Raising Pure Kids in an Impure World [Paperback]

Richard and Renée Durfield (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: June 1, 2004

Seventy percent of American teens have had sex by age eighteen. Richard and Reneé Dur¹eld—the parents of four grown children—encourage parents to help their teens resist sexual temptation using the practical "key talk" concept and a covenant with God to remain chaste. Includes how to have a "key talk," questions a child may ask, guidelines and goals for dating, praying for a child’s future spouse, and more. Originally titled Raising Them Chaste, this edition includes new information gained from the Durfield's ministry to families.

Editorial Reviews

From the Inside Flap

"A practical answer to a real problem...communicating a tender truth in a convincing way...providing a handle for gaining leverage to lift us from the moral quicksand sucking so many downward." from the Foreword by Jack Hayford, Senior Pastor of The Church on the Way

About the Author

Richard and Renee Durfield have been published in magazines including Focus on the Family and Charisma. They appear on national radio and television broadcasts and speak nationwide. Richard holds a Ph.D. in Marriage and Family Studies and teaches at Azusa Pacific University. Renee is the executive director of For Wedlock Only. Together they pastor Eagle Heights Community Church in Chino Hills, California. They are the parents of four grown children and make their home in California.

Product Details

• Paperback: 192 pages
• Publisher: Bethany House (June 1, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0764229028
• ISBN-13: 978-0764229022
• Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 5.5 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,074,805 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A practial plan for sexual purity, May 14, 2005

By 

Lynne Chapman "lynnechapman.com" - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Raising Pure Kids in an Impure World (Paperback)

Is the hope of raising children to be sexually pure, - to abstain from sex until marriage - an unrealistic goal held by Christians? Are we blinded to the reality of the world we live in?

Studies that report that at least 85% of all American teens have had sex by the age of 19, seem to support this view. When you add to that the high percentage of babies born to unmarried mothers and the increasing incidence of HIV infections and STD (sexually transmitted disease) among young people under the age of 25, it becomes a frightening outlook for parents wanting to raise healthy, happy children.
Simply raising children and hoping for the best is not an option. The goal of sexual purity requires a practical plan and tools for action.

Richard and Renee Durfield, in their book Raising Pure Kids in an Impure World, give you the plan. They also list practical steps and the tools to accomplish it, beginning with the "key talk" - a very special time and talk between parent and child where questions about dating, relationships and sex are brought out into the open and discussed. The time closes with a covenant and prayer of commitment that he or she will honor God with heart, mind and body. This commitment is made with the confidence that God honors His covenants and provides the grace and strength to see them through.

Even if your child is already dating, this book provides effective tools for discussing guidelines and boundaries. It also offers help for parents of children already dealing with the consequences of sexual sin.

From counseling their own children as well as others, the Durfields offer a section of some of the most commonly asked tough questions and suggested answers. After reading these, I realized my own ignorance and need for research. There is a list of recommended resources in the back of the book.

I've read books that give a list of "Thou shalt nots" and those that discuss the importance of establishing an inner standard of conduct - which is the basis for staying in God's will - but this book goes on to give parents the steps to teaching their child the whys of sexual purity and the ways to stand up to a life of peer pressure.

I highly recommend "Raising Pure Kinds In An Impure World" for parents of young children or of teenagers and also for aunts, uncles and grandparents - anyone who has an emotional investment in the life of a child. I found it well organized, easy to read, and a book with so much useful information that many will want to read it more than once.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Producing Godly mature children, June 22, 2004

By 

The RAWSISTAZ Reviewers (RAWSISTAZ.com and BlackBookReviews.net) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Raising Pure Kids in an Impure World (Paperback)

In today's world, children are being introduced to sexual immorality at much earlier ages than in the past. Television, music and the news are filled with sex and have our kids thinking about and preparing to incorporate sex into their lives before many are even mature enough to handle it. RAISING PURE KIDS IN AN IMPURE WORLD takes a look at a strategy used by Richard and Renee Durfield to guide their children in resisting sexual temptation. The Durfields use a concept called "key talk" with their children and others that have come seeking help from the risks of sexual promiscuity. In the key talk process, parents identify a time in the child's life when it is appropriate to have a one-on-one conversation about sex and the role it was intended to play in our lives. This discussion should be honest and open to cover all aspects of sex and the consequences in pre-marital relationships. After the talk, a covenant is entered into between the child and God. As a seal of the covenant the child is given a ring or necklace to wear at all times to symbolize the agreement between themselves and God.

The Durfields introduce an interesting approach for parents to consider using as they help their children stave off sexual promiscuity and handle peers that are pressuring them into it. Key talk is backed by scriptures from the Bible that show God's purpose for matrimony and the pitfalls of sex outside the marriage. The Durfields' guide is chock full of statistics, scriptures and questions with answers to cover just about any situation that parents may face when using this system. It is adaptable for use by nearly anyone facing issues of sexual purity at any stage in their lives.

I was especially impressed with the testimonials by not only the Durfields' kids, but all the other individuals who have used the key talk strategy and how they were able to keep their covenant with God despite the road blocks some faced. As this conversation with my child is fast approaching, I am now more confident in what I need to do and say as a result of reading this guide. The Durfields should be commended for putting together such a comprehensive and truthful guide.

Reviewed by Brenda M. Lisbon
of The RAWSISTAZ Reviewers