Customer Reviews

Raising Boys: Why Boys Are Different - and How to Help Them Become Happy and Well-Balanced Men

5 star:		(28)
4 star:		(12)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

I bought this book because it became clear to me that I do not understand my 3 year old son and I realized it would only become worse as he grew older if I didn't at least try to figure out what is going on from his perspective.

I think that this book really tells it like it is. He doesn't sugar coat it. I also think the person who took offense to his saying boys should stay out of daycare until 3 years old did not read the book very carefully. He does not say that mothers should not work, he says boys should not be put in institutionalized day care settings but that good home based day care or staying with a family member is acceptable. I've read this in other books as well that boys just don't do well in daycare they really need one on one close time with a single, consistent care-giver be it mom, dad, grandma or a home day care.

This book also says many times how it is not trying to put women down or trying to set back the women's movement, it is just trying to show how boys are different. I have already noticed this with my children. I have two girls and a boy and I quickly picked up that my son is 6 months to 12 months behind his older sister in his speaking, reasoning and his ABCs. I talked to his preschool teacher about it and was relieved to find out it is normal for boys to be behind girls and the teacher said exactly what this author says, boys catch up somewhere in middle school but until then they are 6-12 months behind girls emotionally and academically. My son has a September birthday and I will be holding him out a year to start kindergarten at 6 instead of 5. I have already seen it in his preschool class how boys are treated, unwillingly as defective girls. Girls take to things like circle time and learning while boys would rather vroom cars and build block towers. I agree whole heartedly with the author that boys acting out in preschool is because they are anxious or stressed out. Girls withdraw when stressed, boys act out, often aggressively.

If you are ready to hear what this author says then buy the book. He is very strong on dad being a big part of a boys life and goes as far to say if dad is working 55 to 65 hours a week he won't cut it as a dad. This is hard stuff to hear, but if you want your son to grow up to be a good man it will take sacrifice on everyone's part. If we want our daughters to marry good men we need to make sure that we are raising good sons.

This is the BEST book I have read on raising boys. Biddulph writes in a clear, crisp voice making it easy for anyone to understand the fine art of being a male. He has made me realize how and why my husband and son are the same in some ways and very different in others. Girls are not ignored here, either. He compares and contrasts the two, so subtle differences are made just as obvious as the not-so-subtle ones. He takes time show why the two can act and/or react differently in the same situations. Everyone, especially teachers, should read this great book!

Biddulph is brilliant in this book...good tips, very insightful, written with compassion and in simple English...as the father of a teenage son I appreciate a clear roadmap like this..Other books I've found great lately on the subject of raising boys include: Real Boys (Pollack), about the myths of boys and how to overcome them; Raising a Son, which also has great basic advice, and some very insightful chapters in the PC Dads Guide to Becoming a Computer Smart Parent (Ivey), which talks about raising a son in the computer age.

In general, I enjoyed this book. It is well written and an easy read (you could probably get through it in one evening). I especially liked the delightful little drawings. I agreed with much of what the author was saying. Although we try and do the best we can and be balanced in our parenting, we cannot change the fact that boys and girls are different. What we need to do is to embrace those differences and work with them.

I just found the book to fall a little short in that much of it was common sense, and the author made many statements on what boys need, yet did not give suggestions on how to bring that about. Also, the author quotes many Australian stories, studies, examples, etc., which is fine if your Australian. I was hoping to relate to the stories a bit more.

Overall, not a very useful book, but enjoyable to read nonetheless.

Steve Biddulf has written a number a books in the Australian/New Zealand context on Parenting. His words about Boys are simple and matter of fact. Boys will not grow up to be sound men without help. This help can only come from the input of sound Men [preferably dad]at critical times in a boys maturation. Mom's are very important but they can't teach a boy how to be a man, for that the boys need a safe, strong male to model. Steve Biddulf sets out to help Dad's and Mum's sort out, First - what does it really mean when we say 'boys will be boys'? Second - How can I assist, as a parent, in helping my son to become aware of his 'maleness' and then assisting him to become a sound, loving but not wimpy man. Third - he tackles the thorny issue of single mums raising a son, how does mum, who can't be a man, raise her son? First recognising she needs help, then sorting out what to do about it. His style is simple, funny and never patronising. He is pointing out a real problem and proposing from a wealth of clinical and parenting experience his matter of fact pathway through the minefield. I loved the book, though I didn't agree with everything init, it has helped me focus on how to plan my relationship with my son. If you get the chance to listen to him in the flesh take it he is very good.

Even if you are a man, this book is a MUST read for anyone who has a boy or works with boys (teachers, coaches, etc). My husband and I read this in anticipation of the birth of our boy (I am 6 months pregnant) and we can't stop discussing what we've learned!

Biddulph takes you through the key stages in a boy's development, explaining in an easy to read format what can be done to assist boys in learning and developing into healthy, happy people. He explains the difference between what girls need and what boys need and how to help boys reach their potential.

After you read this, you will be like us - you will be buying this for everyone you know who is around boys! The best I've read on the subject. Can't wait to read his other books...

Teaching at a boys' school and having raised two boys of my own, I found I kept saying "yes, that's what happened" or "doesn't that sound familiar" or "I've been saying that, in a different way, for years". The book is well written, clear, with good examples and stories. Most importantly, it lays out how to do and be the best for your sons.

am very impressed. The format of this book is pleasing to read. The main points will be easy to reference as my boy grows. Scientific facts are used to make major points on how moms and dads should approach their boys at different ages. The author has definite opinions on how to raise a wonderful boy but doesn't shove them down your throat. His views are refreshing and make a lot of sense to me. I think this is a must-have book for parents.

Raising Boys is an excellent book that really highlights the ins and outs of raising a son. My wife and I read it prior to our son's birth. It prepared us for what to expect and I found myself laughing aloud at some of the stories. Some reminded me of my childhood with my brother and friends. I have kept it to review every couple of years since its easy to forget key points about ages beyond my son's age.

The stories are enchanting, and the information interesting. This is not a "how to" book, however. Instead, it is a general overview with many particular examples and explanations. The author's recommendations are straightforward and affirming, to fathers, mothers, and sons. He cares for and accepts the foibles and modes of boyhood. Biddulph has a whole chapter on the effects of testosterone, and I thought that was a little overdone, since our humaneness, as he notes many times later in the book, is not biologically determined.