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Prime: Adventures and Advice on Sex, Love, and the Sensual Years [Hardcover]

Pepper Schwartz
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (34 customer reviews)

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Book Description

June 26, 2007

"Sex can be just gorgeous—and sometimes it is the most beautiful thing that can happen between a man and a woman. But don't you also think that it can be just practical? Like when you're hungry and don't want a three-course meal with wine, music, and ambience; you just want a sandwich. You don't love the sandwich. You don't hate the sandwich. You just want to eat the sandwich and feel satisfied."

Dr. Pepper Schwartz has always encouraged women to embrace their sexual appetites. After three decades of answering people's questions about their emotional, sexual, and romantic lives; after writing several books on sex and relationships; after thirty-five years as a sociology professor at the University of Washington, she has formed firm opinions about sex and relationships. However, when her own situation changes, when she becomes a single woman after twenty-three years of marriage, she has to reevaluate and discover how sex and dating can work for her at this unique time in her life.

Masters and Johnson, the famous sex researchers concluded that you can have sex, and want sex, way into old age, if you never stop doing it. And Pepper is very sure that she never wants to stop doing it. Now, she must make the effort to put herself in the running—getting in shape physically, emotionally, and spiritually—and figure out ways to meet worthy and available men. Ideally, she would like to have a serious relationship, but if that isn't in the cards, she still wants sex and companionship. And while she may feel as sexually alive as she did when she was twenty-five, the number and availability of men has changed.

So, how do you look for a life partner after fifty and enjoy sexual adventures along the way?

Prime is Dr. Pepper's response to this question. It's her story of exploration—sex, adventure, and romance—spread out like a road map for women of every age, because even as she is telling her own tale, she doesn't forget to exercise her talent for advice. Whether you're looking to wake up a tired sex life, start a new relationship, explore cyber-dating, indulge in a four-hand massage, flirt with gigolos on vacation, or commit to the love of your life, you can find tempting tips and genuinely helpful guidance.

The prime of life has lengthened and as Dr. Pepper's experiences show, it would be wrong not to live every moment to the fullest. Calling for a brave and creative reevaluation of what is possible in the second half of women's lives, Prime invites every woman to relish her sexuality, take risks, and go after what she really wants—whether it's a sandwich or something substantially more satisfying. . . .


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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Starred Review. Schwartz, a sociologist at the University of Washington and sex and relationship adviser (The Great Sex Weekend) starts off with a question she had to ask herself: what should a woman do when she's suddenly single again after 23 years of marriage, hoping for another long-term relationship, or at least sex and companionship? I feel as sexually alive as I did when I was 25, but the number and availability of men for me has changed, Schwartz writes. Her candid and sexy memoir, targeted toward women in their 40s, 50s and 60s, is both a highly entertaining sexual autobiography and an account of her romantic liaisons in the five years after her divorce. The book is an unusual and appealing mixture of realistic dating tips and shrewd relationship advice interspersed with cautionary tales of Schwartz's rocky relationships with a succession of alpha males Despite the continuing thud of her romantic disappointments, Schwartz doesn't regret the risks she took. Ultimately, she learns to savor the pleasure of just being alive in her own body. For someone who admits that she can let her hormones create fake intimacy in her relationships, it's nice to see Schwartz finally enjoying an authentic relationship with herself. (June)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

“[Dr. Pepper’s] engaging writing style makes the book a page-turner.” (Library Journal )

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 272 pages
  • Publisher: William Morrow; 1 edition (June 26, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0061173584
  • ISBN-13: 978-0061173585
  • Product Dimensions: 0.9 x 6.3 x 9.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 15.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (34 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #440,069 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

This book is a great read with lots of humor and good information. L. Oxenhandler  |  9 reviewers made a similar statement
I loved Pepper's stories and she really encouraged me to me more open sexually. M. Winn  |  6 reviewers made a similar statement
Just finished the book today. Mystic Diva  |  5 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
21 of 23 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Hurrah for Pepper June 26, 2007
Format:Hardcover
Prime is a good read with accurate information and advice woven into it. The concept of "two handed massage" and a get-away to Bali reads like friendly advice over coffee, but in reality it is also sound couples counseling. The theoretically advice is cloaked in wonderful erotic adventures that can be a guide book for any women who wants to continue to be sexually responsive.

When I turned 60 everyone was saying it was all over. Pepper has confirmed my belief that a fulfilling sex life is not just for the young of age, but the young of heart as well. For women, love and sex go together like pie and ice cream. Pepper tells us that ice cream can be great all by itself .
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17 of 18 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Thank God We're Not Young Any More July 26, 2007
Format:Hardcover
If you were (safely) married when the sexual revolution began and went back into the dating world as a divorced woman in the years that followed, you know how difficult it was to ignore all those messages from the Fifties about how 'nice girls don't." Most of us who are single in this stage of our lives did anyway, and still do, but in case any of those messages are still holding you back, a few pages of this terrific book will convince you not to waste any more time before you make the most of the opportunities for sexual adventure and sensual gratification that are all around you. And while you don't have to go to Bali (although who wouldn't?) to get what's yes, still coming to you, it's lucky for us that Pepper Schwartz did. There will be critics caviling that what the lady really wanted was love, not sex, but as the onlooker in the classic scene in "When Harry Meant Sally" said of Meg Ryan's restaurant orgasm, "I'll have what she's having."
Brava, Dr. Pepper!
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Not Just for Women in their Prime! July 30, 2007
By Dr. Z.
Format:Hardcover
As soon as my wife finished reading her copy of Prime, with that luscious cover, I grabbed it and starting reading. What a remarkable book!! What a remarkable woman! Dr. Pepper Schwartz, a highly regarded academic sexologist takes off her professorial robes (literally) and shares her most intimate experiences, discoveries, and evolving wisdom as a single woman exploring sex and love in what she comes to view as the prime of her life. This is a great read,not just for single women in their "prime," but for men and women of any age.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars If you are 50ish and newly single, this is the book for you
As a gynecologist I am expert at giving advice on safe sex, contraception and the hormonal challenges that often sabotage midlife sexual health. Read more
Published 8 months ago by A Gynecologist
3.0 out of 5 stars Prime by Pepper Schwartz
Prime caught my attention, because it is written by well known sociologist Pepper Schwartz. Pepper Schwartz states, that men for millenium have been having casual sex and now it... Read more
Published on March 14, 2011 by Sandra
4.0 out of 5 stars Courageous; another very helpful Baby Boomer woman
A courageous book. Dr. Schwartz really lays it all out there.

My only reservation: I was troubled at the way her marriage dissolved and the explanation: because she and... Read more
Published on August 3, 2010 by Learning New Ways
4.0 out of 5 stars Insightful book
This is a funny and heartfelt book. The author openly talks about her sexuality which is extensive. Read more
Published on July 24, 2010 by S. Minto
5.0 out of 5 stars Prime: Adventures and Advice on Sex, Love and the Sensual Years
I read the book from cover to cover without stopping and then went back and re-read chapters of particular interest. I gained a lot of insight. Read more
Published on July 13, 2010 by Sexyatsixty
2.0 out of 5 stars Too much Dr. Pepper gives me gas
Dr. Schwarz seems like a nice woman who, it must be admitted, has brought a lot of pleasure to many men. MANY, many men. Read more
Published on November 23, 2009 by Kerry Smith
5.0 out of 5 stars Prime life
Just finished the book today. It's a great story of Pepper's growth but more than that, I think it is a help for those women over 50 that may need permission to let go and enjoy... Read more
Published on September 6, 2008 by Mystic Diva
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book in helping us stay grounded in our approach
Dr. Pepper's book candidly looks at dating at mid-life. Her anecdotes provide personal insight, and allow us to live, experience and learn through her. Read more
Published on July 12, 2008 by Hedaz Nyair
2.0 out of 5 stars More like Pepper's little black book than helpful advice
I was disappointed because more than an empowering book for women in their prime, it was a little black book of her conquests. I couldn't even finish it. Read more
Published on May 21, 2008 by TV
5.0 out of 5 stars "The Creepy Professor"
Okay, it was a wonderful book. Interesting and absorbing, but because the author is a "Sex Researcher" the book a tad creepy. It's like if Jeffery Dahmer wrote a cookbook. Read more
Published on December 11, 2007 by R. Gambel
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