Pride and Joy: A Guide to Understanding Your Child's Emotions and Solving Family Problems [Paperback]

Kenneth Barish (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 28, 2012

Pride and Joy is a different kind of parenting book.

In Pride and Joy, child psychologist Kenneth Barish brings together the best of recent advances in clinical and neuroscience research with the author's three decades of experience working with children and families. He shows how a deeper appreciation of our children's emotions offers parents a new understanding of their children's development and better solutions to the problems in their lives.

Barish offers advice to parents on how we can restore more joyfulness and pride in our relationships with our children and how we can help children bounce back from disappointment and defeat. He shows how we can repair family relationships that have been damaged by frequent anger and resentment and how we can preserve our children's idealism and their concern for others--how we can raise children who feel good about themselves and also care about the needs and feelings of others.

Barish also offers advice on how to solve problems of daily family life--establishing rules and limits, doing homework and going to sleep, winning and losing at games, our children's reluctance to talk to us, their tantrums and lack of motivation, and their addiction to television and video games. He presents down-to-earth recommendations for solving these common family problems--problems that too often erode the joyfulness of our children and our pleasure in being parents.

Pride and Joy is both informative and highly practical, and a balanced answer to the extreme methods that too often dominate parenting debates. Few parenting books address the central issues of concern to today's parents while also offering parents as much day-to-day advice.

Editorial Reviews

Review

"We all have fears as we raise our children, and we try so hard to get it right, though we're never quite certain if we are where we should be. Ken Barish, who has been there as a parent and has seen almost everything kids can get into during his years of practice, provides the information you seek and helps you get your bearings. If you are a parent, you will reach for this book like it's the hand of a dear and knowing friend reaching out to offer help. Pride and Joy is a superb book-brilliant, wise, timely, and fun to read. It is heartfelt and full of treasures every parent will store up and use." -- Edward (Ned) Hallowell, M.D., Founder of The Hallowell Center for Cognitive and Emotional Health, and author of The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness

"This is a wonderful book! This practical and very wise book will support parents and guardians thinking about how to best manage the struggles that all children-and all families-have! I wish that I had been able to read this book when I became a father."-- Jonathan Cohen, Ph.D., President, Center for Social and Emotional Education and Adjunct Professor in Psychology and Education, Teachers College, Columbia University

"Kenneth Barish, a seasoned child therapist, has written a masterful and wise book. He distills his knowledge of the field and his many years of working with children and parents into practical advice that will be enormously helpful to parents navigating the inevitably rough waters of childhood. Parents will learn how to enlist their children in solving problems and how to help their children get unstuck. Compassionate, respectful, and inspiring, this book stands out from the crowded field of parenting books. It deserves a prominent place on every parent's bookshelf."-- Ellen F. Wachtel, Ph.D., author of Treating Troubled Children and Their Families

"Stepping into the national debate over whether parents are too soft, or too worried, or too distracted to raise strong kids, Dr. Barish shares his insights into the emotional lives of children and what kids need from parents to develop resilience, optimism, the capacity for hard work, and the other good things we want for them. Dr. Barish understands that parenting can be child-centered without indulging or catering to children. By acknowledging kids' feelings, we can more effectively help them develop self-discipline. He offers an excellent guide to building the kind of warm, positive relationship with kids that is the key to setting, and enforcing, the limits that they need."-- Harold S. Koplewicz, M.D., President, Child Mind Institute

"Pride and Joy is a book overflowing with the unmistakable signs of wisdom that only decades of experience can produce. Ken Barish has written the book that every clinician dreams about being able to write and every parent (and grandparent!) dreams about being there to read. To be sure, solid advice and solutions to parenting problems are here, but even more important is the sense of perspective and equanimity with which Barish reassuringly fills each page. This is a must for every parent's bookshelf. Well done!"
-- Marshall P. Duke, Ph.D., Charles Howard Candler Professor of Psychology, Emory University and Editor of Journal of Family Life

"Understanding children requires understanding and responding wisely to the emotions that enliven--and sometimes undermine--children's everyday experience. Dr. Barish expertly weaves together the insights of developmental science, a clinician's experience, and the practical knowledge of a father to provide guidance to the challenges of parenthood. This book is wise and smart." -- Ross A. Thompson, Ph.D., Distinguished Professor, Department of Psychology, University of California-Davis

"Written in an accessible manner, Dr. Barish offers many nuggets of advice concerning the rearing of children in this confusing, complex society. He emphasizes the need to support children's emotional health through sharing their joys, offering solace when they are sad or disappointed, and by addressing any conflicts that may occur between parent and child. Research is cited throughout the book, but in language that is lucid and free of jargon. Dr. Barish cites many examples that deal with children's problems drawn from his clinical practice, adding to the richness of this book."-- Dr. Dorothy G. Singer, Department of Psychology, Yale University

"If you only buy one parenting book in the next ten years, do yourself (and your children) a favor and make it Pride and Joy: A Guide to Understanding Your Child's Emotions and Solving Family Problems by Dr. Kenneth Barish... Pride and Joy will certainly help parents repair and enrich relationships with their children while helping them establish the rules and limits children really do crave. Best Parenting Book of 2012." -- Gina Stepp, examiner.com

"Parents who wish to focus more on the positive, who want ideas of how to deal with
behavioral difficulties, and who would like to raise children who are optimistic and
confident would greatly benefit from this easy-to-read, easy-to-put-into-practice book." -- Michelle Stroffolino Schmidt, PsycCRITIQUES

About the Author

Kenneth Barish is Clinical Associate Professor of Psychology at Weill Medical College, Cornell University. He is also on the faculty of the Westchester Center for the Study of Psychoanalysis and Psychotherapy and the William Alanson White Institute Child and Adolescent Psychotherapy Training Program.

Product Details

• Paperback: 280 pages
• Publisher: Oxford University Press, USA (May 28, 2012)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0199896240
• ISBN-13: 978-0199896240
• Product Dimensions: 5.6 x 0.6 x 8.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (19 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #131,273 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Kenneth Barish, Ph.D., is Clinical Associate Professor of Psychology at Weill Medical College, Cornell University. He is also on the faculty of the Westchester Center for the Study of Psychoanalysis and Psychotherapy and the William Alanson White Institute Child and Adolescent Psychotherapy Training Program.

Dr. Barish was raised in Mt. Vernon, NY and now lives in Mamaroneck, NY, where he and his wife raised their two children. He graduated from Yale University in 1972 and earned his Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology form the New School for Social Research in 1980. In addition to his teaching, writing, and clinical practice, Dr. Barish plays jazz trumpet, and his jazz group performs often for professional events.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Practical supereb advice on parenting and grandparenting April 29, 2012

By Papa Don

Format:Paperback

Dr. Barish has written one of the best, most helpful, practical and least gimicky books I have ever read about parenting. I found the book eminently readable and interesting but for a lay book very scholarly. The insights are profound and I wish I had this book available when my children were first born. It has helped me to better understand and interact with my children as well as to relate to the children I encounter in my business. A profound experience for parents, grandparents and anyone who encounters children.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Therapist's Thoughts July 2, 2012

By Dr EL

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

A clear, gentle, terrific book -it puts the pleasure back into parenting while considering what really helps kids. Finally there is a book I can recommend when parents ask what they should read!

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars illuminating and practical advice June 7, 2012

By appreciative parent

Format:Paperback

Dr. Barish's book provides well-reasoned and practical advice on a range of issues that all parents experience with their children. Based on both scientific research and Dr. Barish's own experiences from years as a clinical psychologist and parent, the book explains basic concepts, applies them to particular parenting challenges, provides specific examples and case studies, and offers concrete advice. Useful for parents with children of all ages.