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Raising Adopted Children, Revised Edition: Practical Reassuring Advice for Every Adoptive Parent Paperback – July 10, 1998
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Adoption practices have evolved considerably since this book's first publication in 1986, and the new version of the "Dr. Spock for adoptive parents" reflects the latest theories. Drawing on the findings and practices of pediatricians, social workers, scientists, and adoptive parents, Raising Adopted Children is carefully and thoroughly researched. Chapters on open adoption, international adoption, and transracial adoption are combined with advice on bonding and attachment, breast-feeding an adoptive infant (possible but complicated), dealing with schools, privacy issues, adopting a child with disabilities, adopting as a single parent, and the challenges of adolescence. While Melina's many years of professional and personal experience shape her advice, she remains very evenhanded. For example, she's a strong proponent of the "early telling" theory of adoption (being open about the adoption with the child from the beginning), but she also clearly presents other points of view, and, throughout the book, encourages parents to make decisions that feel right for them.
The text includes specific suggestions for explaining a child's birth circumstances, including common misconceptions, and a valuable discussion about whether adoptees are at greater risk for behavior problems or learning disabilities. She also provides suggestions for setting rules for contact with biological parents, easing grief, and acknowledging a child's history. A completely annotated list of selected references and resources rounds out this superior guide. --Ericka Lutz
From Library Journal
Copyright 1986 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
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Top Customer Reviews
More importantly, the back of the book is full of resources and references that you can use for follow-up information.
The only thing that kept this from being 5 stars is that it takes a lot of effort to read the whole thing. Many of the ideas are reinforced over and over again, which is good, but can really sap the reader.
Great job overall though.
I also found the writing to be hyperbolic, as in "You MUST" do this, or, my favorite "All adoptive parents" fear that their children will love their birthparents more than the adoptive parents. Use of such imperatives, "All," "must," "will," instead of more realistic words like "Many," "should/need," and "might," makes the text sound like a user's manual for computer applications.
That negative said, the book itself does contain a lot of useful information, which I haven't seen in any of my previous adoption-related readings. I would absolutely recommend it to people who are going through the adoption process. I think there are better books for people who are wondering whether or not to adopt (such as "Is Adoption for You?"), but that this book directly addresses the fears and questions for people who are about to become adoptive parents.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
This gave a lot of insight into the moods of Adopted children (my grandchildren). Very helpful for me to have patience during many temper tantrums. Read morePublished 5 months ago by Peggy's Posts
I am in the process of adopting a child and this book was required for the home study. It is well organized and has useful information. Read morePublished 14 months ago by Bes
There are some good parts of this book, and it discusses a wide range of adoption issues, but I often do not share the opinions of the author. Read morePublished 17 months ago by L S S
This book is packed with information. It is a great resource for newly adoptive parents! I would highly recommend this book. Read morePublished 19 months ago by Suzie Tremel
This was one of the books on the recommended reading list for my adoption. I found it dated; it did not go into much detail about open adoptions. I also found it discouraging. Read morePublished on January 30, 2014 by Amazon Customer
I really enjoyed reading this book and learning all about the issues that may come up as an adoptive family.Published on January 3, 2014 by Patricia Vogt
The book began by describing some of the fears that adoptive parents feel. It felt like Melina was in my head, expressing my own thoughts, and I felt so grateful to know that I... Read morePublished on April 17, 2013 by Rizzo
Does not have a good flow and is a bit choppy. I just could not get into this book. Next....Published on December 14, 2012 by Amazon Customer
This book has many valuable points, but also has many I do not agree with.
I will use my own critical thinking process to discern which aspects I want to hold onto, and... Read more