Put Your Best Foot Forward: Make a Great Impression by Taking Control of How Others See You [Hardcover]

Mark Mazzarella (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: February 22, 2000

People are always judging you. Whether you are in a meeting, on a date, in a classroom, or on the telephone, others are constantly forming impressions of you -- often drawing conclusions from traits you never knew you had or didn't know influenced others. When you understand how impressions are made and how to accentuate those positive qualities that appeal to others -- and eliminate the negative ones -- you will have mastered a powerful interpersonal tool and learned how to "Put Your Best Foot Forward."

Written by Jo-Ellan Dimitrius, America's best-known jury consultant, and Mark Mazzarella, a seasoned trial lawyer and lecturer, "Put Your Best Foot Forward" is an insightful guide to help you enhance your mental, emotional, and physical attributes by understanding the true impact of how you look, what you say, and how you act. Filled with perceptive insights and shrewd advice and based on extensive research and experience, it is a primer on what Dimitrius and Mazzarella call "impression management."

In "Put Your Best Foot Forward," you'll learn how to project what the authors call the "four Compass Qualities" that are the foundation of every great impression:

Trustworthiness Caring Humility Capability

You will also learn how to paint a positive picture of yourself with the "Seven Colors," or key areas, of impression formation: Appearance Body language Voice Communication techniques Content of communication Action Environment

Drawing from their own experiences as well as data collected from thousands of participants in their own and others' research and surveys, Dimitrius and Mazzarella describe how each quality and color affects what people think of you and howyou can affect others' impressions of you by modifying these traits. They have pinpointed "magic pills," which can always be used to create great impressions, and "toxic traits," which irreparably damage your good name. Drawing examples from the bedroom, personal relationships, even cyberspace, Dimitrius and Mazzarella explain that you can improve the impressions you make -- anytime, anyplace.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

First impressions are always difficult to shake. So why not help influence how others view you in the first place, thereby affecting the way they think of you in the long run? Put Your Best Foot Forward, by Jo-Ellan Dimitrius (who specializes in the meaning of appearance and behavior) and Mark Mazzarella (a trial lawyer), fully lays out a step-by-step program they call Impression Management, designed to do just that. Based on extensive individual interviews, literature reviews, and survey analyses, it begins by examining exactly how and why people make these initial assessments. It then explores the specific "qualities others find most important, and how each of the ways you paint a picture of your personality and values--appearance, body language, voice, communication style, the content of your speech, your actions, and environment--can be honed to project the best possible impression of who you are and how you are likely to think and act." Wisely, the authors never suggest compromising your integrity or surrendering your individuality. They instead recommend crucial but simple behavior such as choosing dark clothing to command authority, increasing "soft but sustained" eye contact, and avoiding "highbrow vocabulary and snobbish words." --Howard Rothman

From Publishers Weekly

Dimitrius, a jury selection consultant in such high profile cases as those of Rodney King and O.J. Simpson, and a familiar guest on the talk show circuit along with her trial lawyer colleague Mazzarella (both coauthors of Reading People), present a self-help book intended to teach readers to "manage" the impression they create through attention to appearance, body language, speech and their personal space. Despite the topic's commercial potential and the utility of some of their findings (they interviewed thousands of people and reviewed the scientific and popular literature), the writing is deadly earnest, dull and often dated. Dimitrius and Mazzarella urge readers to display trustworthiness, caring, humility and capability in order to make a good impression, though their advice is undercut by their often preachy tone. In addition, the discussion of how to cultivate these "compass qualities" implies a certain degree of calculation. Steps to making a successful impression include studying one's behavior on videotape, thorough preparation for each encounter and eliminating traits the authors deem toxic, such as offensive physical acts, insensitive communication and pettiness. Citing research on the impact of physical attractiveness, they offer guidelines for personal grooming and creating a wardrobe that owe more to old-fashioned "Dress for Success" rules than to casual contemporary style (recommendations for professional attire include dark blue suits for men and women). These polished people-readers would do well to add humor and practicality to their portfolio of desirable traits. (Feb.)
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 320 pages
• Publisher: Scribner (February 22, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0684864061
• ISBN-13: 978-0684864068
• Product Dimensions: 9.3 x 6.2 x 1.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds
• Average Customer Review: 3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #174,288 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

26 of 27 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent overview, March 24, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Put Your Best Foot Forward: Make a Great Impression by Taking Control of How Others See You (Hardcover)

This book is far better than the author's prior work, Reading People, which seemed to suffer from a persistent lack of definitive statements. This book offers real insights on how other people will be likely to view you and has considerable real work and experience behind it. It compares favorably with two other interesting books on my bookshelf: Influence, by Cialdini and How to Succeed with Women, by Louis and Copeland. Though the Louis and Copeland book is the best of its genre, it would benefit greatly from Ms. Dimitrius' sections on how to be perceived as trustworthy and caring in Chap 12.

My experience has repeatedly confirmed several of Ms. Dimitrius' points. Most notable is her observation that "Most people's favorite topic of conversation is themselves, their interests, or their opinions. Great impressions are assured when you tap into, and satisfy, others' love of themselves" (p. 236). I work with a number of very successful people who have very crowded schedules; they always make time when you are genuinely interested in learning the details of their favorite topics and greatest successes. They're so happy to see your interest that it's very hard to keep them from picking up the tab for lunch or dinner.

15 of 16 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars Take your personality in for a check-up, September 22, 2000

By 

"ewp2000" - See all my reviews

This review is from: Put Your Best Foot Forward: Make a Great Impression by Taking Control of How Others See You (Hardcover)

Reading this book is like taking your personality in to the doctor for a physical. You may feel uncomfortably poked, prodded and palpated, but you will perhaps be the better for it. More precisely, you will be able to get along better with others after reading this book. Some of the pointers for making a good impression are very specific to high-powered business encounters. It's also important to keep in mind that the authors are basing the advice in the book on their experience prepping people to make a good impression on trial juries -- a scenario that may or may not apply to your particular set of relationships. Regardless, the level of detail given on personal interactions such as handshakes is fascinating.

Some of the tips provide great insights into human psychology, especially regarding the emotional impact of things like body language, speech pacing, and voice quality. But some of the tips seem manipulative, like car-salesman talk, and others are just plain common sense -- like good grooming and making eye contact. The emphasis on all aspects of personal appearance is depressingly shallow. I felt as if I were receiving a lecture on the importance of wearing makeup, uncomfortable clothes and painful shoes. One annoying contradiction is this: despite the advice to be yourself, lest you come across as artificial, the book still advises you to change any so-called "toxic traits," or else. The strategies given to minimize or mitigate your less savory attributes (rather than a hopeless attempt to _eliminate_ them) is far more encouraging. All in all, a rather effective reminder that people will forget what you say, they'll even forget what you do, but they'll never forget how you made them feel.

12 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Very Helpful-Insightful, March 20, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Put Your Best Foot Forward: Make a Great Impression by Taking Control of How Others See You (Hardcover)

This is a wonderful book. I didn't realize how many things people look at, or pay attention to but now that I have read the book I am more aware of how I put myself into a surrounding. It made me see a few things I was guilty of doing and I am now trying to keep that in mind. Often I will start to do something and I remember what I read in this book. Thank you for bringing to mind the different areas people look at upon a first impression. Jo-Ellan Dimitrius and Mark Mazzarella are great authors. I would recommend this book highly to anyone..