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Proving Manhood: Reflections on Men and Sexism (Men and Masculinity)
 
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Proving Manhood: Reflections on Men and Sexism (Men and Masculinity) [Paperback]

Timothy Beneke (Author)
5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)


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Book Description

0520212665 978-0520212664 October 28, 1997 1
Is male chauvinism a natural byproduct of American masculinity, or does it reflect a deeper pain and fear at the heart of gender relations? With sensitivity and honesty, Timothy Beneke, author of Men on Rape, frames the issue of sexism as a problem of masculinity, one deeply rooted in cultural ideals of manhood and forever opposed to the feminine. Men are required to "prove" their masculinity daily from childhood on. They are forced to endure situations of stress and distress that demonstrate their strength and unflappable endurance. In rituals such as sports, sex, and work, men constantly invent and renew their masculine identities as they learn to repress and reject all "feminized" behavior. Pornography, homophobia, and the morning sports section become crucial "proving grounds" where masculinity is tested and asserted.
Beneke argues that men demonstrate the attitudes that underlie sexism in the psychically related practices of reading the sports page and pornographic magazines. In both, men can test their manhood vicariously. Following the lives and careers of athletes religiously in the sports pages, men celebrate and identify with the physical endurance and strength that is at the core of the masculine ideal from the safety of their living rooms. Gazing at languishing nudes in Playboy, men similarly identify with an ideal of masculine prowess and superiority safe from any threatening manifestations of female sexuality. Beneke negotiates the minefield of sexual politics with intelligence and skill. He draws extensively on his experience as an anti-rape activist to understand the roots of male aggression. With personal anecdotes of hero-worship and guilt over his own struggle with latent sexism, Beneke incorporates a thought-provoking self critique into this unique study of modern masculinity.

Editorial Reviews

From Library Journal

Beneke, an antirape activist, here sets out to explore the sources of sexism in American society. His general ideas build on the feminist neo-Freudian notions of Dorothy Dinnerstein and Nancy Chodorow. Boys, he posits, enjoy an early period of infantile identification with their mothers, from which they are forced by society's need for them to become men. The urge to return to this pre-Oedipal Eden, however, remains a strongly tempting but potent fear. Men need to denigrate women because they fear their power. While none of this is new, Beneke's discussion of pornography as arising from the adolescent's shame at being aroused inconveniently by glimpses of the women around him, and gay male sexism as resentment of women as objects of desire for most men, are useful additions to the discussion. Unfortunately, Beneke is overly apologetic and rather annoying at times. He is probably right in identifying his audience as primarily feminist women, but a more factual tone might win a wider audience. For women's studies collections.?Mary Ann Hughes, Neill P.L., Pullman, Wash.
Copyright 1997 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Kirkus Reviews

Freelance writer and antirape activist Beneke (Men on Rape, 1982) here traces male chauvinism to anxiety and identity crisis, but the occasional insight is hard-sought in his vague sociological outlines. Drawing on the work of psychoanalytic feminists, such as Nancy Chodorow, and others, the author explores what he identifies as the disabling pains men take to prove their manhood--pains that will never be relieved, he argues, without their confronting sexism. Throughout, Beneke's superficial analysis is confounding as he wanders from point to point in his eagerness to simplify a complex and challenging landscape of ideas. Turning the tables on women, he says that the suppression of ``objectifying'' mediums such as pornography and other variant forms of sexuality that denigrate women (``whore sexism'' and ``Madonna sexism,'' which respectively reduce women to sexual objects and deny their sexuality altogether) represents a sexual threat to masculinity. Beneke writes from a personal angle in chapters entitled ``Reflections of an Antirape Activist'' and ``Reflections on Mothers, Grief, and Sexism,'' a mishmash of undeveloped journal jottings in which he seems to invite readers to consider how his reaction to the early death, when he was 13, of his mother might fit his own theorizing. This personal material, however, is completely out of place in Beneke's sociological study. He looks at the sports page as a realm of masculine identification, concluding that the hollowness of male glory, as in sports, keeps men from intimacy with women and with themselves--a sweeping generalization. Is manhood something to be proved, consciously or unconsciously? Though the paradigm may fit the author's self-conception and his prior research into the subset of men who are violent against women, this book sheds little light on manhood for the vast majority of males. -- Copyright ©1997, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 183 pages
  • Publisher: University of California Press; 1 edition (October 28, 1997)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0520212665
  • ISBN-13: 978-0520212664
  • Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.5 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.6 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,226,075 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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5.0 out of 5 stars deep and brillaint, August 5, 2011
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This review is from: Proving Manhood: Reflections on Men and Sexism (Men and Masculinity) (Paperback)
I am extremely surprised that I am the first reviewer of a book this excellent, a book which was copyrighted in 1997. It was not an easy read, so perhaps that is the reason. I have recently been reading books in an effort to understand sexism. Some were tracts, some mocked the tracts (thereby becoming a form of tract themselves) and a few seemed to answer my questions but were too abstract to give me the deeper understanding I sought. This book -- Proving Manhood by Timothy Beneke -- has given me the understanding I sought. I cannot say I enjoyed it -- I did not -- but it was profound and deep. Allan Johnson wrote "The Gender Knot -- Unraveling Our Patriarchial Legacy." This was the book that made the most sense before I read Beneke. Johnson says that Patriarchy hurts men as well -- that the system itself is oppressive. Beneke made it possible for me to viscerally understand that trauma to men and (as Beneke frequently says) the even greater trauma to women.

In the Introduction Beneke writes:

"In chapter 2, 'Proving Manhood,' I look at compulsive masculinity: the compulsion to create and conquer stress and distress as a way of proving manhood and asserting mens' superiority to women. I argue that pain--stress and distress of any kind--is problematic for men in ways that threaten manhood and lead to sexism. ... One way that boys and men cope with this is to take flight into male glory, which can be a substitute for infantile safety."

Beneke's closing statement is:

"I am aware of the danger in these discussions of speaking of men as oppressed by gender, but it is clear that gender injures men and diminishes their humanity. I am not saying that women oppress men but that the whole system of gender does and, in particular, that men oppress men as men. Men, taken as a whole, do not treat women very well, but they do not treat each other very well either."

These quotes do not convey the essence of the book, but perhaps they convey some of the flavor.

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