Customer Reviews

The Pyrates

5 star:		(16)
4 star:		(11)
3 star:		(0)
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1 star:		(0)

 

 

Author George MacDonald Fraser, the accomplished British author of the FLASHMAN PAPERS and the Private McAuslan trilogy, has also toiled as a Hollywood scriptwriter. And he's been fascinated by pirate stories all his life. Thus, in THE PYRATES, the reader is treated to what could serve as the script for the funniest, most outrageous buccaneer saga ever not put on film.

The hero of THE PYRATES is Captain Ben Avery, RN, the handsomest, most chivalrous, noblest, most incorruptible, bravest, most dutiful, and most unseducible man ever to wield an officer's sword on behalf of His Majesty. In Avery, as with every other of the novel's characters, Fraser has lovingly created a caricature. In any case, the time is "the old and golden days of England". King Charles occupies the throne. Ben is ordered to secretly convey a priceless crown to the King of Madagascar. On the same outbound ship are Admiral Lord Rooke and his gorgeous daughter Vanity. Of course, seafaring rascals capture the vessel, steal the crown, abandon Ben on a sandspit, and sell Vanity into white slavery. The tabloids (!) blame Avery for the debacle, and the remainder of the book has our superhero valiantly struggling to rescue honor, crown and Vanity from assorted scoundrels and near things. Of course, even the villains are occasionally endearing, especially if they're British, e.g. Colonel Blood, RA (Cashiered), a darker version of Avery without the ethics or meticulous dress code. And, needless to say, Captain Ben is besotted with Vanity, though his appreciation for her considerable charms is entirely platonic, anything more prurient unbecoming an officer and a gentleman.

Since a small movie plays in my mind whenever I read fiction, the chief delight of this swashbuckling caper is the way Fraser attaches period-piece incongruities to the plot which result in hilarious "sight gags" and other absurdities. Contemplate the following: laundry chutes in a Spanish galleon, meal-seating announcements aboard a pirate ship, buccaneers getting drunk and rowdy on captured Perrier, eau de cologne by the barrel or the handy bucket size, a pirate chief's stock portfolio, the deplorable lack of Kleenex in a fetid orlop prison, shipboard ruffians being entertained by a puppet show, pirate disability insurance, the limited number of headsets for men set adrift in small boats, threats of a horrible death by bicycle pump (?), or the French buccaneers' battle cry of "Remember Dien Bien Phu!" Imagine what Mel Brooks could do with this material!

THE PYRATES is about fifty pages too long. Those parts of the non-stop action that include the South American Indian tribe and the insanely evil Spanish Viceroy, Don Lardo, were unnecessary digressions better left on the cutting room floor. However, that minor flaw didn't prevent me from laughing out loud on several occasions, causing my wife to throw alarmed glances my way. Yes, I think even the Queen would be amused.

"The Pyrates" is the first book I read by the wonderful George Fraser, and it's a great place to start. A pretty unique achievement, the book blends every bit of pirate lore, atmosphere and outright clichés into a marvelously funny and entertaining read.

The plot is rather difficult to explain; it follows the dashing Captain Avery as he attempts to recover a priceless treasure, sometimes helped and sometimes hindered by the roguish Colonel Blood, falling in love with Lady Vanity (who describes herself as "gorgeous, proud, and insufferably spoiled"), fighting pirates, winning battles, getting stranded, imprisoned, rescued, rescuing and virtually every other thing that has ever happened in a pirate story (including, of course "The Black Spot").

It's all such huge fun, and Fraser's writing is so delightful, you can't go wrong. An absolute must for fans of swashbucklers (literary or cinematic). Be sure to stick around for the "Afterthought", where Fraser discusses the real life figures he placed in his story. The bit about the real Colonel Blood is by itself worth the price of the book. Recommended.

GRADE: B+

(If you like this book, PLEASE check out Fraser's lesser known "The General Danced at Dawn". It's even better.)

Imagine the fantasy and imagination of The Princess Bride; take the joie de vivre of Pirates Of The Caribbean; mix it a little with the eccentricity of Carry On Don't Lose Your Head (leaving out the tackier parts of the humour) and then take each of your favourite pirate stereotypes (bad guys, good guys, black spots, needlessly evil Spaniards, sword fights and derring-do) and turn it into one of the most joyous and hilarious books you'll ever read. Oh, and some of the characters really existed, too, just to add a slight historical edge.

The Pyrates is perhaps the funniest book you'll read all year, perhaps it's the funniest book you'll read in many years. For a long, long time I thought it was the funniest book I was ever going to read.

One gets the clear impression while reading this book that GM Fraser, the author, has thrown caution to the wind. Normally his books are considered, paced and quite recognisably scholarly, for all their adventure and humour. With Pyrates, however, we get a writer having the most fun he's had in years, and sharing it with his readers.

Reviews can be used for many purposes; the purpose of a review may be to critique a novel from a particular standpoint, or it may be to throw interesting light on it by placing it in a broad context. The possibilities are almost endless. In this case, I'm going to nail my colours to the crow's nest:

I'm writing this review simply to tell you how much I loved this book, pass on some of the happiness it gave me, and thoroughly recommend that you get a copy of it as soon as you can. I hope it makes you laugh out loud as often, and as heartily, as I did!

This book is a dream to read, especially when you get to the end and find the authors notes on the basis of the characters (one is Captain Hook as played by Basil Rathbone, etc.). 'Appy Dan Pew alone is worth the price of admission on his ship Le Grenouille Frenetique (The Frantic Frog). There are duels, fair maidens (of many types), every version of pirate imaginable, and musicians diving for Korngold music. If you enjoy a good pirate yarn and want a good laugh, I can think of no better book. Yes, there is a short-coming here and there (the end is more of a second-rate fade out than an actual conclusion), but this is less important than the parts that are SO right. Read and laugh -- if you can't laugh at this, may you be keelhauled twice!

You've seen them countless times before, the dashing heros and evil villains in those classic pirate movies. But you've never seen them as they are in George MacDonald Fraser's labor of love, The Pyrates. Fraser, author of the Flashman books of historical fiction, wrote The Pyrates as his personal tribute to the many pleasurable hours he spent with Daniel Defoe and Robert Louis Stevenson, Basil Rathbone and Errol Flynn. Giving a nod to both Hollywood and history, Fraser has crafted a wickedly funny version of the English navy's run-in with the Coast Brethren.

With tongue firmly in cheek, Fraser launches his Hero, Captain Ben Avery, on a mission that quickly goes astray. Forced to team up with the Anti-hero, Colonel Thomas Blood (British Army, cashiered), Ben must recover rare jewels o' price, rescue the Heroine, Lady Vanity, from the fell clutches o' evil pyrates, and rid the Spanish Main o' every tarry-handed mother's son in the Brotherhood. For spice, Fraser throws in a fascinating array of knaves, kings, despots, wayward admirals, Lost Indian Tribes, kidnapped damsels, thieves, sultry piratical temptresses, and shifty pawnbrokers.

The Pyrates is a splendid read, a great story told by a great storyteller, and I'm past due for a new copy. But this book also shows Fraser's immense skill as a writer. He breathes life into every character, no matter how minor the role, and he writes with a precision and economy that leaves me amazed.

So clap yer deadlights on The Pyrates, wi' a wannion, and blame y'rself if you leave emptyhanded, for this be a right fine read, by the Powers, devil a doubt, or scupper me wi' a marlinspike...else.

I am a huge fan of Fraser's "Flashman" series, and have enjoyed "Mr. American" and "Black Ajax" as well. "Pyrates" only enhanced my appreciation for this author. It is one of the few books I have ever read that actually made me laugh out loud. It is hilarious from start to finish, especially the side comments from the pirate "greek chorus" at different spots throughout the book. You don't have to be a fan of swashbucklers to like this story. You just need to enjoy well-written, well-crafted, and unbelievably witty writing. Thank you, Mr. Fraser...you are a master of your craft. I know you wrote this book while working on screenplays for Hollywood -- any chance THIS story will ever become a movie? We can only hope!

This one is the real deal! A swashbuckling pirate yarn full of action straight from a Hollywood script meeting, characters out of central casting, and a sense of humor that never stops. In fact, that's the only negative for the whole book - it never stops. I was ready for this one to be done long before Fraser was, but hey, he was having fun so why should he stop just for me?

"The Pyrates" follows our near perfect hero ("near" perfect because he doesn't realize how annoying perfection can be, so that's a flaw) as he first tries to protect a priceless treasure, then recover it from the infamous pirates who've taken it along with the near-perfect girl that he has fallen in love with. There's also Colonel Blood, a ne'er do well and a cad who nevertheless is on the side of good (most of the time, whether he wants to be or not) to provide the grit for the story.And hilarious anachronism's (Sheba's boots by Gucci. for instance) and a cast of despicable pirates, plus the loathsome villain Don Lardo.

For reades who like their buckle swashed, their heroes stalwart, their bad-guys really bad and their humor setting turned on high, this is the one.

Here's the totally absurd and unpredictable (at times) adventures of one Captain Benjamin Avery told by the master story teller and screenwriter, George MacDonald Fraser.

Fraser plunges the reader "head first" into a bizarre Hollywood cliche pirate adventure that keeps the reader hanging onto each chapter as if to harken back to the days of the serial cinema cliffhangers.

The language of the story is a blend of 17th century English / "Pirateese" with a dash of modern inventiveness (where else would one encounter a female buccaneer who wears Gucci boots?).

Complex plot twists combined with truly amazing and memorable characters will lead the reader into a fun world of swashbucklers the likes of which haven't been seen since the great Errol Flynn / Raphael Sabatini pirate flicks. Sprinkle in some Monty Pythonesque humor, and a dash of nuttiness and you'll have fun.

Takes some time to get into (especially the pirate language), and be forewarned, the ending leaves the reader somewhat disappointed. Otherwise, a fun and total "walk the plank" experience. Take it on vacation with you to a deserted Caribbean island beach and let your imagination run free.

Now that I've read all of the Flashman series, I went searching for something else written by George MacDonald Fraser. I came upon a book that he wrote some time ago entitled "Pyrates" (yes, that's the way he spells it).

This book is a hilarious spoof on all the pirate movies of the late 1930s...Errol Flynn, John Barrymore, et al. Our heroes are handsome down to their chins, our heroines are "real" blondes, at least according to Fraser (taking after Mickey Spillane's "I, The Jury"). Our villains are so evil that one even keeps losing his dentures.

But, as always, Fraser's writing has me guffawing as he (writing from the vantage of the 1980s) portrays things happening in the 1600s in current terms; ie, castaway sailors in the Indian Ocean were arrested by the Burmese Coast Guard and found guilty by a Burmese court for "fishing without a license".

This is one heck of a read.

This has long been one of my favorite books. I've read it over and over so that I need to replace the copy that is falling apart. One does need to be familiar with the old pirate movies of the 1940s and 1950s to appreciate some of the jokes, but it is definitely in a class with the sort of antics that occur in Disney's Captain Jack Sparrow movies. Plus it has the added bonus of telling you what is real history and what is pure fancy on Fraser's part. My favorite character is the anti-hero, Col. Blood, who really did exist, no doubt with the same personality traits that Fraser has given him. I not only am ready to replace my copy but prepared to buy others as holiday gifts for the Captain Jack fanciers on my list.