on February 6, 2010
I bought 3 books from Amazon to help educate myself on my twin pregnancy: 1) When You're Expecting Twins, Triplets, or Quads, 2) Twin Sense, and 3) Raising Twins. The 1st one has the most in-depth and medical information, which I find to be a huge help, particularly the section on specific nutrition requirements, which was hard to find anywhere else. The 2nd book is also quite good. I like the way it is organized and the tips it gives on what items to borrow or buy, and in what quantities. The 3rd book seems merely anecdotal when compared to the others. I had hoped for more since it was written by a pediatrician and mother of twins, but I found it to be light on content and completely superfluous given the more detailed information contained in the other two. I would recommend the book -- When You're Expecting Twins, Triplets, or Quads -- very highly.
on January 15, 2010
I'm a mom of 2 1/2-year-old twin boys, and I own five different books about raising twins. Flais' book is the best one by far because it's more honest than the others. She is very adamant that synchronizing your twins' skeds is key -- when one wakes up to eat, you wake the other one up. Period. I totally agree. Feeding them back-to-back will make you insane. Also, it is refreshing to read from a doctor that pacificers are not a good idea. I never used them -- just one more habit to break.
She also reminds you that you need to treat your twins as individuals, something that is easy to forget when you are so busy.
The best tips are in boxes, so they are easy to find. Plus, this book is short. No mom of twins has time to read more!
on December 12, 2009
As a pediatrician taking care of many families with multiples, I find that Dr. Flais' book is a practical and east-to-read guide which answers many basic care issues that parents face. She strikes a nice balance with her advice, recognizing that not all families function identically, and that there is not only one specific solution to all problems (which is a characteristic of parenting books that should be sought after in general). She also acknowledges that not every individual situation that parents encounter will go as smoothly as hoped, but if one stays true and consistent to your goals as a parent, increased success will generally be obtained over time.
There are a number of very practical tips in this book to help parents of multiples streamline their days, to be more efficient with routine tasks (feeding, toilet training for instance) and to be more cost-conscious at the same time. Many of her suggestions are applicable for raising any child (singleton or twin) and are well within the mainstream of parenting advice (such as the need for consistency with discipline strategies, the importance of adequate sleep etc.) I give her credit however for stressing the importance of making sure ALL members of the family are taken care of (including the parents) and the challenges that raising children can place on the relatioships within the parent. I think she places appropriate emphasis on the functioning of all the relationships within the family (not just parent-child).
The book is written with a positive yet realistic outlook on the different challenges presented by raising twins rather than a single child. These differences are not made out to be insurmountable or more difficult however, which should provide optimism to parents. She points out several joyful life moments that twins uniquely experience, which should provide parents a lot of positive feelings about their own capabilities and that of their children.
on January 1, 2013
I'm really amazed that the average rating is around 4.5 for this book. My overall feeling is that it's dry, and not very unique to twins. As a parent of two young children (5yrs and 18mos), I'm looking more for a "crash course" in Twin Specifics. I'm looking for the tricks and 'shortcuts' that will help us survive, especially those early months. I want the honest truth: "what is it going to take, and how am I going to muster it?"... and I don't have much time to read (already a little busy with 2 kiddos). I'm so bored with the book right now, I'm struggling to get through the last few pages, I almost gave it 2 stars... but as a parent, I do relate to the advice and facts. I don't think they're wrong/bad...
+ For First Time Parents, the author does a VERY nice job summarizing key parenting points, sleep training, naps, feeding frequency, formula/breastfeeding, etc. As a new parent with my first child, I probably would have given it 5 stars.
+ The author of this book has an older child, so there are some tips for managing sibling introduction and attention.
+ I'm a big fan of the Ferber sleep training method (and I think it gets a lot of unfair / bad press). This book explains it very eloquently. It talks about how to start sleep training without making it a scream-fest. It also goes one step further, giving ages/weights for when to start sleep training (something Ferber skirted around a little bit).
+ There are some illustrations for feeding positions (although you can just as easily find them online, or in the instructions for a twin nursing pillow).
- It's mostly just a parenting book, with a twin 'flavor'. Specific to twins, basically it says to get them on the same schedule, save money with hand-me-downs/yardsales/consignment, google Nursing Pillows, and accept help.
- *yawn* ... I think the tone tries to stay calm and relaxing, but wow... boring...
- "Twin Tips" are called out in boxes on each page or so. Good concept, but #1 they're not always "twin" specific, and #2 it seems like they're just fluff to take up space and make the book bigger. Very repetitive.
First time parents, go for it. Apparently lots of other people really liked it. And I agree that it's a good, reliable resource/summary, which seems to concisely provide TONS of info out (which can be overwhelming).
Experienced parents, it's a nice "brush-up", but there isn't much truly candid discussion of how this "twin world" is different, or what to do to survive it. If you have a little one (or more) at home, chances are you're exhausted already... and you may not have the time/energy to wade through the stuff you know for the few nuggets of Twin info.
on October 14, 2009
Raising Twins is a comforting, reassuring book that makes the prospect of raising twins a lot less frightening and overwhelming! I've read many books on raising twins and have not found any yet that match the ease and comfort of this book. It feels like getting honest advice from a trusted friend. It openly admits to the many challenges of raising twins, but it is very light-hearted and gives you many practical, real examples to use in your own life. There are even tips to help with the financial strains of raising multiple children. When I finished reading this book, I felt a refreshing wave of optimism that I WILL survive these years; I only wish I had this book before my now 2 year old twins were born! I am sure I will have this by my bedside as we make our way through the preschool years!! From a mother of twins, if you know someone expecting or already has young twins, get them this book!!!
on August 14, 2011
This book might be helpful to new moms, but I did not find it helpful at all. Most of the tips given in this book I already knew from raising my first daughter, others were intuative. The fact that the author was a pediatrician was not reflected in the book. It was more a motivational read: you can do it, hang in there, you're almost there. Not what I was looking for.
on February 20, 2013
I have 2 children and am now expecting twins. I read several books like this when I had my first child- books where the author makes statements about how you HAVE to do this or that or chaos will ensue- in this case, sleep training, waking babies up to feed them together etc. I'm glad these things worked for the author, but they don't work for our family and no gloom and doom scenarios followed! I prefer books where there are a number of options offered and an understanding that what works for one child/parent/family may not work for another.
Also, I am disappointed with her statements on breastfeeding. I am nervous to nurse twins, but her advice to 'not set long term goals' sounds like a cop out. The AAP set the goal of 6 months, and I absolutely think it's worth following the goal. I don't need a doctor to tell me it's not that important anyway....
on January 28, 2010
It can be scary to find out you're pregnant with twins- read this book, and you'll know what to do. Dr. Flais gives encouraging advice on how to handle two babies without losing your mind! I also like that she has kids in addition to her twins, and gives tips about family balance. Many twins are born early so the appendix about preterm birth is especially informative. I'm going to tell the triplet moms in my multiples club about the triplet appendix, too.
on May 13, 2014
I only got this book yesterday, but already am at around page 60. It is such a fluff piece so far. It is really meant for newbie parents, not for people who have already had a child or two and are now having twins. So far, all of the "Twin Tips!" are common sense, if that, and all they do is summarize the last 3 paragraphs you wasted your time reading. Yes, we all know that pregnant women have to keep up with their water intake, and yes, we all know that babies don't need to have everything absolutely brand new, etc. Also, so far, none of it is specific to actual twins! I bought this book to learn about raising twins but most of the information is basic to all babies.
That being said, I can get over the fluff, but the advice given with regards to breastfeeding is just not sound, and I'm surprised the American Academy of Pediatrics would approve it. It is NOT ADVISED to give the baby formula after a nursing session if you think the baby is still hungry. Especially not when you are trying to establish a brand new breastfeeding relationship. If baby is hungry, put baby to the breast. The breast is never fully empty and will continue to produce so long as there is suckling. The AAP specifically states: "Ask the doctors and nurses not to supplement your baby with water, glucose water, formula, or other fluids unless medically indicated.
If supplementation is needed, it should ONLY be ordered by your baby's doctor" ([...]). Furthermore, saying that there is a "magic time" (or something to that effect) sometime in between 3 and 6 weeks where it is crucial to introduce the bottle or baby will reject it, is quite frankly, bull. (I would love to see links to research that say otherwise!) Generally, you need to wait until breastfeeding is well established, and that can take anywhere between 3 and 6 weeks in and of itself. Seeing as how I have already nursed 2 babies for a total of about 3-3.5 years, I should know. It takes time, and with twins, I can't imagine that it would happen any sooner as they will be smaller and might take longer to learn how to latch. Therefore, this is just plain, bad advice. And trying to sleep train your baby, as long as they are at least 12lbs (which I don't get what it has to do with anything), doesn't make much sense. When you are trying to breastfeed your child, you nurse your baby when they cry, roughly every 1.5-2 hours. This is to establish your milk supply. Trying to sleep train while you are still establishing your supply is a great way to kill your supply and then you will end up as one of those moms who says "Oh, I just couldn't produce enough milk". Overall, I am not impressed. Written by a pediatrician, I expected more from this book. At least put some links to follow up or something to that effect.
The sleep training bit is all Ferber (http://www.amazon.com/Solve-Your-Childs-Sleep-Problems/dp/0743201639). So if you are all for letting your child cry it out, this book and her advice is for you. Otherwise, if you are the attachment parent type, grab another book!
Again, this is me only around page 60. If I manage to get myself to finish the book, I will update my review.
on October 16, 2009
Dr. Flais's book is an outstanding resource for all parents. Her Twin tips apply not only to twin families but all families with young children. Although I do not have twins,I found the book to be extremely helpful simply having young children close together in age. Dr. Flais gives practical advice that you can really use and it comes from the perspective of a mom experiencing the challenges with the expertise of a doctor. This is a must have for anyone who is expecting or has young children.