Radical Honesty: How to Transform Your Life by Telling the Truth [Paperback]

Brad Blanton (Author), Marilyn Ferguson (Preface)

Book Description

Publication Date: March 29, 2005

The first edition of Radical Honesty became a nationwide best seller in 1995 because it was not a kinder, gentler self-help book. It was a shocker! In it, Dr. Brad Blanton, a psychotherapist and expert on stress management, explored the myths, superstitions and lies by which we all live. And this newly revised edition is even worse! Blanton shows us how stress comes not from the environment, but from the self-built jail of the mind. What keeps us in our self-built jails is lying.

"We all lie like hell," Dr. Blanton says. "It wears us out...it is the major source of all human stress. It kills us." Not telling our friends, lovers, spouses, or bosses about what we do, feel, or think keeps us locked in that mind jail. The way out is to get good at telling the truth, and Dr. Blanton provides the tools we can use to escape from that jail of the mind. This book is the cake with the file in it.

In Radical Honesty, Dr. Blanton coaches us on how to have lives that work, how to have relationships that are alive and passionate, and how to create intimacy where none exists. As we have been taught by the philosophical and spiritual sources of our culture for thousands of years, from Plato to Nietzsche, from the Bible to Emerson, the truth shall set you free.

Product Details

• Paperback: 286 pages
• Publisher: Sparrowhawk Publications; Revised edition (March 29, 2005)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0970693842
• ISBN-13: 978-0970693846
• Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.1 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 14.9 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (72 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #20,338 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #76 in Books > Politics & Social Sciences > Philosophy > Ethics & Morality

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Gestalt therapist Blanton believes that lying is the major cause of human stress and advocates strict truthfulness as the key to achieving intimacy and calm.
Copyright 1996 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

From the Publisher

"Outrageously entertaining and wonderfully wise....apply it liberally throughout your life." --Gay Hendricks, Ph.D., co-author of Conscious Loving

"Dr. Blanton advocates a take-no-prisoners approach to honesty that would send Miss Manners shrieking from the room." --Elizabeth Hickey, The Washington Times

--This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 286 pages
• Publisher: Sparrowhawk Publications; Revised edition (March 29, 2005)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0970693842
• ISBN-13: 978-0970693846
• Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.1 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 14.9 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (72 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #20,338 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #76 in Books > Politics & Social Sciences > Philosophy > Ethics & Morality

More About the Author

From the title page of my upcoming autobiography...

Some New Kind of Trailer Trash: Starting Some New Trail of Kinder Trash)

This is the story of Brad Blanton, a not so lone ranger from the quaint, antique American south, who turned out to be a rough cut but compassionate kind of Bubba Buddha. It's about how a poor kid from the hills of Virginia overcame abuse, ignorance and poverty to become a renowned psychotherapist, fervent activist, best selling author, pretty good father, bad guitar player and poor politician--and how he was, for most of his blessed God damned life, frequently, cheerfully alive and happy and in love and simultaneously extremely pissed off at a lot of ignorant greedy people for a lot of horrible and stupid things they did to millions upon millions of other people.

He lived his life as a dung beetle in the shit pile known as the United States of America during the time (almost his entire lifetime) its corporate capitalists took the lead in destroying the world without him ever killing a God damned one of them. So as it turned out, though he thought he had been brave, he was a coward after all and just as full of shit as everyone else of all classes that lived in that ignorant, powerful and poisonous place in the world where he grew up. He wants this epithet for his epitaph:
"I am glad for what I did with my life except that I sincerely think I could have saved a hell of a lot more of humankind and of the earth if I had killed more God damned stupid rich people."

for a more extensive bio go to www.radicalhonesty.com

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

189 of 197 people found the following review helpful

3.0 out of 5 stars interesting, extreme philosophy November 21, 2004

By Timothy H. Mansfield

Format:Paperback

This book is brash, confident, strong, results-oriented, opinionated, simple, and straightforward to the point of over-simplifying. It also has New Age-y sub-themes that will put off some, but that's another matter.

The book's basic point is sound -- honesty is the best policy. However, the implementation of that policy, as described in "Radical Honesty", is not very nuanced. It is a shock program most properly applied to people who are consciously or unconsciously living out self-destructive scripts that they internalized from somewhere or another, for people who are being deeply, fundamentally dishonest with themselves and with others. It is for people who could use a real shaking up, to break free from the false security and real stress of a false persona.

That's fine as far as it goes. However, if you were to apply the principles of radical honesty indiscriminately in your daily life, you would be a jerk, basically, and you wouldn't be able to get anything done in society. It's best considered for bringing health to broken intimate relationships among adults.

On this point, a quote from Khalil Gibran comes to mind:

"If indeed you must be candid, be candid beautifully."

The stark candidness prescribed in "Radical Honesty" is not beautiful, it is raw and ultimately self-centered. It's for emergency use, like approaching the task of redecorating by burning your house down and starting over.

That said, personally I found the author's brash style to be refreshing and likeable. As always, the reader should just extract the personally valuable stuff out of his collection of techniques and his overall message, and simply ignore the rest....

For a much less strident romp around the topic of how to have healthy adult relationships, check out "Life and How to Survive It" by John Cleese and Robin Skynner. It's a very thoughtful and engaging read. Don't be thrown off by afterimages of Cleese's Monty Python silliness -- he has a wonderfully incisive mind and does a fine job as co-author of this work on the practical psychology of healthy living. Read more ›

114 of 124 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Radical honesty for those who believe in "Grow Up" February 11, 2002

By Beth DeRoos HALL OF FAMETOP 1000 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Paperback

Whenever I pick this book up off the bookshelf I am reminded of the Jack Nicholsons character in A Few Good Men where he says "The Truth? You cant handle the truth!". This is an in your face book that will make some people terribly uncomfortable. People who are afraid of honesty. I believe that while many people will say they want the truth that when they hear it they are livid. Truth hurts. And I admit that I have a double standard with myself when it comes to truth. Most of the time I speak my mind and say what I believe. But I also admit that I also deflect questions from some people whom experience has shown me cannot handle the truth, simply because I don't need the nonsense in my life.

And I admit that I winced when I first saw the books title and then became intrigued when I heard him speak on a variety of radio and television shows. So I bought the book and am glad. And yes it is heavily politically incorrect in an era where pushing and enabling the whole woe is me victim mode is so popular.

One of my favorite parts of this book and advise that I believe more people need to take is where the author writes on page 179" Many of the people who go to therapists or physicians seeking relief are tired. They are tired from having worked out their lives in such a way that they get worn out instead of recharged by living. When someone like this takes responsibility for exercise, nutrition, and rest, a number of their "psychological" problems disappear. The human body has a wonderful capacity to restore itself it is given a break from abuse and a chance to rest. Wellness is a natural state of being for people who have learned how to get out of their own way.... "

On page 185 the author notes wisely that "What happens when therapy works and keeps on working is that people want to learn about how to stay well. They become interested in living in the world by constantly renewing their leases on life rather than by being lost in their minds. They can do that best within the context of a sustaining community of other people in the same boat--people who have created wellness and are committed to maintaining wellness."

On page 187 he shares that most people don't take care of themselves out of knowing they should. That there was a man who was told by his physician to lose 15 lbs but didn't and in fact gained 10 more pounds and was told at his next doctors visit by the doctor "If you aren't willing to take care of yourself, why in the hell should I?". That it took having a heart attack that could have been prevented for the man to change. Dr Blanton then wisely notes that "learning to take care of ourselves creatively rather than resentfully is a big step in growing up".

On page 212 Dr Blanton notes "Responsibility means that whatever you are doing, you are willing to experience yourself as the cause. You are the source of your troubles as well as your successes." "As long as you are blaming, explaining, apologizing, trying, resolving to be good, hoping or feeling guilty, you are not being responsible." On page 215 "To get back in touch with who you are when you have been lost in your mind is to get back to your source. This is hard to do. You have to die to live." Read more ›

76 of 83 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome - changed my life! August 14, 1999

By Lara Johnstone

Format:Paperback

I used to think I was honest, until I read this book and realized that I had been nothing but a moralizing self-righteous bull*%$# artist and I was the cause of my anger, loneliness and seperation from others. It was not so much that I lied to those I loved, but that I had been lying to myself, I was hating everyone for not being who I thought they 'should' be... Well, what an experience it has been starting to listen to my body, share my anger, resentments and appreciations, to notice my victimization neurosis, and learning to share my feelings in the moment... Since I read the book and started practicing Radical Honesty, I have learnt how to live a life of laughter, loving, and joy... Pain, jeolousy, anger, etc. are no longer to be avoided, but to be 'experienced' as opportunities for growth, to work through them, to 'experience' them and move on.... Not only have I come to love myself, I love those around me for 'who' they are, and not for 'whom I want them to be'! Do yourself a favor and buy this book now, and then practice it! You'll never be the same.. ;-) I have not only bought it for my friends, but also my old enemies, some of whom have now become people I admire and appreciate.

28 of 29 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars An Access to Freedom June 13, 2000

By Matthew Foraker

Format:Paperback

Radical Honesty is a courageous piece of work that dares to tap into conversations many refuse to acknowledge, namely, the extent to which we as human beings have a level of dishonesty that permeates our lives, a level of dishonesty developed over years that is so automatic, so second nature, that we have forgotten anything else is possible.

Blanton is intentionally blunt and abrasive. The message is not to be mixed with sugar. In fact, "sugar" is part of what is being distinguished.

A trap in engaging this material is to interpret it as suggesting one should vocalize every thought or opinion without regard for its impact on others. That's just irresponsible, and it misses the message.

Blanton points out how as human beings we are not naturally set up to be truthful. Instead, we say and do what we think will produce the desired result and have us succeed. That we attempt to manipulate each other (or at least please and impress each other) is not profound. That we don't realize the depth, breadth, and overall impact of this is more interesting. That we've grown to believe our "act" will be more successful in life than our true thoughts and feelings is profound indeed.

Blanton is pointing to something that is possible, being utterly straight and authentic in life, and to a freedom and power that is on the other side of the "act." Perhaps utter truthfulness with others is an access to truthfulness with oneself, something we prefer to think we already have.

Read Blanton's book, and you'll think again....

Two films come to mind that occur to me as at least providing a taste of the authentic conversations that are possible and what they can open up for people, the classic "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof" and the more recent "The Breakfast Club." People started speaking straight. Lives were altered, and a certain freedom became available. What is that freedom?

Radical Honesty is a fresh introduction to powerful ideas about what it is to be human and the notion that as humans we naturally inherit ways of thinking and being that limit us and bind us. Something else is possible. Read the book, and you may discover that the entire human race has issues you thought were yours alone. Read more ›