Customer Reviews

The Pursuit of Love: The Meaning in Life (Volume 2)

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Maybe it was my fault . . . I read this book for some answers: about what love was, how it functioned, what it meant in our world. Singer's main thesis seems to be that love is a 'search for meaning' but this theory is never really elucidated - why do we need to search for meaning? How does love function to provide 'meaning'? Why 'love' as our major meaningful activity, rather than - sport? reading? collecting coins? Singer never seems to explain these things. Singer spends considerable time exploring possibilities, and examining competing theories for a particular facet of the experience of love. All too often, these enquiries conclude with, 'Oh well, it's all a grand mystery' or 'That's what makes us human after all.' Grrr! Having noted what made me cross and bothered when reading this book, I must say that Singer did have some interesting observations. I liked his idea that there was no such thing as 'love at first sight.' He explains that the person we fall for this way is one final choice in a series of hundreds of thousands of choices in our lives which simply make the person 'appear' to be instantly 'the one.' He also talks about why 'love' as a pursuit today is increasingly unfashionable, and his discussion of this did make me think. This book is not without value, but there is a lot of 'waffle' and aimlessness in it, some copping out of the tough questions, some failure to fully explain ideas, and a few old-fashioned values and comments. Mildly interesting, but not at all comprehensive.

A dialectic of philosophers', psychologists', and imaginative writers' opinions about love and sexuality, Singer's book accomplishes a philosopher's aim -- examine the logic (faults and benefits) of Freud, Sartre, St Augustine, Bergson, and Spinoza among others, on the subject, reaching the author's distinct opinion. The scope includes country, family, self, and humanity (102, 113); appraisal and bestowal; empathy, sympathy, and compassion (111); changing love (45); libido, eroticism, and imagination; religion's association with power, knowledge, and goodness (119); and autonomy underlaying happiness.