, I think would be very helpful to me with the people who I pray for on a daily basis..

One thing that really make the book so wonderful was how he related his prayers to his life and family and not glossing over his weaknesses. Through prayers Mr. Miller was able to recognize that challenges always offer blessings if viewed in the correct manner.....that being to let God handle our life as a child lets it parents point them in the right direction.

I was unfamiliar with this author and would like to thank Amazon for offering it as a free eBook. Anyone who would like a fresh approach to praying would benefit from reading this book. Personally, I will be seeking more of his guidance through his books.

This is a fantastic book for those struggling with prayer. I was feeling like my prayers were ineffective, that it didn't really matter if I prayed or not, that I couldn't find the time to pray the way I thought I should among other things. Miller addresses all these hang ups and more and reminds us that Jesus came for messy, imperfect people and he doesn't expect such people to have perfect prayer lives, he just wants to hear from us. This book made prayer approachable again, it encouraged me to do what I can and allow the Spirit to grow a more committed, fulfilling prayer life out of that.

Paul Miller's A Praying Life is simply a prayer guide for the majority of the modern church, most of whom do not have a regular time of communion with God. It is not a program, a method or a theological dissertation. Instead, Miller's approach is to aimed square at the heart of the Christ follower who has shied away from prayer because he believes that it is too hard or time consuming. He speaks from the heart of a harried, burdened Christian who also stumbles and teaches the reader that prayer is not simply an appointment to be kept. It is a way of life that can become as natural as breathing.

Many in the Christian community keep themselves from prayer because they see the challenges as insurmountable. The literature on prayer is wide and deep, and depending on the books that you select, it is easy to become discouraged and turn away from the practice. Picking up Bounds, you look at your life and wonder how you would find hours per day to pray. Hybels sets out a formula (ACTS) that is perfect for some but constraining for others who attempt to steer the thoughts of their heart into the framework instead of pouring them out to God. Foster gives us 21 types of prayers, all biblical and wonderful but a challenge for the Christian to remember and apply on a daily basis. Each of the authors has enriched my life, but I find it difficult to recommend them to the majority of Christians I come in contact with.

Miller takes a different approach to the privilege of prayer. He begins our discipleship in the art of prayer by turning us back to our childhood and encouraging us to speak to our heavenly Father in the same, open, unguarded fashion we once spoke to our earthly fathers. We didn't worry about form and just told him what was on our minds. Why would God be any different? Beginning in this way we learn to crave the time with Him, worrying less about content and simply develop a comfort in the moments spent together. Without this foundation, Christians find it difficult to develop a more mature approach to prayer.

Prayer is hard, as is life as a child of God. Our Father says no, He has periods of silence that stretch for months on end and He can call us to obedience in ways that we wrestle against in resentment. It is easy for us to remember the chapters of the Bible in which prayer is immediately answered in a positive way, yet we are quick to forget the dark night in Gethsemane where the Lord cried out for His Father to take the cup from in but received a no in response. By intertwining experiences from his own life, Miller helps us to get over this hurdle that stops many Christians in their attempts to build a life of prayer. He shows that answers may not come, they may be no or that the answer may be several years separated from the supplication. The foundation that he built in the initial pages supports the broken heart of those disappointments and long winters of wait.

Whether you posses shelves of books on prayer or are seeking a new start, A Praying Life is an outstanding book to include in your library. You will read it once and be immediately moved to read it again at a slower pace, seeing and considering the parallels between your own life and that of Mr. Miller's. This is prayer guide that should become a part of many church discipleship programs.

I really like this book. It explains how to pray even has a structured system in a sense and still it doesn't. I totally believe that a journal is a great idea, I was using a journal but for my own experiences. Also what I like the most about the book is, that it's real! I mean you feel as though the author is completely open with you, that is something not all authors do, this author does a superb job in that. Should every christian read this book? Yes. The main point about the book and it is completely true, is that praying is a must. Parents can never force a child to follow Christ only prayer will do, I can not force people to believe in God, only prayer will do. It is also extremely important for people to understand that without prayer your life won't have a direction and that is a big problem in today's world. The author does not imply that we need to pray about everything, but that God will lead you, the desires will come into your heart. Start walking and God will lead you along the way, but start walking!! I quote the book "If you try to seize the day, the day will eventually break you. Seize the corner of his garment and don't let go until he blesses you. He will reshape the day".

This is an intensely personal, sometime painfully real account of Paul Millers failures and success in prayer. It is a good balance of theology and practical advice about how to live a praying life. I have read a few academic books on prayer that give good examples of what is and is not orthodox. This is not that type of book. Paul shares how the difficulties in his life have driven him to his knees in a way peace and prosperity would never have. This book has practical advice for parents, marriages, work etc. There are few aspects of life that Miller does not touch on. One of the best things I have learned from this book is that prayer is difficult. I often feel guilt that prayer is not easy. Miller explained that prayer would be easy in Eden, but the fall corrupted our ability to connect with God. I would highly recommend this book for those frustrated with prayer, and for those who need to be more real about how broken their relationship is with God. I hope to listen to this book many more times. This is a good book for someone who wants to know more about prayer, and someone who thinks they already know enough probably needs it even more. It is one of those books that draw's you to pray and worship while you are reading it.
CHRISTIAN AUDIO REVIEWER PROGRAM

This is the most honest book on prayer I've ever read. It's not pretentious, and it's not about trying to learn how to do a lofty spiritual exercise; it's about learning how to have a real relationship with God by simply talking to Him about what's really important to us. The fact that he ties it in with his child with special needs makes it more interesting and real.