Customer Reviews

HOW TO GET WHAT YOU REALLY WANT, A UNIQUE, STEP-BY-STEP PLAN TO PINPOINT YOUR GOALS AND MAKE YOUR DREAMS COM TRUE

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Over the years, I've read many a book on goal-setting and achievement. I started many years ago with the obligatory `Think and Grow Rich', avoided Anthony Robbin's `Unlimited Power' because it looked `too American', floundered around some more in the Positive Mental Attitude books, and came back to Anthony Robbins in desperation. I was seeking something practical and effective, to help me manage my life, as I was having problems due to giving up a well-paid job to study full-time. At that point, I was hooked on NLP. However, if I had read Wishcraft, I might have bypassed Anthony Robbins altogether, and would not be where I am today (such at it is :-) ) Why? Because this book provides everything I was looking for in a book at that time.

It is split into two broad sections: the first helps you to answer the question "What are my goals?"; the second, "How do I achieve them?". The first section contains a number of fairly standard exercises to help you brainstorm your goals. If you are new to the idea of goal-setting, this is a great place to start; however, if you have done many exercises in goal-setting, then most of these exercises will be familiar. However, I suspect that most people will find something of use here, no matter how well- read they are.

The second section is where the book comes into its own. The authors outline a number of tools and methods to help you be successful once you know what your goals are. Some of them are to do with planning, some to do with emotions and managing your state, some are to do with getting the help of others.

The planning model is the best I've come across, and I've done some formal training on planning in a corporate environment. It doesn't cover complex ideas like GANT charts, critical-path analysis, and so on, but it does provide a simple, workable, and effective method of setting out what you'll actually need to do to reach your goal. And it all boils down to two simple questions .....

Can I do this tomorrow? If not, what do I need to do first?

Keep going through those two questions, and you'll end up with a plan consisting of achievable steps that you can do in a day, rather than huge steps which take days or weeks to accomplish. One of the difficulties that many people experience with tasks of this size is due to lack of specificity; breaking the task down into smaller ones helps to make it more `real' and hence easier to get started on and to acccomplish.

However, in any planning model, particularly where you are venturing out into uncharted territory, there will be some points in your plan where you simply do not know what steps are required - if you are familiar with the idea of unconscious incompetence, then you'll know what I mean. (If not, take a quick look at the article below). Again, using one simple idea, the authors can help you to overcome those problems, based on the idea that if you can't do something, then you know someone who can, or you know someone who knows someone who can, or you know someone who knows someone who...

They call the idea `barnraising', from the idea in certain communities where each person helps the others build their barn, and then receive help from each person in building their own barn. They suggest getting all your friends, family, and colleagues together; tell them EXPLICITLY what you want; and see how they can help. At the same time, help them with their goals or plans. Whilst not a new idea, the authors go out of their way to tell you that you don't have to do everything by yourself, and then give you a framework in which to work with others to achieve your mutual goals. Anyone familiar with Stephen Covey's Seven Habits will immediately recognize the win/win situation.

Where this ties in nicely with NLP is the `explicit' part: the meta-model is the ideal tool here for: A) defining what you need B) clarifying exactly what help others can provide C) helping others define what they need.

The authors also provide two questions that will help if you encounter a problem in the form of `I can't do/have X until I have/do Y' The two questions are:

How can I get X without having/doing Y? How can I get/do Y?

Later, the book covers some basic time management skills, and some general strategies for dealing with fear, including one called `Lower Your Standards - at First'. The latter goes against many positive thinking-type books by saying if your goals are too far beyond your current beliefs about what you can do, you will most likely be afraid. The way to reduce your fear is to aim to do things badly, then there is no problem if you do actually do them badly. Then, when you've got some experience under your belt, you will be in a position to set realistic, challenging, and achievable goals.

The comments I've written here sound fairly mundane - I'm not one to rant and rave over a book. One of the biggest complements that I can give a book is to say that I will never throw it away, and I will read it at least once per year without fail. I've had this book for about 4 years now, and I've read it 5-6 times, and I will never throw it away (at least, I might, but only to replace it with a less dog-eared copy). Its simplicity, elegance, and plain- talking, combined with sold, practical advice, make it one of my favourite books.

As with other reviews I've read, I wish to commend WishCraft for its practical and effective approach to strategy planning and development.

I first read WishCraft in 1990. I was homeless and emotionally destitute, in the worst part of my mid-life crisis, and clutching at straws to find ways to rebuild my life. A friend whose couch I was sleeping on suggested I give it a read, and I did.

I have since rebuilt my life. I have the wife of my dreams, a home overlooking Victoria Harbor in Hong Kong and a brand-new, bright and shining son, all of which I treasure.

This is two "five year plans" down the road, and I still use the book's tools as an outline for planning and shaping my life. It is not the only tool I use, but it is invaluable. It provides a reference for me to determine and adjust my life's goals.

Like any such book, I don't believe you should marry it. It is not a bible. Rather, it is a guidebook, and especially suited for those of us who have not had any training is creating life strategies.

I truly love this little book. I was originally introduced to it years ago when I was not sure I wanted to stay in mental health, and a mentor suggested I check it out. I found the exercises a blast and very original. My favorite: the one in which Sher suggests you play a spy in your own house or apartment, taking notes on what "the occupant" wears, how they decorate, etc.,in order to find out more about them. These tasks were just as good at increasing my own self awareness as finding career direction. They also reminded me of things I loved or wanted that I hadn't had the chance to do or missed doing....such as living in the town I wanted, getting a particular degree, community theatre, and musical performance.

Interestingly, I remained in mental health, but with a higher degree, working in a different area, and with changes in other things in my life that were important to me. The book was a big factor, though not the only one, in that choice. I'm still glad I made it.

One very practical suggestion in the book is, if you can't have all of what you want right away, get as much of what you want as you can. If you can't afford a trip to Paris yet, put a picture of the Eiffel tower up in the living room and play Edith Piaf music and keep saving. In my case, I wanted to move to a town 100 miles away; so I started spending weekends there, or even taking day trips to shop there or attend seminars at the university.

Sher includes a fairly elaborate time management system. It consists of flow charts,to-do lists, a bulletin board, and pictures of sort of a cheerleading family she encourages you to formulate from characters you admire and believe would understand and be supportive of you (this can be anyone, dead or alive...Einstein & Paul McCartney adorned my board! Hokey, I know, but I found it helpful).

And this is my one complaint. Barbara never upgraded. I kept on hoping to see an edition which incorporated Outlook or Palm Pilot or something like that, or even its own software, but that hasn't happened. She does have a webpage, but the only thing of interest there is a message board in which members share their experiences and she announces appearances. Since I now organize online, it's hard when I want a "review" of some of these exercises...or even when I want to go back to my original plans....to get excited about tacking up paper on a bulletin board.

Nevertheless, I do go back and do the odd exercise now & again, not because I'm dissatisfied with my life, but because there are other plans that have popped up, such as new hobbies and relationships. I also have had to purchase a new copy once in a while because I'm frequently giving mine away to younger relatives or clients.

I would recommend the book...not to stake your life on, but as an amusing & user friendly means of self-discovery, and a way to either confirm your life choices, or to help you get the gumption to put on the brakes if you need to.

I came to Amazon to buy yet another Wishcraft to give to someone who is wondering, "What next?" While here, I read a skeptical review asking, "What happened to these people twenty years later?"

I can't tell you about the people in the book, but I can tell you what happened to one person who read it more than twenty years ago. I was a Kansas housewife and mother when I read Wishcraft. While working through the first half of the book, I decided I wanted to be a negotiator or mediator. The book makes no mention of any such thing; I knew no one who did this. The book's exercises gave me tools to imagine. Sher's strategic question, "Can I do this tomorrow?" led me to decide that the first step was to go to the library to find a book about negotiation. I can still feel the knot in my stomach as I pulled that book half-way out from a top shelf -- then pushed it back, thinking, "Who do I think I am? I can't do this!" Then pulling it all the way out, thinking, "I've been checking books out of the library all my life, I CAN do THIS!" With strategic tools and encouragement from Wishcraft, I found training, an internship, and supervision from some of the best in the field, and went on to head a state-wide farmer/creditor debt-restructuring mediation agency. As life went on, my goals have continued to grow, and the tools I learned from this book continue to help me achieve them. It helps that I eventually studied negotiation at Harvard and earned an MPA from the Kennedy School -- but I never would have even applied if this book hadn't give me the tools to imagine and to go after what I really want. Sometimes things imagined appear without work. I don't credit the book with those gifts; I credit the book with helping me recognize and savor them.
Recently a career coach and her client sat down next to me on a bench in Boston Common. After listening to her list career book recommendations, I couldn't help interrupting to ask what she thought of Wishcraft. Her tone was matter-of-fact: "Oh, it's still the best."

I bought Wishcraft 17 years ago after finding myself divorced and living alone in a studio apartment overlooking a Safeway parking lot. I worked in factories as a temp and drove a beat-up Renault--not much better than Lt. Columbo's. I was down, disgusted and needed to do something real with my life. Maybe even go for my life's dream. . .

Ever since college I had a crazy dream about one day living in France. I'd fallen in love with the people and the country during my junior year abroad in 1979. But as the years rolled on, "real life" took over and the dream faded into the background. I kept up my French as best I could with books, movies and music, but that was about it.

When my divorce hit, I was free to go anywhere, but I was broke and demoralized. I don't remember where I got a copy of Wishcraft, but I did and immediately devoured it. Did all the exercises and studied the book as if my life depended on it--I believe it did.

To make a long story short, I'd planned to be permanently living and working in France in 5 years, at the time. Even on paper, it seemed crazy. But I shut up my inner critic and got down to working with Wishcraft. I started making tiny, baby steps of progress. Then worked some more. More progress. It wasn't always fun or easy, but I kept inching forward. And I did eventually reach my goal, but not in the 5 years I'd planned. I made it 3 ! It wasn't because I was super multi-tasking genius person, either. I ain't. I think there's a snowball effect from taking small steps and actions, especially the way Wishcraft teaches. I stumbled across resources, opportunities and contacts I could have hardly imagined when I first opened the book. I've been living my dream life for 14 years now, and it's getting better all the time.

To say I highly recommend this book is an understatement. You might as well ask me if I recommend breathing. This book is that important if you want more out of life. I've read many, many self-help books, but Wishcraft is the only one that gave me the practical tools to not only help me get what I wanted, but show me that it was actually possible.

<B>I've used <I>Wishcraft</I> to totally change my life. This book spoke to me like no other. It is like a <I>What Color is Your Parachute</I> for people (like me) who don't want a corporate job.
For 13 years I worked as a secretary while my talents went unused. Now at age 44 I've returned to school to study video production, and a video I wrote and directed is going to be shown on IFILM.com and probably elsewhere. I am living proof that it possible to make changes in your life, live your dreams, and do things you never thought possible. After some 20 years in print,<I>Wishcraft</I> is the still the best tool I know of to start your journey. <FONT COLOR="RED">CAUTION: You must do the exercises in the book to derive any benefit. I did every exercise, many more than once.</FONT> Much success to you.

Most books on life planning have, to my mind, two fatal flaws: they assume that your "strengths" are an infallible guide to what you "should" be doing with your life; and they then attempt to map this to a "career." Barbara Sher starts with the basics: what is most important to YOU? Given that, how are you to get it? (And this doesn't necessarily translate into "career"!) Sher also takes the planning process beyond self-analysis and shows you, in clear and practical terms, how to get the help you need to achieve what you want. Her subsequent books are all worth reading, but start with this one; it's a breath of fresh air amongst the hundreds of "Find the Right Career For You" look-alike guides!

In 1992 a counselor recommended this book for me when I was seeking advice on changing careers. I thought "Yeah, sure. Like a "self help" book could really be helpful, and sheesh, with a name like "Wishcraft"... Must be a bunch of hooey."

Well, it actually is helpful. Get it, read it, do the exercises in it. It can help you change your life. When I look at the changes I've made over the past 9 years due to what I learned from working through this book I'm astonished. I'm actually conscious of "Wishcraft" related approaches to my life almost weekly, even after 9 years. I really should read it again now.

I've recommended it to dozens of people, and just came here to buy a copy for my husband (he can't have mine!). I didn't know Barbara Sher had other books out - so I just bought them, too - let's see what else she has to offer!

If you are considering buying this book, do it. And buy a spare to loan to friends.

I read this book when I was struggling with my job, but didn't know for sure what to do next. This was the first book I read that really helped me to break out of my limited way of thinking about my career. The first half of the book encourages you to suspend reality for a while, just like watching a great movie! You can dream as big as you like and get real excited about the possibilities of a life beyond the one you are in. Then the second half brings you gently back down to reality, but provides you with real tools for capturing the essence of your dream and finding a way to start moving toward it. For me, I've always dreamed of "making a difference" in the world. But I spent my time helping companies market their websites. This book helped me to see that if I could find some companies that are "making a difference" and help them with my interactive marketing skills, then I too would be "making a difference"!

I can't thank Barbara Sher enough for this book. It is made for procrastinators like me who know we're made for greater things, but can't for the life of us figure out what. It is split into two parts. The first section puts you back in touch with your childhood genius (we were ALL geniuses) and helps you figure out what you love and what you want. The second section shows you exactly how to get it. It's simple, brilliant, and if I can do it, anyone can. I read this book two years ago (after putting it off for 4, of course) and have realised my dream of being a cartoon voice! Buy it, but more importantly, don't put off reading it.