Customer Reviews

Raising Kids Who Will Make a Difference: Helping Your Family Live with Integrity, Value Simplicity, and Care for Others

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

This is a surprising book! I usually don't like books that tell you how to raise your kids. I end up feeling guilty about all the things I did wrong that the author did right and I hate books that give a formula for parenting perfectly.

Vogt's book does just the opposite. She acknowledges that her parenting was less than perfect and her suggestions allow for a wide variety of approaches.

Best of all the author has put together a unique book that includes her ideas and principles on twelve different topics, observations from seasoned parents and reactions from their chlidren. She also puts in resources, exercises and great stories that kept my attention throughout.

I received this book as a gift and started reading it with reluctance but it just go better and better with every page. I especially like what Vogt's own kids had to say about the way they were raised and while they resisted some of their parent's idealism they turned out ok. Their daughter who wrote some of the funniest stories in the book is now serving in the Peace Corp.

Raising Kids... would make a great book on parenting and teaching values but it would also be a great read about how generations interact and approach topics from very different perspectives. I kept reading whole sections aloud to my wife while she was trying to read her own book.

This may be the best book I have ever read on parenting and sharing values with children.

My own children are grown with children of their own but I'm still a concerned parent and grandparent and Raising Kids who will make a Difference gives me hope. So much of what I read and see on TV disturbs me these days and I tell my adult children that I think it's a lot harder to be a parent today than it was a generation ago. I think Raising Kids Who Will Make a Difference can help. It combines the practicality of Dr. Spock that guided my parenting with the inspiration of spiritual leaders like Jesus and Gandhi and wraps them all up in age old values and wisdom that Vogt somehow manages to convey with a modern and accessible tone. I think ordinary parents will find they can relate to it, It's not just written with "super-parents" in mind. I felt consoled to know I did a lot of things right in my own parenting and that even my regrets are shared by other good parents.

Even though my active parenting days are over, I want to give this book to my children and the other young parents I know to help them get a good start. As Vogt says, "Start young....it's a lot easier to limit TV to an hour a day when the child is a toddler and gradually allow extensions than to announce to a preteen that the family is going to cut back on TV. If the rule has always been that everybody pitches in to clean house on Saturday, it won't meet with the resistance that some parents experience when they try to implement new policies that they picked up from a parenting class or from reading a book such as this one. If you're too late for the start young approach, approach your family gently and include everyone in the decision-making process." It makes a parent want to stretch but without guilt.

I really love this book. I'm in agreement with many of Susan Vogt's thoughts, but even if I weren't, her even-handed approach to her subject matter and her respect for her readers would impress me. Anyone looking for insight into helping their children to become adults of integrity, self-discipline, and compassion will find lots of wisdom here. The inclusion of her own children's perspectives is a delightful bonus. And Susan V's daughter Heidi is a fine writer (must be genetic!).

I sat down in my favorite chair in the living room intending to spend only about 15 minutes with it because that's all the time I had, and I couldn't put it down. Finished reading it later when I woke up with insomnia. It was a comforting book, one I wish I had had years ago. The realistic tone is a gift. Most intriguing were the end-of-chapter comments from the author's children.

This is one of the most insightful and practical books on parenting I've ever read. The blend of the Vogt family stories, as well as other families' perceptions make this book delightful and engaging. The honesty, sincerity and wisdom with which Susan Vogt writes present us with pragmatic, intentional and caring ways to "be" family. As a parent of young adult children, it was refreshing to be reminded that none of us parent perfectly!
Linda Moses
Co-President,
National Association of Catholic Family Life Minsters

Cracking the Parenting Code: 6 Clues to Solving the Mystery of Meeting Your Child's Needs

This book really made me think. Really enjoyed Susan's insight!

When I first started reading this book I only intended to spend a few minutes so I thought I'd start with the reactions of Susan Vogt's children to the chapters. Two hours later I was still reading because I found it so engaging. I could especially relate to the chapter on Ecology since our family values simplicity and tries to walk gently on this earth. Being a modern mother I felt reassured when Vogt talked about the issue of cloth diapers. Now the author does not equate disposable diapers with immorality and cloth diapers with virtue but she does raise questions about values and how we spend our time and money. In my own case, I was committed to using cloth diapers but assumed I would use disposables when traveling for convenience. When our first child started getting diaper rash with the disposable diapers, our doctor recommended using only cloth diapers. I soon discovered that it was just as convenient traveling with cloth diapers and as a bonus it fit with my value of respecting the earth. Being part Native American, this was important to me, but even more important was the knowledge that I wasn't the only one making such a decision.
This is just one example of many practical suggestions for helping ordinary families live with integrity and according to their values that the author weaves through this book. I felt like I was listening to a good friend.

Ms. Vogt's approach to parenting can be summed up in two words: behavioral conditioning. A director of family life for a Catholic diocese, Ms. Vogt is hyper-zealous about applying conditioning techniques to her family including: mandatory volunteer service at a soup kitchen, regularly joining protest demonstrations, mandatory family dinners where the father reads and discusses editorials, religious posters and messages in the dining room, discussions with children about their "faith development," and a large array of consequences and punishments.

Some of her methods seem to border on the fanatical: including picking up hitchhikers to teach compassion, mending children's clothes as a Christmas present, parent-child "date nights," and compelling her children to sign pledges that they will talk to her...

This book would be a pure manual of indoctrination techniques except for one saving grace. Ms. Vogt genuinely cares for her children, is honest that many of her methods don't work as expected, and is somewhat willing to change her approach to fit the reality of the situation. These momentary glimpses of the reality of trying to impose moral conditioning on children give the book some heart.

The opposite to Ms. Vogt's indoctrinary approach is the holistic, natural parenting, or internal approach, where instead of imposing behaviors and ideologies, we emphasize nurturing and evoking the child's inherent soul qualities and purpose. Some excellent books on this approach are: Connection Parenting by Pam Leo; The Natural Child by Jan Hunt; Raising Children who Think for Themselves by Elisa Medhus; and The Soul's Code by James Hillman.

In my humble opinion, children are more likely to make a difference if they are raised to discover their own purpose and calling, and express their natural altruistic desires, rather than being force-fed a curriculum in social responsibility.