Customer Reviews

The Principles of Seduction: How to Get Another Person to Fall in Love With You

5 star:		(8)
4 star:		(4)
3 star:		(4)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

This book may be dry reading for some, and perhaps annoying to proof-readers. If you can get past these hurdles, The Principles of Seduction is probably the most comprehensive, factual, and rational explanation for that crazy little thing called love.

Mr. Viddler relies mostly on existing research for this book, but like many true discoverers, pulls all the essential ingredients together to create something truly wonderful.

To some, love seems to come naturally. Others get lucky. Then, there are the rest of us, who can't settle for less than the real thing, and yet the real thing always seems to be out of our grasp.

Have you ever seen happy couples and wonder, "Why not me?" This book is for you, especially if you're the sort that longs for fulfillment, but can't trust it all to fate.

Mr. Viddler spends a fair amount of time explaining the basics, both of personality types and the fundamental elements of love. The title is misleading, since he does not write to the lethario (or letharia). It's powerful stuff, but like my good friend once said, "Use your powers only for good."

If your friends have ever told you, "You think too much," when discussing love (or more precicely, the lack of it), then this book is for you. I've gone from being very lonely to being very choosey, and for this I extend Mr. Viddler my most profound thanks. DF

A sober, well-written and well thought out set of instructions by someone whose knowledge of the singles market is clearly secondhand.

Nice psychology. Some wonderful truths. Yes, G. Clayton, being a good man wanting to fall in love means I have a wonderful gift for someone. And there are others that are wonderfully affirming. But here's the rub.

You say that women would consider the most romantic place to meet a man to be the New York subway system. That women would welcome a potential love-of-their-life in the grocery store, bookstores, art galleries, whatever. Makes good sense, and I bet lots of women would agree or even volunteer these things.

But to paraphrase Mammy in a certain 1939 movie, what women want and what they say they want is two different things. In my recent 2 1/2 year-long being single experience, top-quality women are as receptive to meeting men for romance in daily life as your publisher would have been to receive the manuscript for this book written in crayon on construction paper. These women go to bars - regardless of their socioeconomic status. They log on to chat rooms. They meet men through friends. They go to singles events (though that's rare for attractive women with good careers under 45). They occasionally let someone in when their guard gets taken down by stressful events, such as those who marry the security guard who helped them when their car was stolen. And in life as it is, rather than life as some think it should be, that's about it.

Makes sense, too. If you were a successful, attractive and smart early-30's woman, would you want to go through life looking at everyone, in romantically-available mode, all the time? You would get 20-50 men EVERY DAY hitting you up - you couldn't do anything else. And as for my wonderful gift, about which I sincerely agree with you, if the woman has the epidemic disease of fear and hostility toward intimacy, it will end up ungiven.

With all of that said, the book is heartening and useful. A good and worthwhile read.

...and use someone who knows how to edit...it is by far one of the worst books ever written in terms of communicating ideas...it is not written in English...on the flip side your message is potentially extraordinary and is so powerful that it could change people's lifes in significant ways...I am one of those who was never successful in getting the woman I love to love me...I have recently started applying the principles..do not know yet if the principles would work..but have a feeling that it is working...but what I have seen while reading the book (guess trying to read the book is better description...gosh...what a horrible language and editing..) I saw all the things I have been doing wrong...and related to it...again PLEASE RE-WRITE THE BOOK then it will have a chance of becoming a masterpiece...short sentences please...no unnecessary words..plain English..please..

This book is the best book I have ever read on the subject of seduction. If you are a thinking person, you will appreciate the sensitivity with which G. Clayton Viddler addresses this delicate subject. To recognize that people desire not only to be appreciated for who they are but also for who they want to become is a major contribution to this type of "how to" literature. It illustrates how in the process of seducing someone, you can also affirm the very things that are closest to their heart and validate their personality in the process. This becomes a win-win situation for both parties.

You may not agree with everything this author advocates, as his ethical perspective is decidedly Hindu, but from a purely pragmatic point of view his analysis of the romantic process is very astute. I found this book to be eloquent, compelling, and useful in my personal life and I would recommend it to anyone who wants to dig a little deeper into the process of seducing someone. "Principles of Seduction" is a useful book both for it's practical wisdom and for it's theoretical analysis of the human personality. Five Stars.

This author talks about human behavior as though he is conducting a study with white, lab rats, and babbles on like a kid who needs to make his essay 2,500 words long for a grade. For instance, in the chapter titled "Approaching Men", Viddler takes up 11 grueling pages to explain that in order to attract an emotionally available man, all that a woman has to do is to stand in a man's proximity, stare, look away, stare again, and run her fingers through her hair. He didn't need to spend 11 pages to explain this. In addition, Viddler tries to point out that no matter what you look like, you can still get that certain "someone" to become attracted to you and to fall passionately in love with you forever. This book could have been scaled way, way down, and it could have been explained in plain english, instead of like a college thesis.

The author claims that psychological research has identified three crucial elements of a person's identity that go into feeling love: gender identity, social self-image, and self-ideal (p.16). If true (and I have no reason to doubt it), this lays the foundations for a way to approach getting someone to fall in love with you. So far, the book is interesting. Unfortunately, after this revelation, it falls flat. The sections on how to create the three feelings in the love interest are weak. For example, the part on gender identity focuses only on the first instant of meeting. Supposedly you can reinforce a person's gender identity through a few basic techniques within 5 minutes of meeting someone. Personally, I find this dubious, and I would require a lot more evidence to convince me that it is true.

This book might be usefully compared to Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People," which is, in my opinion, an excellent book from which I have profited enormously. By comparison, Carnegie is much less systematic in his approach and bases his conclusions much less on social scientific research. To that extent, I would give the advantage to Viddler. However, where Carnegie excels is in the crucial area of providing enormous numbers of enlightening, real-world examples that help the reader to understand the points he is making. Viddler, by contrast, provides about 3 examples in his whole book. That may sound like hyperbole, but it really is not. The book consists almost entirely of theory. Not only are there very few examples, there aren't even many practical suggestions. Saying tht you need to emphasize an extrovert's individuality is a start, but you need many specific suggestions in order to know exactly what this entails. Viddler provides one. He also litters the book with quotations, it is true, but they are almost all quotations from theorists, often classical thinkers. There's nothing wrong with classical thinkers, but you're not likely to learn much about seducing the lady at your exercise club from reading Goethe.

Frankly, I was very disappointed with this book. Anything with a title this bold is bound to induce a certain amount of scepticism, but enough other reviews on this site encouraged me to hope for something more. I'm afraid that my first, sceptical feelings were correct with this work.

This book is nicely written in an academic way. If you are writing a romance novel in which one of the principle characters is a colleage professor who starts muttering incoherent psycho-babble just when he is supposed to get romantic, then this book will be an invaluable source. Intelectual and charming is how I would discribe this book. But not practical.

If you want some down and dirty know-how on the nuts-and-bolts of seduction, read books by Don Steele and Ron Louis. These two are the best.

I bought this book expecting to receive a text dealing with communication skills and perhaps behavioral psychology. Much of this book, however, is based on existentialist philosophy (Nietzche's "romance" ideas didn't work on Mathilde Trampedach or Elisabeth, so they probably won't work for you). You will find little practical advice from this book subtitled as a "How to." Try Leil Lowdnes instead.

Sorry, this book is horrible. The negative reviews are right on. The positive reviews seem to be highly bogus.....

(1) The book is horribly written, hard to follow, repetitive, repetitive, repetitive,

(2) the book is NOT based on research or empirical evidence, but on the author's (it doesn't even seem like he has a bachelor's degree) "theories", like there are only two kinds of people, liberal and conservative-- learn what someone is, and presto-- they will fall in love with you.

(3) This book will simply not help you. There are no secrets here, no cool ideas, no insight.

(4) You will be sad if you by this book--- you will know immediately when you open it that you have wasted your money, AND, if you do read it--- i actually did--- you will feel horrible--- it is a boring, tedious, WASTE OF TIME!

(5) if you do buy the book, and i'm not 100% dead-on-right, email me, and i will publically repent.

Excellent book on seductive principles, sensible psychology. I have read the information and it works just as a college major of study. If you want to seduce more than just the average date, read the book. It is a very complex book that lends beyond love potions. Confirming the other's gender identity is very much psychology, sociology is not the book. It goes beyond how to be your favorite movie star who likely seduced you. If you want to be on top read the top seduction book. Then you may seduce movie stars, instead of being seduced by people who write about them.
Seducing introverts and extroverts requires more study than in the book, but it is a good start if you are serious about being a master of seduction, learning about the self-ideal is a good concept. Equally important the book warns you of seducing the wrong person for you.